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 Message Boards » » Is kissing someone who isn't your SO, cheating? Page 1 2 3 4 [5], Prev  
TreeTwista10
minisoldr
148457 Posts
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5 pages of indecent proposals

8/15/2013 4:01:20 PM

Krallum
56A0D3
15294 Posts
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I flirt with qntmfred in the mod forum quite a bit

I'm Krallum and I approved this message.

8/15/2013 4:02:38 PM

terpball
All American
22489 Posts
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I used to flirt quite a bit back when I didn't really care so much for the girl who I was dating. Not like I hated them, I just knew we weren't in it for the long haul.

8/15/2013 4:14:27 PM

jbrick83
All American
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Definitely selfish reasons...but every now and then I would flirt just to know that I still "had it." Got to keep that ego high and tight!!

8/15/2013 4:18:40 PM

terpball
All American
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You mean girls aren't constantly throwing themselves at you? If you were a boss like me then your ego would be all Kanye West-like.

8/15/2013 4:20:10 PM

jbrick83
All American
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I don't run into enough girls for them to throw themselves at me. I'm grown up...work, play with the dog, play with the fiancee. Sleep, rinse, repeat.

8/15/2013 4:21:45 PM

terpball
All American
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Yeah I guess I'm pretty much there too, except without the whole family part.

8/15/2013 4:23:44 PM

ncsuallday
Sink the Flagship
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Quote :
"My viewpoint is that trust and respect are paramount in a relationship and if both people are happy, you shouldn't be worried your SO is going to cheat on you because they flirt with someone else occasionally."


My point is that it is disrespectful to the relationship and your partner to flirt, not that it stems from a fear of cheating. It's not like if I caught my gf flirting I'd up and kick her ass to the curb, but I would be offended.

Also, somebody asked what I consider flirting, which is really tough to put a clear-cut definition on but generally I'd say it's knowingly giving any indication that you would be interested in somebody sexually, or expressing that they could have you sexually if they wanted. Essentially, any invitation to pursue things on a more than friend basis with you is welcomed. This is multiplied by physical contact.

"hey you look nice today" "thanks, you too!" - not flirting
"hey you look really sexy in that dress" "thanks!, you're pretty sexy yourself" - flirting.

like I said it depends on the situation but you know god damn well when you're flirting and when others are flirting with you.

8/15/2013 4:28:00 PM

Skwinkle
burritotomyface
19447 Posts
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Do you think the people in a relationship get to decide what qualifies as disrespectful for their own relationship?

8/15/2013 4:32:07 PM

ncsuallday
Sink the Flagship
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of course they do, I don't care what people do in their relationships if it makes them happy. however, that doesn't mean that agree with it personally. to each their own. I was simply expressing how I view those situations.

8/15/2013 4:36:16 PM

acraw
All American
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Quote :
"Yeah some people are making 'attention whoring' or 'validation' out to be some sort of pathology.

I'm sure when all of you go out, you're not trying to look so messy either. It's the same thing."



Quote :
"Wait... what?"


I am just saying that we all have some mild level of exhibitionism, and it's not necessarily a bad thing. When we go out, we make more effort to look our best, if it wasn't for the public than who are we trying to look good for? And if you are in a relationship, you already know your partner is attracted to you, so who are you trying to look good for?

Has nothing to do with flirting and cheating, I know. It was just a response to sparky's 'attention whoring'

8/15/2013 7:33:10 PM

eleusis
All American
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^are you implying that you dress nice for other people when you go out and not because of concern for your SO?

8/15/2013 9:01:35 PM

qntmsister
poneapple
1282 Posts
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^zing

8/15/2013 11:00:07 PM

Ragged
All American
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When I go out I just don't want to look like a "people of Walmart" picture nor do I want to look like I don't give a shit about being in a social gathering

8/15/2013 11:04:05 PM

acraw
All American
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Well, humans are social creatures. Being on the receiving end of flirting or public attention or adoration is sort of refilling your ego or confidence. Any stimulus, really, whether it's a compliment for a job well done from your boss at work, your friend complimenting on how great your cooking was, to a stranger telling you how cute your baby is, or generally doing something nice for someone. It's part of that reward center in our brain that releases that "feel good" chemical we all know as dopamine.

As far as getting this from your significant other...sure, it's nice, but there is a difference between "old" attention and "new" attention. I think our brains light up from the "newness" of something.

I think this is the reason why people stray in relationships too. Most people intentionally seek outside of their relationship, but the new guy or girl flirting or giving you attention makes you feel good and that reward center lights up and you want it.

That's more of what I wanted to explain to the people who are saying that it's "daddy issues" or some sort of pathology.

8/15/2013 11:48:48 PM

UJustWait84
All American
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Quote :
"Any stimulus, really, whether it's a compliment for a job well done from your boss at work, your friend complimenting on how great your cooking was, to a stranger telling you how cute your baby is, or generally doing something nice for someone. It's part of that reward center in our brain that releases that "feel good" chemical we all know as dopamine. "


yeah but being praised for something you do is different than being praised for looking hot.

you can convince yourself otherwise if you want, but there's a huge difference between wanting to be appreciated/liked and wanting people to want you.

8/16/2013 1:57:53 AM

ssclark
Black and Proud
14179 Posts
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in short, yes

8/16/2013 3:05:45 AM

adultswim
Suspended
8379 Posts
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Quote :
"yeah but being praised for something you do is different than being praised for looking hot. "


isn't looking good something you do though? you go to the gym, you dress nice, you get your hair did, etc

8/16/2013 8:01:30 AM

Krallum
56A0D3
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I'm Krallum and I approved this message.

8/16/2013 3:36:22 PM

ComputerGuy
(IN)Sensitive
5052 Posts
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It's alright for me to kiss other ladies lips, but if that dirty skank kisses another dude, it's fucking over!

8/16/2013 3:52:36 PM

qntmsister
poneapple
1282 Posts
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8/20/2013 12:22:08 PM

jbrick83
All American
23447 Posts
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Quote :
"Just fuck the dude and get it over with.
"

8/20/2013 12:30:01 PM

djeternal
Bee Hugger
62661 Posts
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^^ lol

8/20/2013 12:32:25 PM

qntmsister
poneapple
1282 Posts
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^^

^

8/20/2013 12:36:57 PM

adultswim
Suspended
8379 Posts
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Quote :
"Just fuck the dude and get it over with."

8/20/2013 1:36:46 PM

qntmsister
poneapple
1282 Posts
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8/20/2013 1:39:50 PM

MinkaGrl01

21814 Posts
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Just blow the dude and get it over with.

8/20/2013 1:46:41 PM

ncsuallday
Sink the Flagship
9818 Posts
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disagree, don't cheat it's not worth it.

[Edited on August 20, 2013 at 3:13 PM. Reason : fdt to tww instead.]

8/20/2013 3:12:56 PM

Roflpack
All American
1966 Posts
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prob so

8/20/2013 6:21:27 PM

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