"I have a tough time letting people in"...

The situation: He's your bf of one year who just moved in with you 2 months ago. You're in love with him and thought things were going great, and then all the sudden he drops the "I don't want too serious a relationship".

10/21/2007 6:05:50 PM

it happens



move on

(if someone doesn't want you around, it's stupid to try and change it... why the hell would you want to be with someone that doesn't want you anyway?)

[Edited on October 21, 2007 at 6:07 PM. Reason : ...]

10/21/2007 6:06:40 PM

it means you got owned

10/21/2007 6:07:06 PM

If at this point in the relationship you don't know exactly what he means when he says anything, you don't have any long-term prospects.

10/21/2007 6:08:09 PM

sorry to say this, but could there be another girl involved?

10/21/2007 6:08:16 PM

sounds like he is dumb

wtf...relationship for a year and even moves in with you and then he says that?

10/21/2007 6:10:04 PM

kick him in the nuts and walk away.

10/21/2007 6:10:41 PM

^^ Thank you, yes. Apparently he thought I'd want to see him less if he moved in. I see him twice a week because he works odd hours.

^^^^^^or something^ because he says he cares about me. He didn't say he doesn't want me around... he just doesn't want me being as serious...?

And I havent found another guy yet who suits me as well.

Damnit, this is too complicated for tdub.

[Edited on October 21, 2007 at 6:12 PM. Reason : sdf]

10/21/2007 6:11:17 PM

After a year, he says that? yeah, there is something else going on that he isn't saying. And why is he moving in with you if he doesn't want to be with you? what does he want to be, just roommates?

10/21/2007 6:12:45 PM

I asked him if there was another girl, but he says there isn't, which doesnt mean I beieve him

10/21/2007 6:14:09 PM

Shit like this is why I don't date.

10/21/2007 6:16:40 PM

life isnt a scooby doo episode


he isnt just gonna come out with it all just cuz u ask


thats not the playa way

10/21/2007 6:16:41 PM

damn you dont believe your bf after over a year in a relationship? u might want to move on before he does

10/21/2007 6:17:09 PM

Sounds like he wants to have his cake and eat it too.

10/21/2007 6:17:10 PM

does he use your makeup?

10/21/2007 6:18:20 PM

God i hope we're not talking about the guy in leather pants in your gallery.

10/21/2007 6:19:51 PM

well, the circumstances in which we got together to begin with will always leave me with a suspicion... He was with someone, and we flirted alot, and altho we didn't do anything physical, he didn't tell her about alot of what he did... like going out to a club with me one evening, or that we went to the gym together.

Plus I'm a naturally suspicious person.

But he did say he's not a player and if he'd been playing me he'd have been gone already..

^he was dressed like that for halloween

[Edited on October 21, 2007 at 6:21 PM. Reason : sdf]

[Edited on October 21, 2007 at 6:21 PM. Reason : sdf]

10/21/2007 6:20:15 PM

sounds like you need to evaluate yourself, honestly


u arent making sound choices

10/21/2007 6:21:13 PM

so do you guys like drink each others blood and stuff?

10/21/2007 6:21:32 PM

i mean, if it were me, and i had been with you for a year, somethin pretty drastic has to have happenned for me to say something like that to you.

seems like things took a 180 degree spin, that doesn't just come out of the blue.

either he "woke up" and realized exactly what he's looking for and doesn't think he needs you as a part of his life, or he still has great feelings for you and doesn't want to hurt you even though he is via seeing someone else.


i donno, i've never had a GF, so these theories may be completely void, but i just plugged and chugged myself into the situation.


btw, i'm sorry if i sound harsh, just trying to be real so i can help.

10/21/2007 6:22:12 PM

Quote :

"He's your bf of one year who just moved in with you 2 months ago. You're in love with him and thought things were going great, and then all the sudden he drops the "I don't want too serious a relationship"."

Sounds like he should've thought about the "serious relationship" thing before you decided to live together.

10/21/2007 6:23:47 PM

did you drop the E(ngagement) bomb? that sends em running

10/21/2007 6:23:49 PM

It means you got played.

10/21/2007 6:25:04 PM

^^^



[Edited on October 21, 2007 at 6:25 PM. Reason : d]

10/21/2007 6:25:29 PM

haha if he cheated on his ex bitch to get with you, things are not looking good...

10/21/2007 6:25:38 PM

but.... he is still with me and he says we can try to work things out... we;re both making some small changes, and he says he's always moody in October....

10/21/2007 6:28:29 PM

lol thats something dudes tell females to get them off our backs

10/21/2007 6:29:04 PM

lol, always moody in october? hmm...

