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 Message Boards » » Has cheating on your SO become the social norm ? Page 1 2 3 [4] 5 6 7 8 9, Prev Next  
stategrad100
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^ ^ Right, because the Dad was on your side and really wanted what was best for you....his daughter be-damned right? Maybe he didn't like you.

Hate to say it, but that's the hardest thing to acknowledge. Your SO's parents are NEVER your friends.


And ftw:
Quote :
"shit, i wish girls were doing mcguyver-type shit to fuck me"
....still lolzing

1/17/2011 1:47:43 PM

SaabTurbo
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Quote :
""asshole" is in the eye of the beholder"


I behold many of these.

1/17/2011 1:47:59 PM

The5thsoth
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....

[Edited on January 17, 2011 at 1:48 PM. Reason : post all jacked...]

1/17/2011 1:48:03 PM

ThePeter
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Quote :
"Right, because the Dad was on your side and really wanted what was best for you....his daughter be-damned right? Maybe he didn't like you."


I've had a friend that had a SO's father take his side when the girl attacked him with knives, so I wouldn't think its that uncommon. Perhaps more when a daddy recognizes his girl is batshit and the guy is a decent fellow.

1/17/2011 1:51:42 PM

SaabTurbo
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What kind of knives?

1/17/2011 1:52:10 PM

The5thsoth
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sometimes its just easier to relate to the boyfriend than your daughter when she is known for being bonkers.

1/17/2011 1:53:10 PM

ThePeter
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Maybe throwing knives? That or just kitchen knives she was throwing. They both were martial artists and got into an argument near the kitchen

1/17/2011 1:53:33 PM

stategrad100
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all this talk of family feuds involving karate and macgyver-esque breakins is starting to make me reconsider how I am spending my time...I am obviously missing out

1/17/2011 1:59:54 PM

LunaK
LOSER :(
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i don't ever want to be cheated on (although I may have been cheated on in one of my relationships, just don't know for sure) so i don't cheat. i feel like karma will always come around.

1/17/2011 2:02:33 PM

SaabTurbo
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^^ You should definitely be spending more time collecting knives. All this talk of knives has me wanting to buy some knives.

[Edited on January 17, 2011 at 2:08 PM. Reason : t]

1/17/2011 2:08:14 PM

jethromoore
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Quote :
"I find it hard to believe that all these holier-than-thou women ITT say they are never even tempted to cheat while in a fulfilling relationship."


I think the whole "temptation" argument is just semantics based on what temptation means to you. By my definition there needs to be an urge present in order for there to be temptation. So if you are truly tempted then you are feeling urges that are not being fulfilled in the relationship (IMO). Imagine an average Joe that is somehow in a bank vault, now imagine he somehow knows he has a 50/50 shot of being able to walk out with all the money he can carry with no repercussions (but on the flip side he could get caught and go to jail). Now imagine Bill Gates or some other rich person in the same situation. Sure there is probably some rich fucker that would chance it (they got/stayed rich somehow and it wasn't by passing up opportunities) but for the most part it's not even going to register on the urge-o-meter.

So while I know that I could cheat on my wife and possibly get away with it, I have no urge to do so, regardless of hotness of the broad. Don't get me wrong, I am still aroused by women that aren't my wife, but there is absolutely no urge to actually sex them. I get that becoming aroused is possibly an inherent "urge" on some primal level or something and therefore could be "temptation", but I don't really consider it that way. It'd be pretty asinine to say the rich guy in the previously stated hypothetical is resisting temptation to not risk years in prison for an amount of money his checking account accrues in a single day's interest, just because he likes money. Just like it would be asinine for me to think my wife is resisting the urge to cheat just because she finds another man attractive or for her to think the same of me when she sees me staring at some titties that aren’t hers.

In my mind if you are resisting the temptation to cheat, then you want to cheat but then decide otherwise. The wanting to cheat part is the root of the problem and it's indicative of your attitude towards your partner and relationship regardless of how bad you feel after the fact. I say this as somebody that has been cheated on and been a cheater in the past.

[Edited on January 17, 2011 at 2:13 PM. Reason : oh yeah tl;dr knives are cool]

1/17/2011 2:11:41 PM

SaabTurbo
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Woah, TL/DR.

1/17/2011 2:12:05 PM

khcadwal
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TL;DR

i have never cheated. in my sense of the word anyway, since there are a lot of definitions ITT.

still not sure what "wanting to cheat" means really.

i just don't get the point of cheating. i mean i get that you are unfulfilled in your relationship but if that is the case why are you even still in it? i dunno...that type of stuff is kinda black and white for me. i don't like people wasting my time so if i am unhappy in a situation i'm not going to stay in it and bullshit around. i'm either going to be like "here is the problem we need to fix it like asap" or "ok its broken, BYE"

but that is probably just me being selfish and not wanting to partake in something that doesn't make me happy.

i also don't buy the nice guy/asshole extreme thing. sure there are extremes, but most people i've dated have been in the middle. i've never ended a relationship on a bad note. maybe i'm a psycho, but...i haven't.

