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 Message Boards » » Has cheating on your SO become the social norm ? Page 1 ... 4 5 6 7 [8] 9, Prev Next  
FAI756843
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Can't turn a hoe into a housewife. ( there are a lot of hoes in this thread who think they aren't hoes )

/thread.

[Edited on January 18, 2011 at 6:28 PM. Reason : x]

1/18/2011 6:28:14 PM

bmel
l3md
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hoes don't act right.

1/18/2011 6:29:00 PM

grimx
#maketwwgreatagain
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bmel knows first hand yo!

1/18/2011 6:32:29 PM

twoozles
All American
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reformed hoes

1/18/2011 9:11:18 PM

QTPie
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This whole thread makes me laugh....

1/18/2011 9:12:06 PM

TheBullDoza
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Nerdchick cheated. I didnt catch her, but she eventually told me.

Why I think she cheated.

I came down like the thunder and busted out a 7 letter word, worldly. I took the lead by 70 points ...at least! A few turns later she laid down a 7 letter word and retook the lead winning in the end. I was not surprised that I lost, but she told me afterwards that she sifted through the letters to get what she needed I won by default and to this day am the scrabble champion in our relationship

1/18/2011 9:40:53 PM

qntmfred
retired
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lolololol

1/18/2011 9:53:40 PM

Polojal
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that shit sucks

1/18/2011 11:34:54 PM

walkmanfades
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So many dudes in this thread straight up lying just to earn points with their TWW girlfriends.

1/19/2011 12:06:09 AM

face
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ive cheated on every girlfriend ive ever had until my current one.

It's just a character flaw really. It's fun it feels great, blah blah...

it also ruins the relationship you're in at the moment because you get paranoid.

It's actually really easy to get away with the key is totally detaching yourself from reality and not being afraid to lie right to your girlfriend's face.

3 of those 4 girls ultimately ended up cheating back on me at some point. Mostly because i was so emotionally detached from them because i was more into the other girls i was fucking in my car, bed, their room, their roomates bed, their laundry room, front porch, etc. For the most part the guys were pretty good looking and or semi-well known people so i cant really blame them, as i was cheating on them with average looking and good looking girls non of whom were at all famous. Also I was a HUGE dickhead and have no idea why any of these hot girls wanted to date me anyway haha

Cheating is something i think about from time to time, its only natural when hot girls hit on you. But it's not something im willing to do again. At some point you have to grow up and value happiness over desires.

I know that sounds gay and trust me 5 years ago id be standing here calling myself gay, but it's true.

Cheating sucks and its something losers do to validate themselves. They think they gain power from getting women to succumb to their dick. And that part is true, but the rest of my post describes why its not worth it.

[Edited on January 19, 2011 at 12:57 AM. Reason : a]

1/19/2011 12:50:17 AM

State Oz
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If a girl sleeps with 1000 guys, she's a whore.

If a guy sleeps with 1000 girls, he's a god.

If a guy has never had sex with a girl, it's probably <insert your favorite user here>.

1/19/2011 1:00:31 AM

Noen
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Just to touch on Sparky and Pikey's exchange.

I think Sparky is in the much healthier relationship. Being open and honest about sex is a great thing. Having a conversation akin to "I think think she's hot and I want to do her" is really just an invitation to the deeper conversation about what's missing, or going on that has someone considering infidelity.

Pikey on the other hand, you're establishing a relationship of trust by ignorance. I can tell you from experience that this is destined for failure.

In Sparky's approach, problems can be addressed and resolved before anything happens. Before your SO becomes detached, or cheats, or leaves you. In Pikey's world, you're just going to be having dinner one night and your wife is going to slap you with divorce papers "out of the blue".

Expecting perfection out of imperfect creatures is a recipe for disaster.

1/19/2011 7:51:56 AM

Str8BacardiL
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I ususally disagree with Noen but that was a good post.

1/19/2011 8:29:12 AM

OopsPowSrprs
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Quote :
"If a guy sleeps with 1000 girls, he's a god."


I get why people say this but it's really only true if the girls are marginally attractive. If a guy sleeps with 1000 fat chicks he's still a loser.

Girls will be whores regardless of the attractiveness of the guys, however.

1/19/2011 8:43:40 AM

sparky
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just to expand on what Noen said, i think in a perfect world Pikey's view is a good one. his view reflects the views of many devout religious people and it works for them. however, i like the open and honest approach and knowing that in the circle of trust you can say things and will not be bashed for it. I know several couples that have an open relationship and it works for them. its not for everybody and its not even for me at this point and time but people change, relationships grow and I won't be so ignorant to say an open relationship won't work for me in the future, but for now its unnecessary.

