...I steeled myself to watch every episode of Dallas. I'm almost through the second season.

And it just dawned on me that we got Dallased.

I know Bush is a little New England boarding school bitch, but shit, he probably watched Dallas in between beer bongs and the like.

We got fuckin Dallased, y'all.

1/4/2008 1:52:52 AM

Would you care to explain more specifically what you mean by "Dallas'd?"

Other, that is, than "80's soap primetime soap opera about some wealthy Texan oil magnate" and "Somebody shot J.R. but it really was a dream and such."

1/4/2008 2:13:41 AM

please pull out some genius-level, insightful metaphor here...i really want to see it, seriously


otherwise i'm gonna have to move this to chit chat

1/4/2008 2:30:57 AM

Dr. Chaos has protested my comparison. I dunno bout you, but that kinda controversy seems like just thing that the Soap Box needs at the moment.

I've now finished the 25th episode where JR tries to set up Pam in a three-way and coming up is the episode about Lucy and her potential marriage. I don't think I have enough to go on right now to share an elaborate metaphor.

In the meantime, I'd like this DrSteveChaos suspended for revealing that "who shot JR?" was all a dream. He ruined my New Year's resolution!!!

1/4/2008 2:52:35 AM

OMG, Lucy's potential fiancee just told Bobby that he is a "homosexual." He thought Lucy's full-of-life attitude would bring him out of it, but after doing it with her, he realized he was still homosexual.

He said it multiple times, and Bobby was still cool with it, told JR that gay Kit was more of a man than him.

Which is why Reagan sucks big gigantic balls.

Fucking late 70's, and they got gay characters, and all is mostly well.

And what does Reagan do with such awesomeness? Fucks it all up with the gay/AIDS/drugs shit.

We took a billion steps back with that little fucker. FUCK REAGAN!

1/4/2008 3:17:02 AM

I protest nothing. I just don't get it off the bat, and thus would be eager to hear some further explanation.

Also, everybody knows about the J.R. plot. I mean, come on, if you lived through the 80's, that's pretty common knowledge.

Also, Darth Vader is Luke's father, and Snape kills Dumbledore. (There, I'm finished).

1/4/2008 3:36:28 AM

"I'm telling you, Lucy, I'm not gonna change. I know it. I'm tired of trying. I've got to learn to like myself the way I am."

(line aired in 1979)

I just wanna share a big FUCK YOU to anyone who doesn't get it.

It's not about the marriage issue. It's about you fuckers who are 30+ years behind the times.

(And I'm pissed off this episode didn't sink in with ole W and friends.)

1/4/2008 3:36:44 AM

^^AHAHAHAHAHHAHA

1/4/2008 3:40:24 AM

in before the move

1/4/2008 3:44:48 AM

Pregnant Sue Ellen's passed out drunk in her car. And barely of age Lucy is all hopped up on pills tryna get with ol Ray like they used to when she was 16. Things aren't looking too good for the Ewings, folks.

[Edited on January 4, 2008 at 4:31 AM. Reason : I love this show!]

1/4/2008 4:30:26 AM

Quote :

"in before the move"

1/4/2008 4:32:43 AM

Doctor Chaos, isn't there anything you can do?

Sue Ellen needs your guidance!!!

1/4/2008 4:36:44 AM

you know, it's pretty sad when your new year's resolution...

is to watch TV.





I'm just sayin

1/4/2008 5:06:07 PM

^You're not much for the humor, huh.

1/5/2008 2:35:00 AM

I B T D



[Edited on January 5, 2008 at 2:49 AM. Reason : ]

1/5/2008 2:48:03 AM

no. I think it' hilarious that you have such a pathetic resolution

1/5/2008 4:48:31 PM

^That's the joke, dipshit.

It's a ridiculous resolution. The notion of someone "steeling" themselves to needlessly watch every episode of Dallas is absurd.

I'd understand if I got a "WTF?" from some people. That's fine...they don't get "it." But don't turn my absurd premise back on me and talk about how hilariously pathetic I am.

I'm almost done with the third season now. I'll keep you updated, bitch.

1/6/2008 11:56:10 AM

but, it seems to me that it actually is a resolution you have made. given that you just said you've "made it through the third season..."

1/6/2008 7:20:04 PM

In before the move, bob.

1/6/2008 7:22:40 PM

^^It's not a "real" resolution. I expect people to think it's ridiculous. It's absurd. I never thought folks would get down on their knees to bask in the glory of my righteous resolution. It's not about self-improvement or helping the world...it's a joke.

The fact that I'm actually watching Dallas is irrelevant.

You can call me pathetic for watching Dallas, but you cannot call me pathetic for jokingly asserting that I'm "resolved" to watch Dallas.

I'm moving in on the fourth episode of the third season now. Just a billion more episodes to go. I'm really quite extraordinary when it comes to keeping my commitments so I think I can have this done by the end of the month. Maybe I should turn my efforts and attention to Magnum PI next. What do you think, aaronburro?

1/6/2008 11:05:07 PM

Sometimes I wish that instead of just locking a thread it were possible to physically lock someone inside their thread and then burn it to the ground.

1/6/2008 11:20:05 PM

Not possible.

My obnoxiousness > fire.

1/6/2008 11:26:12 PM

1/6/2008 11:29:45 PM

1/6/2008 11:32:21 PM

i can just hear the Dallas anthem now

1/6/2008 11:33:27 PM

My New Year's resolution
Is to keep gettin head

1/6/2008 11:39:46 PM