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 Message Boards » » Put your sprerrys outside tonight Page [1]  
Novicane
All American
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Freezing temps will help get rid of the stank

1/6/2014 7:46:06 PM

hey now
Indianapolis Jones
14975 Posts
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What about a freezer for the other 364 days?

1/6/2014 8:48:37 PM

dweedle
All American
77386 Posts
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the freezer doesn't get as cold (on typical setting) as the air will tonight does it?

1/6/2014 8:54:13 PM

Novicane
All American
15416 Posts
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Yeah

1/6/2014 8:54:27 PM

modlin
All American
2642 Posts
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Also, you don't wanna stank up all your frozen food.

1/6/2014 9:16:33 PM

dtownral
Suspended
26632 Posts
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spray with vodka
put in plastic bag
put in freezer
then occasionally respray with vodka on occasion and after long days

(rubbing alcohol works, but vodka smells less)

1/6/2014 9:18:37 PM

hey now
Indianapolis Jones
14975 Posts
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Fucking savages and your smelly ass shoes. Apologies for my naivety.

1/6/2014 9:21:24 PM

NeuseRvrRat
hello Mr. NSA!
35376 Posts
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I like the smell of my hair treatment sperrys. A pleasin' odor's half the point.

1/6/2014 9:22:51 PM

HCH
All American
3895 Posts
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Hey Bros! Boatshoe Bobby here. I've been drinking gimlets in Nantucket all summer, asking all the blondes on the island the most enduring question of our time: What rhymes with hug me? The results have been baffling: It's almost like these Sigma Kappas have never had anyone ask them to touch their elbows behind their backs back in the day. But now that Labor Day is over, I'm back from that little Gray Lady of the Sea, grinding in the 9-to-5 as a paralegal at my dad's law firm. You know what that means, right? Guilt-free dicking off on his company's dime, bitching in the BroBible comment section about the lack of NSFW pics, and not giving a damn about job security. That's something middle managers with state school educations care about.

Today I'm here to talk about an epidemic that's running rampant in Bro culture, one that might be considerably worse than "The Great Whiskey Dick Plague of '10": Repugnant boat shoe odor. It's the equivlant of swamp-ass for the feet. Sperry Stink is truly a modern Bro dilemma, with many-a chaying Bro being rejected by the hottest biddies in the land thanks to the stench of their feet. After a summer of hard livin' in those Sperrys, September is the month a Bro's boat shoes tend to get the most putrid. They've been collecting spilt beer and ballpark urinal afterflow for months, so who knows what kind of foot-gonorrhea is growing between the laces down there. To keep your Sperrys looking and smelling fresh, here are 17 super-clutch lifehacks to eliminate the dreaded Sperry Stink. All credit goes to Reddit's very few frat stars.

Chay on:

"Take out the sole and replace it with something that isn't leather. I've used Dr. Scholls in the past and it worked fairly well." -- jlw525

"Get a couple pairs and rotate. Just letting them dry for a full 24 hours does wonders. This goes for dress shoes as well." -- cowboyhaze

"Dryer sheets over night. Works like a charm." -- DustyGoDucks

"Freeze them. Apparently it kills the bacteria causing the odor. I've tried it and it works for a while but the smell will come back eventually." -- reekomds

"Gold bond foot powder, works like a charm. Also, don't be afraid to wear socks with them. Mainly when you're wearing long pants cause shorts, socks and sperrys will kind of make you look like an asshole" -- 369DAMNyoFINE

"Shin-high Socks with sperrys is pretty fucking popular in Charleston. Still trying to figure out why. Also, I wear loafer socks with my sperrys. It's a good way to go if you don't scrub your feet well enough or just have smelly ass feet" -- FLHCv2

"I put these odor eater things in them. They're insoles and kill all odor, including keeping your feet fresh." -- nofatchicksever

1/6/2014 9:32:09 PM

Skack
All American
31140 Posts
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Y'all know you can get a can of Odor Eaters for like $7 right?
I don't even have foot stank and I own one.
I'm just sayin'

1/6/2014 9:47:28 PM

slappy1
All American
2303 Posts
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I'm half tempted to do this with my vibrams that smell like a bag of assholes if I was convinced it worked.