1/19/2011 8:52:12 AM

Supplanter
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Long term relationships are a lot like contracts. You agree upon the rules early on. If both parties say no cheating, then no cheating. If both parties say that if you start to consider it, lets have a conversation about what to do, then have a conversation. If both parties agree to an open relationship, then have an open relationship. Its not the kind of contract you set up that is good or bad, its the breaking of trust that is the downfall (which is basically another way of saying the same point others have already made).

I've always taken the no cheating approach to serious relationships and make it clear that its a deal breaker for me, but to each their own as long as everyone is on the same page from the get go. Been in the same relationship now for nearly 8 years, so it works for me.

1/19/2011 9:15:28 AM

Pikey
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Neon:
Both Sparky's and my scenarios are both flawed relationships. Many people, myself included probably, would not be able to recover their relationship after having a bomb dropped on them like that. Sure, the SO is being open and honest with you about their feelings and it is a starting point to discuss deeper issues. It can also open up a huge can of worms that snowballs into a disaster. Does that make me "insecure" because I can't deal with the thought that I am not enough for the person I pledged to spend my life together with? I don't think so. I want to know that I am the only one for my wife and that she is the only one for me. In ALL aspects of our relationship. If her car gets a flat and she needs a ride to work, I want her to call me. If she needs to get off, I want her to be fucking me. If she is on her death bed, I want to be the one next to her holding her hand. Not her fuck buddy. TO ME, this is what being in a relationship means to me... partners and best friends. And if that makes me "weak" or "insecure", then so be it. I won't apologize for it.

1/19/2011 9:16:08 AM

ALkatraz
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Quote :
"If a girl sleeps with 1000 guys, she's a whore.

If a guy sleeps with 1000 girls, he's a god.

If a guy has never had sex with a girl, it's probably ."


If a man builds 1000 bridges and sucks 1 cock.

He's not a bridge builder, he's a cocksucker.

1/19/2011 9:16:49 AM

Exiled
Eyes up here ^^
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So Pikey...instead of having a companion that will communicate openly with you about her feelings/desires you'd rather take the chance of her just going ahead an cheating on your without knowing? I would think you'd rather have this open line of communication in ALL of your relationships. That way if it ever comes up that the woman you're with wants to have sex with another man you can know that its time to sever that tie and move on. Sure its painful and heartbreaking and all that jazz but in the end what you've learned from that experience will help you to know more about what you're looking for.

1/19/2011 9:41:01 AM

Lumex
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My GF wants me to have a threesome with her and another girl, with the stipulation that I am not allowed to fuck or give too much attention to the other girl. Under those circumstances, I think it would be more hassle than fun.

Rgarding openness: I think a lot of women have few enough "ugly thoughts" that they can get away with being 100% honest about their feelings. When I say "ugly thoughts" I mean stuff like "damn that chick has junk I want to funk", "your cellulite looks like a topography map of Utah", "Stop talking, I can't hear my video game", and "you're my silver medal"; things that should just not be shared. These are problems that most men can live with, and most women can't.

1/19/2011 9:53:25 AM

Pikey
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I want to communicate openly about everything with my wife. I just want it to be very clear for the both of us that the desire to act on sleeping with anyone else is a deal breaker. What good is an open line of communication if you know beforehand that this certain conversation will result in the end of your relationship?

Quote :
"That way if it ever comes up..."

It would not come up in one of my relationships because this sentiment would have been set out early on. Much like everyone has already discussed about being on the same page.

1/19/2011 9:56:38 AM

Exiled
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That's ridiculously niaeve of you. It a known fact that people and relationships change. Sometimes things can not be helped, its a chance you take in all relationships. There's always a "just in case." You'll have to be prepared for that someday, my friend.

V Meant that it was a little more niaeve of him to think that it wouldn't happen because it was discussed at the beginning of the relationship. The ending it part is perfectly reasonable.

[Edited on January 19, 2011 at 10:12 AM. Reason : update]

1/19/2011 10:03:40 AM

aea
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It sounds like he is prepared. His "answer" (for lack of a better word) to that situation is ending the relationship. And if both people in the relationship know and accept that this is how he views it, then there is nothing wrong with it. I may not agree, but it doesn't sound naive really, just stubborn. And like ^ mentioned, people change. Maybe if, one day, she said "I am thinking I might want to sleep with so-and-so", he may not immediately end it.

