i dont get it.

whats wrong with the back, shoulder etc?

do they do it in other sports?

11/4/2009 11:31:01 PM

gay

11/4/2009 11:31:33 PM

gay

11/4/2009 11:31:50 PM

Quote :

"do they do it in other sports?"

Is this a serious question

11/4/2009 11:32:04 PM

oh wait, i guess they do huh. i know football...how prevalent is it in basketball though?

in order or highest butt slaps per player, this is what i've noticed

1) baseball (by a lot)
2) football
3) ?

11/4/2009 11:32:29 PM

totally gay

11/4/2009 11:33:14 PM

this thread could've easily been titled:

I'VE NEVER BEEN ATHLETIC. EVER.

SO I'M HERE TO IMPLY THAT ATHLETES ARE GAY.

but in all seriousness, I don't see that many athletes patting asses. And I certainly grew up an athlete.

[Edited on November 4, 2009 at 11:35 PM. Reason : fdaasdds]

11/4/2009 11:33:40 PM

^

11/4/2009 11:34:08 PM

^^ is ~

[Edited on November 4, 2009 at 11:34 PM. Reason : Cuz he's an athlete]

11/4/2009 11:34:29 PM

I bet synapse changed in the stall during gym class

11/4/2009 11:34:42 PM

I saw Fareako jogging today.

HE TOTALLY SLAPS ASS

11/4/2009 11:36:05 PM

it's a well known statistic that 37% of all professional athletes are on the "down-low"

11/4/2009 11:36:11 PM

wears his shirt in the pool tool

11/4/2009 11:36:27 PM

I was training for a half marathon. Oh shit, I guess I'm ~

11/4/2009 11:36:43 PM

its not gay if you say "GOOD GAME" immediately after doing it

11/4/2009 11:37:47 PM

Quote :

"oh wait, i guess they do huh. i know football...how prevalent is it in basketball though? in order or highest butt slaps per player, this is what i've noticed 1) baseball (by a lot) 2) football 3) ?"

1) I'll bet you don't even watch much baseball. it's just easier to make this generalization because the pants are tight, I suppose? I played baseball for 14 years. I can't recall a time I slapped an ass, or had my ass slapped.

2) I'm sorry you aren't, and have never been athletic. I mean, chics do dig it.

11/4/2009 11:38:02 PM

Quote :

"I'VE NEVER BEEN ATHLETIC. EVER."

all i did in high school was soccer, tennis, golf and cross country and i don't remember a coach touching my ass. guess i played the wrong sports for all the homo shit.

Quote :

" I'll bet you don't even watch much baseball. it's just easier to make this generalization because the pants are tight, I suppose?"

true, i don't watch much. but when i do, there seems to be TONS more ass slapping going on than football, which i watch more of

Quote :

"I mean, chics do dig it."

chicks dig male on male ass slapping? thats a new one on me

11/4/2009 11:38:24 PM

Why is synapse such an ass looker

11/4/2009 11:38:38 PM

Quote :

"i don't remember a coach touching my ass"

doesn't mean it didn't happen

you might of repressed it

11/4/2009 11:39:12 PM

And what's the deal with those bats?

11/4/2009 11:40:13 PM

they should call an exterminator to take care of them

11/4/2009 11:40:51 PM

They look like dicks

Why are they always rubbing pine tar on them

[Edited on November 4, 2009 at 11:41 PM. Reason : ]

11/4/2009 11:41:39 PM

Quote :

"all i did in high school was soccer, tennis, golf and cross country and i don't remember a coach touching my ass. guess i played the wrong sports for all the homo shit. "

again. I played baseball for 14 years. Never an ass slapped. Ever. I also played football through 10th grade. never an ass slapped.

I GUESS MY COACHES WERE STRAIGHT


if anything, we'd hit the shit out of teammate's helmets. and seriously, I watch MLB, and have since I was about 7. I've never noticed it. What stale comedian gave you this inclination?

[Edited on November 4, 2009 at 11:43 PM. Reason : asdfasda]

11/4/2009 11:41:43 PM

Quote :

"again. I played baseball for 14 years. Never an ass slapped. Ever. I also played football through 10th grade. never an ass slapped. "

yeah i played baseball for a few years too..this might be an adult on adult thing. i could see the kid angle causing problems for the coaches

Quote :

" I watch MLB, and have since I was about 7. I've never noticed it."

Never noticed it? I'm watching the series and have seen 3-4 in the last 30 minutes.

11/4/2009 11:43:06 PM

Maybe you just a have a stupid ass

11/4/2009 11:43:25 PM

Where have you seen this occur?

