Quote :

"Thanks for telling me (swallowing pride now) but I can't be your friend. Maybe one day I'll be able to have a decent conversation with you without trying to hold back angry words, but not yet."

Does her statement hold any chance that I can fix the relationship?

Some people have said, just give it time (3-6 mos), while others have said to ask if she would meet for coffee or something to just talk (neutral location - not a date - middle of the day).

Only one person has said not to pursue it any further.

What is your opinion(s)?

I'd really like to right my wrongs, if I could.

[Edited on September 19, 2007 at 11:34 PM. Reason : eg]

9/19/2007 11:33:16 PM

you're fucked. might as well forget her and move on

9/19/2007 11:33:56 PM

Quote :

"you're fucked"

9/19/2007 11:34:12 PM

Need pics and backstory.

9/19/2007 11:34:23 PM

Whatever chance you've lost to bwn her in the next few months has been bombed to hell. Whatever you said, it was probably hurtful. Give yourselves both some time to cool down and let her contact you later on.

9/19/2007 11:34:37 PM

move on

9/19/2007 11:34:42 PM

move the fuck on for your own good

9/19/2007 11:44:01 PM

No pics, she's rather cute/hot though.

I'm sure there is a decent amount of past baggage/emotional damage.

I up and told her (before she left on a trip) that I didn't believe we were going to work out, b/c I couldn't tell if she was a rebound or not. I didn't want that and neither did she.

She flipped out on me calling me a liar and other things, b/c she asked me before we hung out more if that's what I was looking for.

I wasn't looking for a rebound, but I was fresh out of a relationship (less than a week) and I had some crazy emotions floating around. Including, but not limited to starting over with my ex.

That's what prompted me to call the new girl and tell her my concerns.

If I had to do it over again, I would have kept my mouth shut and been happy.

I'm trying to move on btw. I just have to get it out my system first. She was a very awesome girl and I'm going to miss a lot by not being in a relationship with her.

[Edited on September 19, 2007 at 11:53 PM. Reason : g]

9/19/2007 11:52:00 PM

go downtown this weekend and fuck a girl.. Any girl you can pick up. That'll help some.

9/19/2007 11:53:55 PM

dude it's so over. forget about it

9/19/2007 11:54:33 PM

^I'm not like that. It would be a lot easier if I were though.

Quote :

"let her contact you later on."

If it's up to her, I'm sure she wouldn't ever talk to me again.

[Edited on September 19, 2007 at 11:56 PM. Reason : eh]

9/19/2007 11:54:55 PM

Sorry to hear that. I have no idea except don't hound her. Let her come to you when she feels better. If she likes you enough she will come back, if you burned that bridge o h well move on.

9/19/2007 11:55:10 PM

fresh out of a relationship...

move on.


do you know how many girls are out there?

Hint: she isn't the only one.

9/19/2007 11:59:08 PM

sorry, dude, but having been there and fucked up a really great friendship that was turning romantic, I have to say that it's over. pack yer bags up and move on

9/19/2007 11:59:25 PM

What about a Xmas gift and a nice card?

I'm trying not to hound her, as I know that will drive her further away. I've just grown up in a internet enabled world and can't seem to grasp that relationships take time to make or break.

I feel like I should do something about it or I really will lose her forever.

Of course I have to take into account that I want the best for her, as I can't be too selfish (even though it appears to be so).

If she came right out and said, "don't speak to me ever again", I would obey. She hasn't said that though. Maybe she considers it a possibility or maybe she forgot to include it.

I'm just missing her and what could have been, tis all.

[Edited on September 20, 2007 at 12:02 AM. Reason : e]

9/20/2007 12:00:04 AM

Well, be glad your thread hasn't turned into this:

?topic=473215

don't bring your troubles to TWW, man.

9/20/2007 12:00:20 AM

Quote :

"If it's up to her, I'm sure she wouldn't ever talk to me again."

Well, you basically told her she was a rebound. Just move on, accept you fucked it up.

