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 Message Boards » » Good beggar stories Page 1 [2], Prev  
mildew
Drunk yet Orderly
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Quote :
"Anyway, really your parents should be ashamed. Shit, i can't even imagine what i would do if i heard my child speak like this of underprividged people...of course i can't imagine raising a child who doesen't appriciate their position of priviledge, but that's another story....
"


You should have your fucking tubes tied. You go ahead and teach your kid to dish out a few bucks everytime a hobo approaches and says he needs some cash for his "medicine" or his "grandmothers surgery". That means you have taught him to be either naive or just fucking stupid. But if he comes out of you, then I do not think he'll have much choice in either matter.

Quote :
"Oh boo-hoo, cry me a fucking river, "i'm a poor, broke college student...." "


I could be Bill fucking Gates and I would still not give any of these fuckers a penny so they can go buy a fucking 40.

Quote :
"My god, you guys are spoiled, you actually have the indicency to defend your position of priviledge."

Who the fuck am I supposed to apologize to for being "priviledged"??? It's my fucking fault I won't let a guy on the street SCAM me for my cash?
There's a big difference between helping people less fortunate than you and giving into every fucking asshole who approaches you for money. Wake the fuck up.

5/19/2006 5:53:38 AM

MalikDaMan
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Quote :
"the rest of you guys are assholes. I can't beleive you make fun of homeless people, were you raised by the worst of savages? "


You are possibly one of the most ign'ant people I've ever encountered.

I know what it's like to be homeless, because I was once homeless. But you know what? I don't have sympathy for beggars, because 999 times out of a thousand they are people that can do stuff with their lives.

Your garden-variety nutters? They don't park their asses at street corners or by restaurant drive-throughs or outside of convenience stores asking people for money because they figure they can make more money that way than by actually having to work. The people that do that just don't want to try to better their station in life because they are LAZY and it's EASIER for them to beg than to actually go out and get a paycheck. I can tell you all about "working the sign" or "walking for dollars", because when I lived in a homeless shelter, there were plenty of people that did that shit and would come back to the shelter to brag about how they could pull down at least $250 a day easily (this was back in the early 90s).

Yeah, those are really poor people that deserve our sympathy.

[Edited on May 19, 2006 at 8:31 AM. Reason : Do the world a favor, you dumb bitch--don't breed. The genepool doesn't need more shit in it.]

5/19/2006 8:30:52 AM

darkone
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^ if true, that's some serious ownage

5/19/2006 10:38:27 AM

1
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Quote :
"Anyway, really your parents should be ashamed. Shit, i can't even imagine what i would do if i heard my child speak like this of underprividged people...of course i can't imagine raising a child who doesen't appriciate their position of priviledge, but that's another story...."

get someone else to teach them spelling

[Edited on May 19, 2006 at 11:03 AM. Reason : replied before i saw mildew's post]

5/19/2006 11:01:43 AM

cali_j2004
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man, the whole tone of this thread changed thanks to a stupid bitch. Go join a communist society please. you will see how "great" things work there.

5/19/2006 11:31:15 AM

darkone
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The sad part is that she was/is pretty hot.

5/19/2006 11:40:26 AM

pirate5311
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i don't know what the heck you guys are talking about,

Quote :
"the rest of you guys are assholes. I can't beleive you make fun of homeless people, were you raised by the worst of savages? Seriously, i'm beside myself at how a bunch of rich (you are compared to most people that have ever lived on the planet,) educated kids can be so heartless. Seriously, what is wrong with you? So what if they're gonna use for beer, like you always make the best investment decisions with your money. How can you not want to make someone's day nicer? Especially with all the good stories, hell, these people are trying to give you a good story, I think that deserves reward enough.

You guys have this attitude that homeless people are lazy and stupid, and are only homeless cause they're not trying hard enough. Actually, most homeless people are homeless because they either have mental problems, or due to medical bills they lost their property.

In any case, even if you aren't going to give them money, you should at least be embarrassed enough not to admit it, and furthermore not to brag about it!

/rant.
"


if i could still get it up, that post would have given me a woody. i try to use the "golden rule" (or rawls principles of justice) when deciding whether or not to help out people, but there is a line. the lady that hangs out on the north side of hillsborough street across the street has been there going on SIX YEARS. she can lick my @$$ then roll around in it if she thinks she's getting a red cent out of me. if i see an extended pattern in the panhandling, it's over.

[Edited on May 19, 2006 at 12:42 PM. Reason : .]