10/21/2007 6:29:48 PM

you can do and deserve much better then this! Just don't accommodate what you deserve for a man, it makes the rest of us womens look bad.

Why wait along for someone whose not willing or wanting to want all of you all the way all the time?

10/21/2007 6:38:12 PM

Quote :

""I don't want too serious a relationship"."

response: "too late"

10/21/2007 6:39:40 PM

moody during this month? what kind of excuse is that? Something else is going on.

move on and find someone who really wants to be with you. ^^ is right.

[Edited on October 21, 2007 at 6:40 PM. Reason : ^]

10/21/2007 6:40:07 PM

is that the guy?

[Edited on October 21, 2007 at 6:45 PM. Reason : .]

10/21/2007 6:44:40 PM

Quote :

"Why wait for someone who's not willing or wanting to want all of you all the way all the time?"

[Edited on October 21, 2007 at 6:48 PM. Reason : seriously]

10/21/2007 6:48:16 PM

how's that cheesy quote go?

Quote :

"Don’t settle for the one you can live with… wait for the one you can’t live without."

or something like that.

[Edited on October 21, 2007 at 6:52 PM. Reason : ]

10/21/2007 6:49:21 PM

What's so hard to understand? He didn't realize until he lived with you that he doesn't really love you or want this relationship to go any farther.

10/21/2007 6:50:07 PM

^then why is he willing to wait a little longer to see how things pan out?

10/21/2007 9:11:51 PM

so he can figure out how to keep you from finding about girl #2

10/21/2007 9:13:51 PM

^^My guess is that he either 1) doesn't want to have to move out or 2) likes the sex.

[Edited on October 21, 2007 at 9:16 PM. Reason : Most likely the latter. But why fuck around with someone who isn't willing to be serious about you?]

10/21/2007 9:14:18 PM

i dont feel like reading all of this but this guy is a fucking dumbass, if he didnt want "too serious" of a relationship then why the hell did he move in with you?


k i read it


"moody in october"????????

hahahahahahahahahahahahaha

who the fuck says that??

[Edited on October 21, 2007 at 9:19 PM. Reason : /]

10/21/2007 9:15:42 PM

yall are missing the point. What does it mean when he says "I have a tough time letting people in"...

is it just bullshit, or do some guys take longer to develop real feelings for someone? or is it a trust issue?

10/21/2007 9:17:06 PM

Quote :

"then why is he willing to wait a little longer to see how things pan out?"

so he can find someone else to move with :/

^it sounds like a bullshit excuse to use this late in the relationship. He should have thought everything through before moving in. Has he lived with past girlfriends before?

10/21/2007 9:17:26 PM

if he drops this "I don't want too serious a relationship"

then this shit ain't gonna last forever

you need to be thinking about #1, soul sista

10/21/2007 9:18:36 PM

^^^bullshit

[Edited on October 21, 2007 at 9:18 PM. Reason : .]

10/21/2007 9:18:44 PM

might not be bullshit... who knows.

could be trust issues.

10/21/2007 9:19:48 PM

its bullshit

this guy is a joke, he's buying his time until he finds a way to move out and get out of the relationship without senmding his home life into meltdown mode

10/21/2007 9:20:16 PM

any dude that moves in with his broad before they are married is asking for trouble

10/21/2007 9:20:29 PM

to be fair, sylvershadow seems like a trifling hoe

fucking with her emotions might be the only way to go

10/21/2007 9:20:44 PM

wtf, you move in with a guy after 1 year of being together?


Crazy much ?.... he probably let you move in because you pressed the issue and he didnt want to seem like the bad guy. Now you're cluttering his space.


Its too soon. Move out and continue dating, when its time to get serious..... he'll let you know

10/21/2007 9:23:31 PM

^^no kidding.

Quote :

"yall are missing the point. What does it mean when he says "I have a tough time letting people in"... is it just bullshit, or do some guys take longer to develop real feelings for someone? or is it a trust issue?"

It's bullshit, and plainly so.

It's sad you actually have to ask this.

Quote :

"your bf of one year who just moved in with you"

learn2read

[Edited on October 21, 2007 at 9:24 PM. Reason : df]

10/21/2007 9:24:01 PM

hes probably been hurt before or is very suspicious of people

doesnt want to say the 3 words and have a real serious relationship when its only been a year.

because he knows it could end

hes just protecting himself from a big let down by not committing a lot


or

he could simply be keeping u around for awhile until he finds someone new.

just depends on his character and past

10/21/2007 9:24:21 PM