My next partner has to be a girl who works at a vape store

6/4/2020 6:46:21 PM

If I find myself in a situation where there's even a reason to consider a next person again, I expect y'all to remind me to save myself the trouble and just not even bother, how's that for a requirement

6/4/2020 8:59:49 PM

Under age 40, not vegetarian, doesn’t like too many things I find stupid

6/4/2020 9:07:18 PM

I'm married for life, bro. There is no next date.

6/4/2020 9:17:05 PM

The owner of this website made me feel pity

6/4/2020 9:21:58 PM

Quote :

"WAY BIGGER TITTIES"

6/5/2020 8:23:39 AM

My wife is younger than me and comes from a family where everyone routinely lives well into their 90s. She herself is very healthy, and both of us find all of our friends' divorces so annoying that we will overcome any challenge to stay married, just so we don't become equally annoying. So the odds of me needing a next person to date are low.

In the unlikely event that she is struck by a meteor or something, I think next time I'd want a dumb person. There's a lot to be said for a partner who is intellectual challenging and stimulating, and I'm happy I selected a spouse who fits that bill, but it turns out I also enjoy being able to spout all kinds of bullshit without anybody pointing out that I'm wrong.

Also, since any situation that involved me dating again would leave me emotionally devastated, it would be helpful if she put out on the first date. I'm not going to have the energy to put in any effort. So yeah, dumb and easy. So I guess my requirements are "Your mama"

6/5/2020 10:26:36 AM

6/5/2020 10:34:11 AM

Quote :

"If I find myself in a situation where there's even a reason to consider a next person again, I expect y'all to remind me to save myself the trouble and just not even bother, how's that for a requirement"

So, casual fucks, or Palmela Handerson for the rest of your life?

6/5/2020 1:15:25 PM

I love my wife and there are many things about here that I’d miss if I were involved with anyone else. But if I found myself in that position, I’d choose someone who was practically independent to the point that it was barely a relationship at all.

I’d want someone to spend time with on occasion, go to events with on occasion, and hook up with on occasion, which oddly would be equal amounts of sex.

Being married is great but it is a lot of work. If something were to happen to my wife, then I wouldn’t want to put in that effort a second time and would focus on having a relationship that included as much of what I miss from being single as possible.

6/5/2020 2:19:21 PM

dumb and easy like a Sunday morning

6/5/2020 9:30:24 PM

My next partner has to be a girl who works at a vape store

6/6/2020 12:33:37 AM

down to earth, doesn't play too many mind games, and hopefully a person that makes me laugh

6/6/2020 5:18:13 PM

^hey boo...

6/7/2020 1:21:21 AM

They have to be Shawna

6/7/2020 1:27:05 AM

6/7/2020 6:32:36 AM

I got a kickass wife and there's really no different type I'd look for 2nd time around. If anything, slightly lazier so she knows how to lounge around the house with me.

6/7/2020 8:19:58 AM

mn1rocibittdnl

6/8/2020 3:18:24 PM

mn2rocibitthbt

6/8/2020 3:33:36 PM

They hate boat trailers?

6/8/2020 3:46:55 PM

no, hbt, duh

6/8/2020 3:52:25 PM

acraw
a girl who works at a vape store

[Edited on June 8, 2020 at 6:16 PM. Reason : -]

6/8/2020 6:15:24 PM

ive been thinkin about gettin a womed that has her own house and money and wants someone to work on the honey do list and bone

6/8/2020 7:28:03 PM

This is now the Official Patrice O'Neal Appreciation thread.

6/8/2020 9:45:47 PM

https://www.google.com/search?q=mn1rocibittdnl

5 results on the whole damn world wide web, and all from TWW.

6/9/2020 4:18:53 AM

It was started on TWW.

6/9/2020 8:06:40 AM

Quote :

"do NOT lie"

6/9/2020 8:35:22 AM

My number 2 rule of chicks i bang is that they have big titties?

6/9/2020 10:57:09 PM

Any updated requirements?

3/20/2021 12:12:22 PM

I haven't put very much thought into this at all. If I'm not divorced I suspect my wife will have to like this person. I dunno, that sounds like a lot of work and I am really lazy.

How about I never date anyone ever again?

3/20/2021 2:04:11 PM

3/21/2021 9:59:07 PM

Quote :

"How about I never date anyone ever again?"

3/21/2021 10:10:32 PM

Hit the gym my bro

3/21/2021 10:12:02 PM

Since I will probably be divorced within the next 2-9 years, I need to put some thought into this.

3/23/2021 3:34:28 PM

Why do you think you're going to be divorced in the next 2-9 years?

3/23/2021 4:52:41 PM

Been with the wife almost 20 years now and been married 17. I like a lot about her obviously if I've stuck with her this long. In some ways though I think I would go the opposite direction of Geppetto. My wife and I are comfortably independent and for the most part I really appreciate that. She doesn't have to be up my ass about stuff, I have my own hobbies and interests and she doesn't have to get involved or give me shit for them.

My main changes if I had to date again would be somebody that is a bit more extroverted and energetic. My wife is pretty damn introverted and has a hard time making and maintaining friendships. I don't have a problem with this but I feel bad that I'll do stuff with friends and bring her along or not but she doesn't get to reciprocate and have girls nights out. Outside of that I would like somebody who is a little more self motivated and energetic. As we have gotten older I find the bulk of the chores and dealing with the kids and shit fall on me. She doesn't complain when the house is dirty but she also barely lifts a finger to do it. She has low energy and work really takes it out of her. So if we split and I had to do it all over again I'd want somebody with more energy and more motivated.

3/23/2021 5:09:00 PM

antidepressants might help her

3/23/2021 5:38:20 PM

For sure. I went to marriage counseling and it was honestly a good experience. Also 1:1 personal counseling has been extremely useful.

3/23/2021 7:28:43 PM

^^Oh she's tried a lot of different ones and has coaching therapy and counseling. Sadly most drugs work for a bit and then her body gets used to them. We did marriage counseling years ago. I'm not upset about it and I know she is trying to do better. Just tough seeing somebody you care for deal with something that you can't see and you personally have never experienced and not being able to help.

3/23/2021 8:00:47 PM

You're a good man

3/23/2021 8:07:15 PM

^

3/23/2021 10:25:45 PM

They gotta be a tdubber




I'm never dating again

3/24/2021 12:03:24 AM

I think the last shut down may have finally dropped the female population to 0?

3/24/2021 1:15:20 PM

I think my odds are low too

1 - Must work at a vape store
2 - Must not wear crocs

3/24/2021 1:34:30 PM

I think i ran off shawna prior to that by saying she and banjoman were getting married.

sawahash posted on 3/6. But yeah.

3/24/2021 1:34:44 PM

^and I'm married, so I'm not really interested in dating right now

4/9/2022 4:22:09 PM

N/A

4/9/2022 5:17:16 PM

Jesus…the pool was bad enough 7 years ago (in my mid-30s) when I last checked.

It is abysmal now.

I’ll just start with “not overweight” to avoid instant disqualification. That narrows it down to about 20% of the, say, 30-45 year old population.

To pare that down to the ones I’d actually date, I think it’s about 0.1%.

4/9/2022 11:50:44 PM

Too many requirements, hence why I will stay single forever

^ You should move to East or Southeast Asia, where 80% are NOT overweight. (more TBH)

4/11/2022 8:37:28 AM

I could go for an azn ugh

4/15/2022 2:34:43 PM