Just, where?

cause, I mean, I've heard this from World of Warfare kids forever, and have never seen it--at least not as a rampant issue.

11/4/2009 11:45:28 PM

Oh, I know.

I don't look for it.

I suppose the thread ends here.

11/4/2009 11:46:19 PM

Quote :

"watching the series and have seen 3-4 times in the last 30 minutes."

11/4/2009 11:46:39 PM

Why is synapse such an ass looker

11/4/2009 11:47:41 PM

I suppose the difference is that I watch the sport, and you're on McCarthy watch for men smacking men on the behind. Clearly, these filthy rich mega-athletes want to fuck one another.

11/4/2009 11:48:45 PM

I bet synapse annoys the fuck out his boyfriend sitting beside him trying to watch the damn game

11/4/2009 11:49:37 PM

Quote :

"I suppose the difference is that I watch the sport, and you're on McCarthy watch for men smacking men on the behind. Clearly, these filthy rich mega-athletes want to fuck one another."

busted

11/4/2009 11:50:52 PM

I do know that all through my 3 years of playing All-State baseball, I was very conscious about my arm and hand. I never high-fived. Never. I would either bump fists, or pat on the back, or slap someone's helmet, if anything at all. If you understand baseball, you know that your hand and arm are important--especially if you're a pitcher (make an expected quip about that, please).

11/4/2009 11:51:22 PM

Quote :

"One of the fencers at Johns Hopkins, Jim Pearce, had this intriguing theory about the origin of the butt slap (and it uses Chuck Norris, so it must be a pretty solid theory): "I believe this is a simple matter of equestrian tendencies for the male gender. Every man desires to be a cowboy; look at Chuck Norris in Walker Texas Ranger. The man epitomizes machismo. So, ultimately if Mr. Norris needs to travel quickly, how can he motivate his horse to move faster? He slaps its [butt]. Likewise with sports, men need to commune and help motivate one another as a team. It's standard practice and common courtesy to slap another man's [butt] if you feel he is slacking. Not only is that fact, that's science.""

11/4/2009 11:54:44 PM

Quote :

"I suppose the difference is that I watch the sport, and you're on McCarthy watch for men smacking men on the behind."

I lolled

11/4/2009 11:57:35 PM

well, support your borrowed theory. did these butt-slaps occur when a teammate in question was slacking, or underperforming?

11/4/2009 11:57:39 PM

most of the stuff i'm seeing says it's more of a good job thing, a reward if you will, rather than something motivational.

11/5/2009 12:00:11 AM

that's what i'd buy first.

probably the last thing i'd buy is the gay thing.

not that you said that.. . .but i could feeeeeel the implication. i suppose because the butt is relatively painless/padded? hitting someone pretty hard on the shoulder could feasibly hurt a little. likewise w/ the back. the butt doesn't hurt-ever.

?? I dunno. It's never been an issue, or even a non-issue for me. I just overlook it.

11/5/2009 12:04:08 AM

At least it isn't hockey where they hold the guy down and rape blow him every time he scores a goal.

11/5/2009 12:06:38 AM

really, in soccer, isn't it pretty common to gang tackle a guy after he's taken off his shirt?

Quote :

"all i did in high school was soccer, tennis, golf and cross country"

and really, I'd expect it's more prevalent in team sports, where you're constantly congratulating people.

[Edited on November 5, 2009 at 12:09 AM. Reason : dfadfasdd]

11/5/2009 12:07:52 AM

11/5/2009 12:08:27 AM

Quote :

"probably the last thing i'd buy is the gay thing."

haha what gay thing? like they're all closeted homos or something? i doubt people seriously think that, except for some sociology professor deep in winston or wherever. i bet she has tons of theories about machismo and repressed homosexuality.

Quote :

"i suppose because the butt is relatively painless/padded? hitting someone pretty hard on the shoulder could feasibly hurt a little. likewise w/ the back. the butt doesn't hurt-ever. "

see that makes sense. slap away, and you're not gonna take somebody out of the game.

look at that. 20 some weak sauce troll attempts later and we actually come to an answer. tdub actually DOES deliver sometimes!

11/5/2009 12:09:41 AM

^^lololol

I don't speak for A-Rod. I hate that guy. but seriously, he didn't grab Jeter's ass in that gif.

^exactly. kinda like any man loves breasts because he wants to fuck his mother. ridiculous.

[Edited on November 5, 2009 at 12:11 AM. Reason : asdfasdasda]

11/5/2009 12:10:36 AM

A-Rod actually is a homo (not that there's anything wrong with it) so that's an exception to the rule.