1/19/2011 10:06:52 AM

Biofreak70
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i don't know if it would be an immediate ending, but it would certainly be the beginning of the end if my SO and I were in ^ that scenario (either one of us saying we wanted to sleep with someone else)

1/19/2011 10:09:35 AM

aea
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I don't know for sure how I'd react. My self-esteem is pretty terrible already, and that would be a nasty blow for me. But at the same time, I'd really want to know why and, if possible, what I could do to fix it.

When it comes down to it, I would much rather hear him say "I want to [...]" than to find out, from him or somebody else, that he has already slept with another woman. You can't take back the action, but you can work on the temptations or feelings.

1/19/2011 10:13:48 AM

jbrick83
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Quote :
"My GF wants me to have a threesome with her and another girl, with the stipulation that I am not allowed to fuck or give too much attention to the other girl. Under those circumstances, I think it would be more hassle than fun."


Sounds like your girl is half-lesbo but still wants to keep you around so she's going to let you watch and touch the girl's nipple once every five minutes.

[Edited on January 19, 2011 at 10:16 AM. Reason : .]

1/19/2011 10:15:55 AM

Biofreak70
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true.. and I guess it would also depend on who it was. If it was like the dude from twilight or something, then i wouldn't have an issue with it. But if it were one of our friends or an ex of hers, then I wouldn't know how I would take that

1/19/2011 10:16:19 AM

jbrick83
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I don't know how I would feel about hearing it. I pretty much want to fuck every girl I'm attracted to, but I don't because I have a girlfriend that I love. My problem would be that I don't know how girls are on the same subject. I'm sure there are girls that want to have a different dick in them at all times, but I don't think that's the status quo. So I would think that if my SO has seriously been thinking about fucking another guy, then something's probably wrong. I guess I would like to know so that I can try to do something to stop her thinking about that guy (bring a sex swing/midget into the bedroom)...and if not, then we might have to re-evaluate the relationship.

It would not be the ender to a relationship...but it would be a decent sized hump that we would have to get over.

1/19/2011 10:21:56 AM

sparky
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Quote :
"I pretty much want to fuck every girl I'm attracted to, but I don't because I have a girlfriend that I love."


i think that's true for a lot of people male and female. yes girls fantasize about being with other dudes just like guys fantasize about being with other girls. its natural but we don't act on it out of respect for our loved ones. however there are circumstances where acting on these desires is acceptable if trust is maintained.

1/19/2011 10:32:47 AM

richthofen
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^, ^^I have been given the impression that sex for women has a lot more to do with emotion, so I would presume that cheating for a women is much more likely an indicator of serious trouble with the relationship than the male case of just an extracurricular fuck. But of course that's not going to be the situation for all of them. Hell, not being a woman myself, I may be completely wrong.

[Edited on January 19, 2011 at 10:37 AM. Reason : d]

1/19/2011 10:36:44 AM

Fareako
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Quote :
"My GF wants me to have a threesome with her and another girl, with the stipulation that I am not allowed to fuck or give too much attention to the other girl. Under those circumstances, I think it would be more hassle than fun."


She sounds lame as fuck.

1/19/2011 10:42:04 AM

sparky
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maybe some women can chime in here but i think that's a gross over generalization. i know several women who can engage in a purely physical sexual experience as well as carry on an ongoing no strings attached sexual relationship with out getting emotions involved. some chicks just think of fucking as fucking. i would consider an emotional sexual relationship outside of the marriage as cheating but a purely physical one is different.

1/19/2011 10:46:13 AM

Tarun
almost
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is this thread a promo for the new flick No Strings Attached?

buy an ad

1/19/2011 10:48:00 AM

jbrick83
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^^I would just say that on average more men "fuck to fuck" than women do. Not saying that there aren't plenty of women out there that can consistently fuck without emotion...just saying that its probably significantly less than men. Out of my "hook-ups" in the past 7 or 8 years...10 to 20% of the girls didn't want anything afterwards.

[Edited on January 19, 2011 at 10:48 AM. Reason : .]

1/19/2011 10:48:33 AM

Lumex
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^^^^ She really just wants to spice up her sex life, and I'm not really into anything freaky.

Also, fuck off.

[Edited on January 19, 2011 at 10:52 AM. Reason : .]

1/19/2011 10:52:06 AM

jbrick83
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Quote :
"She really just wants to spice up her sex life, and I'm not really into anything freaky."


Just a forewarning that this will end up with her eventually having sex with just the girl without you present. If you're okay with that, then that's cool.