[Edited on January 17, 2011 at 2:23 PM. Reason : .]

1/17/2011 2:14:48 PM

Stimwalt
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It's easier to be mean to the opposite sex, and then ask for forgiveness for said meanness, rather than be nice and be forgotten by the opposite sex.

Tucker Max philosophy on women (Asshole 101)

VV

[Edited on January 17, 2011 at 2:27 PM. Reason : -]

1/17/2011 2:17:37 PM

The5thsoth
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it simply means to be unfulfilled.

aka unhappy with the current situation.

1/17/2011 2:18:00 PM

th3oretecht
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^^wat

1/17/2011 2:18:38 PM

The5thsoth
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^^^Epic sociopathic statement ITT

1/17/2011 2:21:48 PM

Stimwalt
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Definitely old, but full of remorseless asshole-ish philosophies on women.

http://www.tuckermax.com

1/17/2011 2:47:12 PM

IRSeriousCat
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khcadwal I understand your confusion, so maybe I can shine some light on things for you.

Quote :
"i just don't get the point of cheating. i mean i get that you are unfulfilled in your relationship"


it isn't that you are completely unfulfilled in your relationship, as much as it is that you just want to bone. The wonderful thing about personality is that the nature of it is so complex that a personal can be stellar in one category while being entirely defunct in another. People see different value in each of these categories. There are circumstances where a man realizes that the woman he is with is reasonable with money, has a strong moral fiber, is caring and is educated so she'll likely be a good mother of his children and life mate. However, this same girl may be boring in bed and not offer him the excitement he needs in that area. A guy can acknowledge that it is to his advantage to keep the mate with the other characteristics but this does not eliminate his need for a quality romp session. Sure, he could break it off with the girl and find a new one, but the odds of finding a woman who fits all those other categories and can offer what he needs in bed is very low. This is because, in women, sexual capability is often inversely correlated with mate potential.

1/17/2011 3:02:56 PM

walkmanfades
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Quote :
"Sure, he could break it off with the girl and find a new one, but the odds of finding a woman who fits all those other categories and can offer what he needs in bed is very low. This is because, in women, sexual capability is often inversely correlated with mate potential."


Exactly. It's like you read my mind.

1/17/2011 3:07:36 PM

Skwinkle
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Even if mate-girl is good in bed, there's something more exciting about getting with someone you've never been with before than hitting it for the 2,000th time, I would imagine.

1/17/2011 3:10:18 PM

khcadwal
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right. which is why i, from the female perspective, do not understand why other females would want to cheat.

the male desire...not that complicated. figured that one out on my own. but the reasons women cheat seem to be more complex. and possibly vindictive.

[Edited on January 17, 2011 at 3:18 PM. Reason : m]

1/17/2011 3:12:14 PM

Fareako
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^^

1/17/2011 3:13:30 PM

The5thsoth
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womenz be trifilin

1/17/2011 3:15:56 PM

takeitback
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if you do find out a woman has been cheating on their SO (whether once or multiple times) does it change your perception of that person?

would your perception of a guy who cheats often change too?

1/17/2011 3:27:49 PM

ThePeter
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if its someone i don't know, then that person is a lying sack of shit

if its someone i do know then it depends on the circumstances

1/17/2011 3:28:56 PM

SaabTurbo
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^^ No and no.

[Edited on January 17, 2011 at 3:29 PM. Reason : t]

1/17/2011 3:29:11 PM

takeitback
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^^ so if it's someone that you've known for a while, you wouldn't still think they were a lying sack of shit?

interesting

1/17/2011 3:30:59 PM

ThePeter
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depends on the relationship. if its a good friend then they're going to get benefit of the doubt...granted I don't keep sacks of shit around to be my friend, they get tossed to the curb.

if its someone i kind of know, then they're more likely to get redefined.

1/17/2011 3:32:48 PM

IRSeriousCat
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Quote :
"if you do find out a woman has been cheating on their SO (whether once or multiple times) does it change your perception of that person?"


yes, it makes me want to call her up.

1/17/2011 3:33:30 PM

Stimwalt
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Quote :
"if you do find out a woman has been cheating on their SO (whether once or multiple times) does it change your perception of that person?"


They would lose any "relationship" potential, and it would weaken certain aspects of their perceived character/integrity.

Quote :
"would your perception of a guy who cheats often change too?"


It would weaken certain aspects of their perceived character/integrity.