9/20/2007 12:00:21 AM

my advice is to not accept any relationship advice from stillfuchsia no matter how lucky she might get every now and then with something correct

9/20/2007 12:00:56 AM

just give it up.

9/20/2007 12:01:16 AM

leave her alone, and only talk to her if she talks first.

i'd be chasing some strange if I were you

9/20/2007 12:02:58 AM

Let her come to you.

DO
NOT
CONTACT
HER
FIRST

9/20/2007 12:03:38 AM

Mind control FTW.

In the future, we'll never have to give up on relationships.

9/20/2007 12:05:14 AM

I did tell her she was a rebound, in not so many words. I could see myself saying it, but I couldn't stop it.

I was really fucked up inside. I'm a bit better now.

Though I did rock out to her fav. band the last day I saw her.

AND she smiled at me and actually spoke to me.

[Edited on September 20, 2007 at 12:09 AM. Reason : rock n' roll]

9/20/2007 12:05:21 AM

get you a couple of hoodrats and start knocking them out real quick before you're ready for the real thing. you just need to bust this first nut right now.

9/20/2007 12:28:21 AM

Quote :

"you're fucked. might as well forget her and move on"

trewf


sorry, but i've been there and done that, she's gone

9/20/2007 12:34:16 AM

she's never going to forgive you for killing her savior... get over it

9/20/2007 12:37:05 AM

Quote :

"I did tell her she was a rebound, in not so many words. I could see myself saying it, but I couldn't stop it. I was really fucked up inside. I'm a bit better now."

haha dude I feel you


I fucked up like that before

chalk it up to bad timing and move on, if it works out one day it will...

but no nice words from you or sympathy from her will make shit work

if you're a good dude and she doesn't see wanna come back down the road, her loss

if she's see that there were issues and understands that things are different now, then maybe she'll come back...

it's just gonna take time man, go ahead and live your life... it's too short to worry about the actions of one other person

9/20/2007 12:42:25 AM

find a REALLY hot girl, much hotter than her. And let the other girl see you with her and how happy you look. That will drive her up the fuckin wall!

9/20/2007 12:49:55 AM

only if you videotape you and the new girl!

9/20/2007 12:51:00 AM

you're not kidding about the bad timing.

i'm the master of that shit.

i hope i'm a good dude.

yeah, living my life is gonna be slightly harder since i feel like my soulmate hates me.

i just hope i'm not chasing a dream.

I FIGURED IT OUT:

I fucked it up b/c I was scared to have someone that I could love as much as they loved me.

I've always been in relationships where there was a imbalance of love. It was usually where they would love me MUCH more than I did them, if at all. Hell, all of them were like that. This experience has led me to figure out the root of my problem.

With her, I have no problem saying "I love you", I could never bring myself to say it to other girlfriends.

[Edited on September 20, 2007 at 1:02 AM. Reason : proper introspection is key.]

9/20/2007 12:54:54 AM

the truth is there is no sound advice.

you're dealing with a woman.

today, she may genuinely hate you.

tomorrow, she may be telling people she is betrothed to you.

i can not be more serious.

just let it ride.

9/20/2007 12:59:46 AM

I guess in my fucked up mind I wanted to have her, but not.

I made it so that I couldn't have what I wanted.

I can't believe what I did to myself.

My only hope is that by letting things be, that she will reconsider and that we can start over instead of trying to fix things.

9/20/2007 1:04:23 AM

gorls.