11/5/2009 12:11:46 AM

Why Do All These Homosexuals Keep Sucking My Cock?

By Bruce Heffernan

Look, I'm not a hateful person or anything–I believe we should all live and let live. But lately, I've been having a real problem with these homosexuals. You see, just about wherever I go these days, one of them approaches me and starts sucking my cock.

Take last Sunday, for instance, when I casually struck up a conversation with this guy in the health-club locker room. Nothing fruity, just a couple of fellas talking about their workout routines while enjoying a nice hot shower. The guy looked like a real man's man, too–big biceps, meaty thighs, thick neck. He didn't seem the least bit gay. At least not until he started sucking my cock, that is.

Where does this queer get the nerve to suck my cock? Did I look gay to him? Was I wearing a pink feather boa without realizing it? I don't recall the phrase, "Suck my cock" entering the conversation, and I don't have a sign around my neck that reads, "Please, You Homosexuals, Suck My Cock."

I've got nothing against homosexuals. Let them be free to do their gay thing in peace, I say. But when they start sucking my cock, then I've got a real problem.

Then there was the time I was hiking through the woods and came across a rugged-looking, blond-haired man in his early 30s. He seemed straight enough to me while we were bathing in that mountain stream, but, before you know it, he's sucking my cock!

What is it with these homos? Can't they control their sexual urges? Aren't there enough gay cocks out there for them to suck on without them having to target normal people like me?

Believe me, I have no interest in getting my cock sucked by some queer. But try telling that to the guy at the beach club. Or the one at the video store. Or the one who catered my wedding. Or any of the countless other homos who've come on to me recently. All of them sucked my cock, and there was nothing I could do to stop them.

I tell you, when a homosexual is sucking your cock, a lot of strange thoughts go through your head: How the hell did this happen? Where did this fairy ever get the idea that I was gay? And where did he get those fantastic boots?

It screws with your head at other times, too. Every time a man passes me on the street, I'm afraid he's going to grab me and drag me off to some bathroom to suck my cock. I've even started to visualize these repulsive cock-sucking episodes during the healthy, heterosexual marital relations I enjoy with my wife–even some that haven't actually happened, like the sweaty, post-game locker-room tryst with Vancouver Canucks forward Mark Messier that I can't seem to stop thinking about.

Things could be worse, I suppose. It could be women trying to suck my cock, which would be adultery and would make me feel tremendously guilty. As it is, I'm just angry and sickened. But believe me, that's enough. I don't know what makes these homosexuals mistake me for a guy who wants his cock sucked, and, frankly, I don't want to know. I just wish there were some way to get them to stop.

I've tried all sorts of things to get them to stop, but it has all been to no avail. A few months back, I started wearing an intimidating-looking black leather thong with menacing metal studs in the hopes that it would frighten those faggots off, but it didn't work. In fact, it only seemed to encourage them. Then, I really started getting rough, slapping them around whenever they were sucking my cock, but that failed, too. Even pulling out of their mouths just before ejaculation and shooting sperm all over their face, neck, chest and hair seemed to have no effect. What do I have to do to get the message across to these swishes?

I swear, if these homosexuals don't take a hint and quit sucking my cock all the time, I'm going to have to resort to drastic measures–like maybe pinning them down to the cement floor of the loading dock with my powerful forearms and working my cock all the way up their butt so they understand loud and clear just how much I disapprove of their unwelcome advances. I mean, you can't get much more direct than that.

11/5/2009 12:12:58 AM

Quote :

"I was training for a half marathon. Oh shit, I guess I'm ~"

I play real sports...not trying to be the best at exercising.

11/5/2009 12:15:41 AM

kinda gay

11/5/2009 12:15:59 AM

anyone who grew up playing and watching sports knows this takes place. They also know there are 2 types: Congratulatory and the "let's get fired up" motivational butt-slap.










http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wopeVyuGRPg&feature=player_embedded#

11/5/2009 12:29:26 AM

haha ok that last one is a little weird, dude's hand is up willie's butthole. football makes sense because they probably wouldn't really feel it if you hit them on the shoulder with a little tap, with the pads..

i know in baseball, the only time i've ever done it was just to be an asshole and smack somebody as hard as i possibly could, or when our team was bored as hell and somebody wanted to "fire us up" and that would be pretty hard too. never really known anything about the little pats.. maybe i wasn't paying attention though.

11/5/2009 12:42:02 AM

set em up

11/5/2009 12:42:55 AM