1/17/2011 3:34:14 PM

ssjamind
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call me old fashioned, but no, it has not become the norm

1/17/2011 3:42:56 PM

twoozles
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Quote :
"In my mind if you are resisting the temptation to cheat, then you want to cheat but then decide otherwise. The wanting to cheat part is the root of the problem and it's indicative of your attitude towards your partner and relationship regardless of how bad you feel after the fact. I say this as somebody that has been cheated on and been a cheater in the past."


this is similar to what i believe, glad to see i'm not the only one who understands this.





Quote :
"if you do find out a woman has been cheating on their SO (whether once or multiple times) does it change your perception of that person?"


i immediately want to say yes, it does change my opinion of them, for the negative. however, after knowing several women who have done such i can't say that is actually how i felt. i didn't know the background of what was going on in the relationship in each of those instances, but i do wonder why all of them stayed in those relationships when they were seemingly unfulfilled.

1/17/2011 3:43:09 PM

Skwinkle
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I wouldn't want to continue a friendship with someone who actively still cheats on SOs. However, everyone has skeletons and if they have gotten it out of their system and aren't still actively in cheater mode I can get over that.

1/17/2011 3:45:41 PM

twoozles
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i understand that. i feel strange continuing my friendship with one individual in particular, even though we have been friends for a very long time. it's a touchy subject and one i have to approach in just the right manner, which is why i usually just ignore/avoid it

1/17/2011 3:47:37 PM

takeitback
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i've had to end a few friendships over it - i couldn't condone the behavior and i knew i couldn't stop them.

men and women

1/17/2011 3:48:54 PM

GGMon
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Unless you experience it - you will never understand the sexual thrill of cheating.

1/17/2011 3:50:13 PM

ALkatraz
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Quote :
"In my mind if you are resisting the temptation to cheat, then you want to cheat but then decide otherwise. The wanting to cheat part is the root of the problem and it's indicative of your attitude towards your partner and relationship regardless of how bad you feel after the fact. I say this as somebody that has been cheated on and been a cheater in the past."


In my mind, if you are in a relationship and once in a while you think about getting with another girl but never do then you've done nothing wrong and are normal. There is no problem.

If you are in a relationship and you often think about getting with someone else, then yes, you need to analyze your current relationship status and decide if it's best to end it or figure out what's wrong.

I say this as someone who hasn't been cheated on and has not cheated on someone.

1/17/2011 3:50:40 PM

grimx
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Quote :
"I wouldn't want to continue a friendship with someone who actively still cheats on SOs."


this

1/17/2011 3:51:03 PM

SaabTurbo
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Oh, I would.

1/17/2011 3:51:40 PM

LunaK
LOSER :(
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Quote :
"In my mind, if you are in a relationship and once in a while you think about getting with another girl but never do then you've done nothing wrong and are normal."

1/17/2011 3:51:42 PM

khcadwal
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Quote :
""In my mind, if you are in a relationship and once in a while you think about getting with another girl but never do then you've done nothing wrong and are normal.""


agreed.

1/17/2011 3:52:42 PM

DJ Lauren
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I don't see how anyone could argue with that ^^.

1/17/2011 3:53:23 PM

grimx
#maketwwgreatagain
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i have heard lately about more women that have intent in plans to quit with the bjs and cut back on sex after marriage. and i can only think that perpetuates the whole significant other cheating....

1/17/2011 4:00:01 PM

McDanger
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Quote :
"i think nice guys sometimes fall into the friend category rather quickly... "


Based on my own observations and faulty generalizations, it seems to me that a lot of women overuse the whole "friend" thing to the point of not understanding what the word means anymore. A friend is not somebody who you manipulate based solely on asymmetric sexual desire to bail your ass out of each and every last predicament that requires the exertion of effort

Quote :
"They both were martial artists and got into an argument near the kitchen"


This would explain why nobody was hurt

[Edited on January 17, 2011 at 4:03 PM. Reason : .]

1/17/2011 4:02:56 PM

twoozles
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i think a lot of us are saying similar things in different words and accusing each other of being wrong

oh well

1/17/2011 4:03:09 PM

grimx
#maketwwgreatagain
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you're wrong meg!

i think a lot of us are just miscommunicating the same idea

1/17/2011 4:04:10 PM

PackPrincess
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4^That's sad. A relationship is not like fishing. You can't hook'em with a two handed deep throat bj and then cut them off and throw them in a bucket, sad and neglected.

It's more like beekeeping. You have to nurture them, coddle them, give them an environment that they want to come home to, over and over again.

At least that's how I feel.

[Edited on January 17, 2011 at 4:04 PM. Reason : slow cat is slow]

1/17/2011 4:04:20 PM

SaabTurbo
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I don't keep bees.....

1/17/2011 4:04:58 PM

AndyMac
All American
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Beekeeping isn't all that hard.

You just give them a freaking box to live in, then you drug them and steal all their shit.

1/17/2011 4:08:13 PM

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