5/19/2006 12:41:52 PM

tjoshea
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WOW ENOUGH FLAMING ALREADY

back to the hobo stories

5/19/2006 12:42:50 PM

1
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[no hobo]

5/19/2006 1:06:19 PM

IIDX
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The other day I walked out of the store after getting back about 90 cents in change. Homeless guy comes up to me and says "I know you got change. I can hear it". Without thinking I gave him the change, and started to walk on, lighting up a cigarette. He comes back up and asks for a cigarette. "25 cents a smoke."I told him. He kinda laughed and left after I gave him one.

5/19/2006 1:15:38 PM

E30turbo
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there were tons of bums in the tubes of london (or at least at the entrances)...i would walk around with "change" in my pocket (like 1 and 2 pound coins)..well this was like the 3rd day i was there, before i realized that "hey, this change is worth a bit" and i handed some cat a 2 pound coin...that was like 4 bucks! That guy was really surprised..

In rome there was this 16 year old looking girl breastfeeding her kid in the underground metro...or at least trying to..she kept flingin her boob everywhere.

[Edited on May 19, 2006 at 3:27 PM. Reason : 32]

5/19/2006 3:26:30 PM

backdapack03
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We were up in D.C. one time and a bum comes up to us and asks "Fellas, what's the best nation in the world." And since it was pretty close to when September 11th happened, we figured he was just being patriotic, so all of us are like the USA without a question, thinking this is just a no-brainer. Right after we say that, he starts shaking his head no and saying we got it all wrong. He says, "The best nation in the world is not the USA, it's a donation, boys." Needless to say, we all started laughing and each gave him a dollar.

Also like others have said, bums who are at least up front about wanting alcohol, I'm a lot more inclined to give them money. I guess that seems weird, but the bum who wants a beer will get a buck from me, but the one who wants food, I'll offer food to, but won't give them money.

Here's a picture we got with a bum outside of Yankee Stadium.

5/19/2006 3:46:06 PM

wlb420
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Quote :
"We were up in D.C. one time and a bum comes up to us and asks "Fellas, what's the best nation in the world." And since it was pretty close to when September 11th happened, we figured he was just being patriotic, so all of us are like the USA without a question, thinking this is just a no-brainer. Right after we say that, he starts shaking his head no and saying we got it all wrong. He says, "The best nation in the world is not the USA, it's a donation, boys." Needless to say, we all started laughing and each gave him a dollar"


dude earned that one though.

Have you encountered the amazing joke telling bum downtown?

5/19/2006 4:17:42 PM

WMVlad007
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gotta tell you, is it that difficult for homeless people to get a job at like mc donalds or something? and try to get their life on? or i guess they just dont try. and every time you give them money you encourage their failure.

5/19/2006 5:51:00 PM

RhoIsWar1096
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^Yes. The Hillsboro merchants' association got together a while back and offered the bums jobs cleaning up and doing other odd jobs in their businesses. The bums wouldn't work for less than $10/hr. because that's what they can make begging on the street.

---

In downtown Quebec these young guys (late teens) walk around in traffic with signs that have on them:

MARIJUANA
COCAINE
HERION
POUTINE

With the first three crossed out and a checkmark by the poutine. Apparently it's some local dish that sounds like a garbage plate...

---

Whenever bums ask me for change I tell them "change comes from within"

---

Walrus lady.

---

When you see bums coming ask them if you can have a dollar - they'll usually give it to you.

---

Last one: there's a skinny guy name Marcus that hangs around Hillsboro, around campus. I used to talk to him a bit, but never gave him money. I used to offer him food, but he'd never take it. I heard he did a lot of drugs so I didn't wanna give him cash... He used to talk to God - kinda funny.

A year or so ago he told me he needed money for a bus ticket - said his brother was in the Air Force and was going to Iraq for reconstruction so Marcus said his brother wanted him to take care of his farm in Virginia for him. He needed money for his bus ticket though. I had just sold back all my books for the semester, and he said he needed another $25. I gave it to him, and never saw him again... until this semester. He didn't remember me, but I asked him about going to Virginia and he told me all about it. From what I've heard he's turned his life around, goes to church now, and is on his way back into society.

SO. While I may not give the usual panhandling alcolics CASH, I will buy them food or give when I think it may do some good.

Larisa, I always thought you're pretty hot (hottie + guns mmmm) and intelligent as well, but good lord I don't understand how you can be so ignorant in this case.

[Edited on May 19, 2006 at 7:16 PM. Reason : .]

5/19/2006 7:11:40 PM

Wraith
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You would think that he would remember you if you gave him so much.

5/19/2006 8:17:33 PM

ncsutiger
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All the bums are going to figure out that being honest about wanting a beer is going to work, and then they'll really make money, based on several posts in both of these threads.

