me two

7/26/2007 7:42:17 PM

I've pooped twice today and I STILL feel like I didn't get everything out. GD #1 type shits too, feels like I'm firing paint balls out of my ass.

7/26/2007 7:43:49 PM

i take about 3-5 shits a day.

7/26/2007 7:45:48 PM

I took a huge shit last friday. That was one of those full pushes where you keep pushing poo out and then it happened 2 more times. I think I cleared out my whole digestive system in one go. It was AWESOME.

7/26/2007 8:20:17 PM

^^

took 2 yesterday and one today

7/26/2007 8:22:39 PM

just had a 4/5 combo...more 5 than 4...

7/29/2007 3:35:45 PM

This thread is awesome.

7/29/2007 5:27:40 PM

just had a 1, 2, 3 combo....had the pebbles and (hard to pass) of a number 1, but a few of the pebbles looked like 2 and 3

8/3/2007 6:35:15 PM

I think I'm gonna go poop now. I just farted and its making my eyes sting

8/3/2007 6:38:32 PM

Great thread. I've been pissing out my ass today. Seems to happen every time I go eat at Betski's. Great food, but I'm not used to eating such stuff. Maybe the Klosterbier did it.

8/3/2007 8:02:27 PM

^so 6.5 or full blown 7?

8/3/2007 8:04:09 PM

About a 6.5 to 6.75

8/3/2007 8:05:17 PM

lucky you...anything is better than a 7...i'd rather have a 1 and strain a lot than have a 7

8/3/2007 8:07:57 PM

Canonball poops again. what's weird is I've been eating BETTER lately.

DUBBA TEE EFF MATERS???

8/5/2007 10:49:25 PM

I had a type 4 followed by a type 6 this afternoon. Wasnt nice at ALL.

8/5/2007 10:51:53 PM

http://www.poopreport.com/


best website about shitting on the net.

8/5/2007 10:53:56 PM

8/5/2007 10:58:56 PM

what a n00b!

8/5/2007 10:59:36 PM

10/10 FOR BEING THE DUMBEST THREAD EVER. COMEDIC PROPORTIONS HERE.

8/5/2007 11:29:01 PM

Quote :

"I work on the second level of a three-story building. With about forty people in our company, we have the whole floor to ourselves. Unfortunately, the women's bathroom only has two stalls in it, and all of the chicks I work with are girly girls. Outside of my home and close friends and family, I am a Shameful Shitter. I was doing well with this until I switched jobs and took one look at my female co-workers. I would not be sharing any fun poop stories with these chicks. I eat a lot of fiber and am rewarded with monstrous, poophoria-inducing poops. Luckily our cramped office bathrooms have super flush toilets that blast them to hell every single time, so I never have to worry about further shame from a clogged toilet. But there is a drawback to these wonderful poops: limited warning. At best, I get ten minutes to schedule a trip. At worst, I get two. I was overloaded with work one day when I got my two-minute warning. I stretched the two minutes into five, but when I got the "I said NOW!" I all but ran to the bathroom. But someone was in there, so I performed a stealthy retreat. I tried to go back to work, but I couldn't concentrate. I saw a chick come back in the office, so I hurried back out into the hall and almost kicked open the door, only to find another chick from the other side of the office in there. I was torn with indecision. I could go in anyway, but I knew my colon would sooner explode than let loose with someone in the stall next to me. So I turned around and started to head back toward my cube. But when I passed the door for the stairs, I hit the brakes. "Screw this!" I said to myself, and ran down the stairs to the first floor bathroom. I'd never used it before, but at least I wouldn't know anyone else who might be using it. I burst through the door and into the first stall I could get to. No one was in there. Fate was on my side. I let loose before my cheeks even met the seat. Barely fifteen seconds passed and I was done. I felt better, but cheated. All that trauma for nothing? When I stood up and viewed the monster I had unleashed upon the world, a pride-filled smile spread across my face. I would have taken a picture with my camera phone, but I'd left it at my desk. This baby was over a foot long and probably two-and-a-half inches across. I'd never seen anything so beautiful. I almost hated to say good-bye, but I had work to get back to work. So I waved and pressed the flusher. But these were not the super blaster toilets from upstairs. I held my breath. The water started to move -- and then my turd violated that poor, wretched excuse for a toilet. I looked to the left and there was a plunger. At first I was relieved. But then I was angry -- I should have known that any public toilet that has a plunger primed and ready to go will never be able to take on one of my poops. I grabbed that thing and plunged my heart out as the water nearly crested the rim. I must have flushed four times, making almost no progress. I thought to myself, "While this is bad, at least no one has come in." And then I heard a heavenly 3-2-1 countdown, and then the laughter of the gods boomed down at me: the door creaked open and someone entered the stall next to mine. I couldn't plunge with someone in the next stall -- they would know what happened, and I might be identified. I set aside the plunger, gave it one final, hopeless flush, and tore ass out of the bathroom without even washing my hands. One phrase went through my head as I suppressed hysterical laughter and ran upstairs: "Abandon ship! Abandon ship!" "

HAHAHA

8/5/2007 11:41:18 PM

my old roommate told me hers were like type 1, she said she pooped like a rabbit

mine are usually 4 occasionally 5 or 3

8/5/2007 11:42:41 PM

^^

more like

Quote :

""Abandon ship shit! Abandon ship shit!"

