HEADLINES FROM THE YEAR: 2029

Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world, Mexifornia, formerly known as California.

White minorities still trying to have English recognized as Mexifornia's third language.

Spotted Owl plague threatens northwestern United States crops and livestock.

Baby conceived naturally! Scientists stumped.

Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage.

Iran still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 10 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.

France pleads for global help after being taken over by Jamaica. No other country comes forward to help the beleaguered nation!

Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.

Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.

85-year $75.8 billion study: Diet and exercise is the key to weight loss.

Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs.

Global cooling blamed for citrus crop failure for third consecutive year in Mexifornia and Floruba.

Abortion clinics now available in every High School in United States.

Senate still blocking drilling in ANWR even though gas is selling for 4532 Pesos per liter and gas stations are only open on Tuesdays and Fridays.

Massachusetts executes last remaining conservative.

Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates their civil rights.

Average height of NBA players is now nine feet seven inches. Other requirement to play: player can only have 3 illegitimate children.

New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters and rolled-up newspapers be registered by January 2030.

IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent.

Floruba voters still having trouble with voting machines.

Now, send this to whomever you want and as many as you want, then, guess what....NOTHING will happen. No miracles, no money, absolutely nothing, except you might make someone smile or make them very very scared.

I Love This Country!
It's The Government That Scares The crap out of Me!

8/23/2010 7:49:35 PM

Quote :

"Senate still blocking drilling in ANWR even though gas is selling for 4532 Pesos per liter"

The future is bright after all!

Quote :

"Spotted Owl plague threatens northwestern United States crops and livestock. "

It's about time!

[Edited on August 23, 2010 at 8:04 PM. Reason : .]

8/23/2010 8:03:23 PM

Headlines from the year 2029

State has a 28 game win streak against UNC in football.

Chuck Amato admits to having breast implants on his deathbed.

8/23/2010 8:04:56 PM

A friend of mine really likes this book.

I like reading his stuff, and find him very interesting and insightful. This book might be a little much for me to take as much more than educated, but wild, conjecture.

[Edited on August 23, 2010 at 9:33 PM. Reason : ]

[Edited on August 23, 2010 at 9:33 PM. Reason : i hate the new google images]

8/23/2010 9:33:09 PM

8/24/2010 12:17:49 AM

^^It's pretty wild. He thinks China is going to crash and the real leaders will be us, Japan, and...Poland?

8/30/2010 8:49:30 PM

I thought for sure this thread would be about Kurzweil, particularly considering that recent spat he had with PZ Myers.

8/30/2010 9:36:50 PM

^ what spat?

8/30/2010 9:56:18 PM

prolly something about the cult of personality Kurzweil has created around "TEH SIGNULARITAH!!1!"

8/30/2010 9:59:10 PM

http://scienceblogs.com/pharyngula/2010/08/ray_kurzweil_does_not_understa.php

http://www.kurzweilai.net/ray-kurzweil-responds-to-ray-kurzweil-does-not-understand-the-brain

http://alfin2100.blogspot.com/2010/08/neither-ray-kurzweil-nor-pz-myers.html

8/30/2010 10:31:05 PM

Quote :

"By a margin of 57- 33 percent, respondents said that taxpayers should not subsidize experiments using embryonic stem cells, in a survey by of likely voters by Rasmussen Reports. The results neatly reversed the findings of a similar poll less than 18 months earlier, which had shown broad support for President Obama’s decision to expand federal funding of the research "

WTF

http://www.catholicculture.org/news/headlines/index.cfm?storyid=7390

8/30/2010 10:34:38 PM