9/20/2007 1:10:29 AM

Quote :

"my advice is to not accept any relationship advice from stillfuchsia no matter how lucky she might get every now and then with something correct "

yeah, it's not like I've had any relationships or anything

9/20/2007 1:11:34 AM

Quote :

"you're not kidding about the bad timing. i'm the master of that shit. i hope i'm a good dude. yeah, living my life is gonna be slightly harder since i feel like my soulmate hates me. i just hope i'm not chasing a dream."

time man, thats it... we've all fucked up before

honestly I do feel like I did the same exact thing and lost the one person that was pretty much a perfect match because of it

but like I said, shit happens for a reason... if it's meant to work out it'll find a way to do so

just live your life, have fun, do what YOU have to do

Quote :

"I FIGURED IT OUT: I fucked it up b/c I was scared to have someone that I could love as much as they loved me. I've always been in relationships where there was a imbalance of love. It was usually where they would love me MUCH more than I did them, if at all. Hell, all of them were like that. This experience has led me to figure out the root of my problem. With her, I have no problem saying "I love you", I could never bring myself to say it to other girlfriends."

well, I never said that "word", but I understand what you mean... I had a psychotic ex that was not helping my life that is now out of the picture (thank you wake county)

but it was too late already... when I had all my shit figured out I had already fucked it all up cause I was so worried about bullshit in my life

but thats a lesson learned

Quote :

"the truth is there is no sound advice. you're dealing with a woman. today, she may genuinely hate you. tomorrow, she may be telling people she is betrothed to you. i can not be more serious. just let it ride."

correct!

Quote :

"I guess in my fucked up mind I wanted to have her, but not. I made it so that I couldn't have what I wanted. I can't believe what I did to myself. My only hope is that by letting things be, that she will reconsider and that we can start over instead of trying to fix things."

give it time


I do appreciate the fact that you've taken words out of my head and posted them for me

well, I was just scared really and trying not to doo too much one way or the other

because I had more issues than TIME magazine earlier this summer

9/20/2007 1:11:54 AM

fuck her sister or best friend and se what happens

9/20/2007 3:38:47 AM

It'll most likely take some time. Continue to be nice/friendly to her, but not overbearing. In the meantime try to date around a little, make sure that you don't just want this girl because you can't have her now.

9/20/2007 3:51:22 AM

The relationship will never be a meaning one ever again. Wait it out, and see later on in life if there is anything worth trying to salvage

9/20/2007 7:06:42 AM

it means she wants butt sex

9/20/2007 7:33:04 AM

Quote :

"you're fucked. might as well forget her and move on"

9/20/2007 7:38:43 AM

Sure, you can fix the relationship. If you change that "just give it time" to 3-6 years maybe....

Speaking as a girl, you're fucked. Cut your losses, try not to get bitter, and move on. It sucks that you're hurting, but it will pass. Also - NO XMAS PRESENTS. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. NO NO NO NO NO.If she means as much to you as you say she does, respect her wishes. It's for the best.

[Edited on September 20, 2007 at 8:02 AM. Reason : didn't read the whole thread before posting]

9/20/2007 7:58:04 AM

I doubt there's a chance of a romantic relationship again, but it looks like you may not even want that any more. I'd say to put it out there that you're willing to talk about what happened and let her go from there. At this point that's about all you can do that will help. Definitely no christmas presents, though.

9/20/2007 8:32:47 AM

guys and girls can't be friends...in most cases

9/20/2007 8:45:30 AM

i find it odd that your asking for advice on something a girl said but all but 3 of the comments have been made by guys

9/20/2007 8:54:08 AM

You fucked it up. Move on. But if you do anything else as hilarious as this, make sure to tell TWW about it.

9/20/2007 8:57:06 AM

Quote :

"I up and told her (before she left on a trip) that I didn't believe we were going to work out, b/c I couldn't tell if she was a rebound or not. I didn't want that and neither did she."

TRANSLATION: "I don't really like you and rather than continue fucking you mentally and physically I want to now "self destruct" whatever we have and never see you again."

9/20/2007 9:49:13 AM

Quote :

"guys and girls can't be friends...in most cases"

QFT

9/20/2007 9:50:04 AM

Ok, so the girl says 'fuck you and have a good life' and you forget about it.

Then she messages back after a few months, what now?

9/20/2007 9:56:07 AM

bail on this broad

9/20/2007 10:22:00 AM

^^

grudge fuck her. Then when you're done tell her you hate her. lol

9/20/2007 10:22:49 AM