1/19/2011 10:59:14 AM

ThePeter
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She wants to spice up her sex life, not yours

also ^

1/19/2011 10:59:58 AM

Str8BacardiL
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Quote :
"i think in a perfect world Pikey's view is a good one. his view reflects the views of many devout religious people and it works for them. "


whatever, you know those guys probably staring at some 23 year old girl wearing a tight dress in church the second she bends over to pick something up (possibly feeling guilty but doing it nonetheless)

I think when people pretend we are not living creatures that are pre-programmed to want sexual gratification (quantity and quality) they are only trying to fool themselves. That desire is going to be there, how you deal with it in life is what makes the difference.

The difference between humans and most animals is that we have a much better ability to evaluate the consequences of decisions we make. (i.e. This new girl at work would probably fuck me with little to no effort on my part, and it would feel good, man back in the day I woullda been all over that) Further evaluation would reveal that "oh yeah I have a wife/gf/fiance at home that cares about me, is just as attractive, less psycho, and I look forward to seeing and talking to her her when I get home, etc, etc. Im lucky to have her and do not wanna fuck that up by any means.

Just because the new girl at work would do you (and you would enjoy it) does not mean you are gonna fuck around and ruin a meaningful/deep/longstanding relationship. It also does not make you a horrible person for knowing that or even debating it in your mind.

The difference is you also know that acting on those things would ruin something that means more to you and hurt someone you care for.

1/19/2011 11:09:19 AM

piddlebug
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^ yes.

1/19/2011 11:16:39 AM

Skwinkle
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I think that's what people were meaning with the whole "considering cheating" thing at the start of the thread. When you stop thinking, "I am not going to do this because it would jeopardize my solid, fulfilling relationship," and instead start with, "Well, there's probably no chance she'd find out ..."

maybe. I could be wrong.

1/19/2011 11:20:17 AM

Pikey
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I think people ITT are getting twisted "thinking someone is hot" vs seriously considering engaging in sex with someone else while in a monogamous relationship.





[Edited on January 19, 2011 at 11:28 AM. Reason : qq]

1/19/2011 11:27:49 AM

Fareako
Shitter Pilot
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Quote :
"^^^^ She really just wants to spice up her sex life, and I'm not really into anything freaky.

Also, fuck off."


I meant she sounds lame as fuck because she is having all the fun and you just get to watch her have all the fun. That sounds lame as fuck and I'd fuck the other girl if I were you just because she (your g/f) is being a selfish cunt and making up stupid rules and stipulations to this "threesome".

My point is: she is clearly not ok with the idea of a threesome and just wants to lez out without 'cheating' by calling it a threesome.

[Edited on January 19, 2011 at 11:38 AM. Reason : moar]

1/19/2011 11:31:47 AM

Lumex
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Quote :
"Just a forewarning that this will end up with her eventually having sex with just the girl without you present. If you're okay with that, then that's cool."


Quote :
"she is clearly not ok with the idea of a threesome and just wants to lez out without 'cheating' by calling it a threesome."


Its not one girl in particular, and she isn't attracted to other people. She just wants more sex than I do, and she thinks this will motivate my libido. Granted, she doesn't want me having sex with another girl, but that doesn't make her lame. It just makes a 3some very difficult to execute.

1/19/2011 11:44:24 AM

jbrick83
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Your gf sounds retarded then. There are other ways to motivate a libido than bringing an extra person into bed.

I hope you're not too serious about this relationship, because it's not going to last long unless you decide that you just need to give your girl a little more dick so she doesn't go searching for someone else's.

1/19/2011 11:48:16 AM

Lumex
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I'm just gonna stop cus apparently I am not communicating here effectively and I don't need a whole page about my GF.

Lets just leave it at "I dont' give my girlfriend enough dick."

[Edited on January 19, 2011 at 11:55 AM. Reason : .]

1/19/2011 11:54:18 AM

qntmfred
retired
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i like how everybody itt thinks they know what is and is not appropriate for other peoples relationships

1/19/2011 11:57:18 AM

bmel
l3md
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^ TWW is all-knowing, everyone knows that.

1/19/2011 12:19:34 PM

McDanger
All American
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Quote :
"i like how everybody itt thinks they know what is and is not appropriate for other peoples relationships"


These issues are inherently subjective, but given that people can change their beliefs and attitudes over time, discussing what might be better for somebody else is open game

1/19/2011 12:27:00 PM

qntmfred
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sure but i'm not talking about the people who are discussing what might be better for somebody else. i'm talking about the people who think they know what is better for somebody else, and feel the need to disparage others for whatever type(s) of relationship they currently pursue

1/19/2011 12:38:41 PM

Supplanter
supple anteater
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Before getting involved in an open relationship with lots of partners, its important to consider the parable of the really gross used tooth brush:

1/19/2011 12:38:50 PM

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