Barney: He's dead Andy. Stone cold dead!Andy: Now Barney, there's no need to get all upset. Have you got your bullet?Barney: Yea right here.Andy: Good we might need it later if someone needs shooting.
6/7/2007 11:42:00 AM
I had no idea what Mayberry was until the Canes played the Canadiens and all those dumb frogs were trying to knock the south.Maybe you should ask a Canadian.
6/7/2007 11:45:10 AM
haha
6/7/2007 11:52:25 AM
Andy: Mmmm mm would you look at the size of that wound.Barney: It's a bigun alright.Andy: How many hushpuppies you think would fit in there?Barney: Oh that's a three hushpuppy wound if I ever saw one.
6/7/2007 11:55:33 AM
Rule number one of writing a script. Spell all your words correctly.
6/7/2007 11:55:44 AM
Ahaha, reminds me of the Family Guy where Charles Bronson is playing Andy:Barney: Have you seen Floyd?Andy: I shot him.Barney: Oh, o--you WHAT?Andy: Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to Emmit's Fix-it to . . . fix Emmit.
6/7/2007 12:20:03 PM
^^^ & ^ lolOtis: "Hey, whats Mr. Foley doing in my cell?"Barney: "You remember that discount meat last week?"Otis: "Yeah."Barney: "Well it wasn't cow."As an aside, Jim Lindsey was played by James Best who later went on to be Sheriff Roscoe P. Coltrane on the Dukes of Hazzard.[Edited on June 7, 2007 at 12:23 PM. Reason : ^]
6/7/2007 12:22:57 PM
6/7/2007 12:54:19 PM
"I had no idea what Mayberry was"Mayberry is about the only thing my north carolina home town is known for.
6/7/2007 1:08:24 PM
6/7/2007 1:09:38 PM
Opie: Pa, why did Mr. Johnson get shot?Andy: Well Opie, sometimes you get so mad at someone..your lip starts a tremblin, your eyes poke out...Opie: Kinda like Barney when he gets mad?Andy: Oh it's worse than that. He just gets a hating a fellow so much, he wants to kill him. Opie: Like Ernest T?Andy: Naww.. Ernest gets mad but he just talks a lot. The fellow who killed Mr. Johnson must've hated him a whole spell more. Opie: It's wrong to kill folks ain't it Pa?Andy: Yes Opie..and if you do..the law will catch up with you.Opie: Even with the person who shot Mr. Johnson?Andy: Yes Opie.Opie: Pa, what's a defensive wound?
6/8/2007 1:52:54 AM
are you people making this shit up on the fly? cause if you are, i'm impressed.
6/8/2007 2:03:42 AM
Andy: Sir could ya please step outta your pickup?Otis: [incoherent grumbling]Andy: Now I done an asked you once, could ya get out of your pickup?Otis: [incoherent grumbling]Andy: Imma give you to the count of three to get out of this here pickup or Deputy Fife is gonna have to use the taser.Barney: Andy I uh...well...I uh [whispers] left the taser back at the jail.Andy: Now whadiya go an do that for!I too am a former Mayberry resident...
6/8/2007 7:26:47 AM
6/8/2007 7:30:56 AM
i dont think they had tasers in mayberry. i'm a big AGS fan and i've never seen one.
6/8/2007 7:42:28 AM
Andy: Now Otis, think hard...do you remember talking to Ben Johnson last night at the bar?Otis: Oh Andy you know I can't remember anything when I been drinkinBarney: Otis you can't remember anything when you're sober!Andy: Barney! Now Otis..you were the last one to see ol' Ben alive. Did he say anything to you?Otis: Can I go back to sleep Andy..I'm real tired.Barney: Let me use the club on him Andy!Andy: Now Barney we're not beating on Otis. They may do that stuff in Raleigh but not here.
6/8/2007 10:56:45 AM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DjNHxP2MYwQCan't embed
7/20/2007 7:16:42 PM
Andy: You notice anything Mr. Johnsons' last meal?Barney: No.Andy: These cucumbers have been soaked in kerosene.
10/14/2007 8:03:05 PM
You need to incorporate Mr. Frisby and his drunk rooster.
10/14/2007 8:10:03 PM
10/14/2007 8:20:41 PM
^ Thats what I thought until I saw that Simpsons recently.
10/14/2007 8:24:21 PM