It's -2 here right now and probably colder with wind chill

1/6/2014 9:52:40 PM

Skack
All American
31140 Posts
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Do homeless people smell better today if they stayed out last night?
This crossed my mind at 3:00 a.m. when I was having trouble sleeping. Thanks T-Dub.

1/7/2014 3:42:17 PM

d357r0y3r
Jimmies: Unrustled
8198 Posts
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They probably died, so no.

1/7/2014 4:04:28 PM

Smath74
All American
93278 Posts
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^well they are probably still frozen which will have preserved them from rotting to a large extent, so they might still smell better.

1/7/2014 4:07:04 PM

Bullet
All American
28427 Posts
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I had to google Sprerrys. I initially assumed it was some kind of reference to the Mary Jane Rotten Crotch.

1/7/2014 4:28:05 PM

CarZin
patent pending
10527 Posts
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I heard bed bugs don't like the cold. Put that stank mattress in the front lawn tonight.

1/7/2014 4:33:03 PM

Jeepin4x4
#Pack9
35774 Posts
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Quote :
"I'm half tempted to do this with my vibrams that smell like a bag of assholes if I was convinced it worked."


what's the risk? you wake up in the morning and your shoes are cold. either it worked or it didn't

1/7/2014 4:34:23 PM

BridgetSPK
#1 Sir Purr Fan
31378 Posts
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I was thinking theft.

1/7/2014 4:36:08 PM

Jeepin4x4
#Pack9
35774 Posts
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it's probably a small market of thieves out looking for dank smelling women's sized toe shoes.

1/7/2014 5:00:41 PM

Skack
All American
31140 Posts
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A small, but very dedicated, market.

1/7/2014 8:17:29 PM

Novicane
All American
15416 Posts
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my shoes fresh today

1/7/2014 8:48:03 PM

slappy1
All American
2303 Posts
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My room is the third floor of my house, and I had done about 200 squats the hour prior and was melted into my bed at the time. Would've needed something really big to get me downstairs. Like wings or back tickles.

1/7/2014 11:27:50 PM

settledown
Suspended
11583 Posts
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oh shit i'm going to put my sperrys outside tonight

1/7/2014 11:41:33 PM

spöokyjon

18617 Posts
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How does cold air get rid of the stank?

1/8/2014 12:00:19 PM

wdprice3
BinaryBuffonary
45912 Posts
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cold kills the bacteria

1/8/2014 12:02:01 PM

JayMCnasty
All American
14180 Posts
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yeah i have a buddy that stores his hats in the freezer from time to time.

1/8/2014 12:17:01 PM

settledown
Suspended
11583 Posts
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it didn't work

1/8/2014 12:44:28 PM

spöokyjon

18617 Posts
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Freezing doesn't kill bacteria, afaik.

1/8/2014 1:09:54 PM

Skwinkle
burritotomyface
19447 Posts
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Fareako put his Vibrams outside. They smell significantly less godawful, but that could just be from getting aired out more than they usually do.

1/8/2014 1:11:12 PM

Grandmaster
All American
10829 Posts
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I just microwave mine like I do with sponges.



not really tho.

1/8/2014 2:01:45 PM

Bullet
All American
28427 Posts
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Quote :
"Freezing doesn't kill bacteria, afaik."


it kills some bacteria
http://www.newton.dep.anl.gov/askasci/mole00/mole00219.htm

1/8/2014 2:05:02 PM

HCH
All American
3895 Posts
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Put my minimus shoes out last night.


Didn't work. Still stink. Will just need to buy new ones this weekend.

1/8/2014 2:16:27 PM

ncsuallday
Sink the Flagship
9818 Posts
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these socks are great for sperrys



don't see them; shoes don't stink. problem solved.

google "no show socks" or "liner socks"

1/9/2014 2:02:02 AM

TreeTwista10
minisoldr
148457 Posts
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I eat frozen chicken cause the cold kills the e. coli

1/9/2014 8:26:31 AM

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