8/5/2007 11:48:07 PM

[Edited on August 5, 2007 at 11:56 PM. Reason : .]

8/5/2007 11:49:08 PM

8/6/2007 12:00:30 AM

just had a long type 4 with light to medium brown hue....was such a fulfilling shit

8/12/2007 10:57:01 AM

you woulda loved Log_Jam dnl. he posted pics, and somehow made it interesting.

as for me, i don't love shitting. and i dont get the people who have time to read and all that, unless they're just trying to stretch their potty breaks out.

i remember once i supervised a chick who would take literally 45 minute bathroom breaks at the worst times. and i never had any other girls i could send in after her to make sure she wasnt in there like smoking weed on the job or anything like that. she would just come out and go back to work like nothing ever happened, and of course no one would say anything to her.

even my supervisors would come to me and be like "have you asked her yet?? i dont know what the fuck i would do!"

hahaha. i'm in and out, no time to read.

PS - if you like your poop breaks dont get addicted to opiates. i never really KNEW what constipation was until i was hooked on that shit back in the day. its not like you have to go and you cant.... its like you just dont go for days, and then when you do, its the most painful (0.75 on the bristol scale) thing EVER. literally have to take a couple of painkillers just to take a shit

thats how powerful painkiller addiction is. bet you never thought someone wanted your percocet just so they could take a shit without crying.

HA HA

8/12/2007 11:12:01 AM

lol...i posted a few pics once but of course everyone got all uppity...

8/12/2007 11:23:16 AM

I suffered a pistachio addiction recently. That shit was green for days, B.

8/12/2007 11:23:52 AM

Quote :

"thats how powerful painkiller addiction is. bet you never thought someone wanted your percocet just so they could take a shit without crying."

Word. I remember when Rex put me on painkillers I had to count backwards from 100 to urinate, and then it felt like fire. I was so conditioned that when I went off the painkillers, I had to convince myself before urnating that it wouldn't hurt.

8/12/2007 4:24:34 PM

Just deposited a nice collection of type 4s.

8/12/2007 4:50:08 PM

Quote :

"PS - if you like your poop breaks dont get addicted to opiates. i never really KNEW what constipation was until i was hooked on that shit back in the day. its not like you have to go and you cant.... its like you just dont go for days, and then when you do, its the most painful (0.75 on the bristol scale) thing EVER. literally have to take a couple of painkillers just to take a shit"

yea that shit was fucking awful... it was like no shit for days then rock hard super dry constipated shit that was uncontrollable once you sat down... most painful shit EVER.

8/12/2007 4:53:01 PM

http://www.superdeluxe.com/sd/contentDetail.do?id=D81F2344BF5AC7BB285D30C6A0E937F8362CF12A4CA810B9

8/12/2007 7:43:00 PM

just got done with my 4th shit since yesterday(new diet i guess!)

today was a 1/4 combo...first one yesterday was a 2, the other 2 yesterday were 3/4 combos

8/15/2007 9:52:33 AM

I used to poop like once every three days, now I poop everyday! Thanks diet!!

8/15/2007 11:25:01 AM

im an in and out shitter also
i get in...handle my bidness and im out

8/15/2007 11:31:58 AM

i am used to the one ply, course toilet paper at work, because i pretty much do 95% of my shitting at work.

8/15/2007 11:33:09 AM

i love taking a nice solid shit, just like releaving feeling

sucks when ur ass doesnt cooperate right and clinches up and breaks the shit off
now u got to wipe for like 12 hours use 5 rolls of toilet paper

or when u done all the shitting u gonna do for the whole day and u flush and one chunk comes back, wat does that one chunk want.

or u ever really got to shit and u sit there and one little pebble shit comes out.
stick ur head up ur ass and say, "is that all the shit im gonna get mother fucka"

8/15/2007 11:33:26 AM

Ahhh...Eddie Murphy doing his impression of himself in high school doing a Richard Pryor impression.

8/15/2007 11:44:32 AM

just got done taking my 2nd dump today...my last 5 dumps have been one wipe dumps cause when you eat healthy apparently it leaves the butthole clean

8/17/2007 1:25:55 PM

man i just had a fucking type 1...def. hard to pass...

10/23/2007 4:26:18 PM

Aaaahhh... just had a nice one, grainy, bulky and firm, in the office bathroom. I've been trying to eat more fiber, like oatmeal or granola cereal with breakfast, and it results in good quality dumps. What's better than getting paid to poop?

10/23/2007 4:37:26 PM

laptop on the shitter ftw!

10/23/2007 4:39:05 PM

Quote :

"lol...i posted a few pics once but of course everyone got all uppity... "

For serious?

[Edited on October 23, 2007 at 4:50 PM. Reason : .]

10/23/2007 4:41:26 PM

I poop three times a day, its like clockwork.

10/23/2007 4:47:13 PM

^^nah...i think one is in the spottings thread

10/23/2007 4:48:17 PM

^^Jesus goddam Christ...I eat a lot of food, but I RARELY shit more than twice!

[Edited on October 23, 2007 at 5:06 PM. Reason : well shit.]

10/23/2007 5:06:02 PM

set em up

10/23/2007 6:40:39 PM

god damn that felt good

10/28/2007 5:15:05 PM

POOP

10/28/2007 5:22:28 PM

Quote :

"i wish i could devote one day a month to shitting and not shit the rest of the month"

AHAHAHAHAHAHA

10/28/2007 5:37:47 PM