5/19/2006 10:31:49 PM

ussjbroli
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Quote :
"POUTINE
"

is french fries covered in gravy and topped with melted cheese

5/19/2006 10:56:43 PM

MalikDaMan
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My favorite bum story (and the only time when I felt bad about not giving a bum a dollar or two) is from when I was in Vancouver a couple years ago with some friends of mine.

We went to GM Place (which is in downtown Vancouver) to watch the Canucks and Coyotes play, and after the game as we're all filing out the arena we see this one bum singing this little song with his cap held out in front of him while he was doing this little jig:

"Beer, beer, beer, beer!
Beer, beer, beer, beer!
Please give a bum some
Money to buy a beer! Beer!"

It was possibly the most entertaining thing I've ever seen--and he was at least (partially) honest and didn't badger people, so I actually felt bad about not having a spare dollar to give him.

5/20/2006 12:35:26 AM

GrumpyGOP
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Guy comes up to me and my friends, says, "Y'all, you look like real dudes. You da kinda guys like to fuck a bitch. Ain't like dem fags, dem goths, dem frat boys. You fuck a bitch."

5/20/2006 1:01:07 AM

EnderJRD
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Quote :
"is french fries covered in gravy and topped with melted curdled cheese"

5/20/2006 7:54:05 AM

MalikDaMan
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That "curdled" cheese is simply cheese that hasn't been pressed into the mold to make a solid block of cheese. i.e. it's cheese bits.

5/20/2006 8:51:06 AM

EnderJRD
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I'd be all about some poutine if it were nacho cheese.

5/20/2006 9:12:51 AM

MattJM321
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my brother told me about this bum when he went to georgia tech

bum: "hey man, what don't a black girl and and bowling ball have in common?"
brother: "don't know"
bum: "when you're really hungry, you can eat a bowling ball."

my bro gave him a buck for making him laugh

5/20/2006 5:49:31 PM

30thAnnZ
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zenobia,

i hope you're having a good day. are you comfortable? yes? okay, would you like a beverage? no? okay. now that that's out of the way,

FUCK YOU, YOU WORTHLESS CUNT. I HOPE YOU GET DIE OF FUCKING GONNORHEA, YOU DISGUSTING, SLIMY, ARROGANTLY USELESS PIECE OF EUROTRASH.

CHOKE ON A COCK AND DIE.


[Edited on May 20, 2006 at 5:54 PM. Reason : *]

5/20/2006 5:54:18 PM

Beardawg61
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Hi Zenobia, long time no see! How are things? PM me.

At any rate, I rarely give cash but when I lived where there actually were homeless ppl (Raleigh) I bought a lot of food. Although, I would give money the the fiddler on H-boro St. I don't know his name. I frequently saw Joseph (the black ninja guy on Western) food. I'd see him on the way to food kitty and buy something that I thought he could eat... he was always very gracious... I figured that some ppl lived that life of their own volition, some didn't. I might end up that way one day, God forbid, and I'd appreciate it if ppl would help me.

It's not my place to judge him for whatever got him in that position, but if a tiny percentage of my budget means that he gets a meal, regardless if he's tripping on crack and dancing in the rain later, well, it's prolly just about the least I could/should do.

A lot of times it's ppl who deserve love the least that need it the most. That's a lot easier said than it is to practice but I try...

I'll tell some funny stories later. I too, have pwnt bums.

[Edited on May 20, 2006 at 6:58 PM. Reason : .]

5/20/2006 6:57:20 PM

Kibong
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One of my buddies was sitting at armadillo grill downtown and some beggar sold him a parakeet for 7 dollars but the beggar and the bird looked cracked out. the bird chills out for an hour then all of a sudden flies across the street. Hits the wall at sullivans steakhouse then flies up higher into the window hits that and plummets towards my friends hand. He caught the bird it lived for another hour then died in his lap at armadillo grill. He buried it outside of that restaurant. Everytime we go there we pour one out of our homey, dillo.

5/20/2006 10:35:20 PM

Sleik
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Two other bum stories, both from my first days at Morehouse College in Atlanta.


First one, I went out with six of my ROTC buddies to Lenox Mall to catch a movie (back when they had the movie theater on the same level as the food court). We caught the last film, the last N/S train back to Five Points... and were waiting on the last Fair St./Ga Tech bus (#13) to pick us up. While waiting on the bus, this bum approaches the seven of us. Tells us this story about how he used to work at the airport, but after 9/11 they started doing more serious background checking; he got fired and started working for a construction company, which later tanked due to financial mis-management. Of course he didn't use those exact words, but his story was so linear and sensible... however, most of us had only our debit cards on us + the MARTA tokens that the ROTC program gave us, so we didn't give him any cash. The bum then went over to talk to the next set of people, so a couple of us drifted to within earshot... he had another story, just as deliberately thought-out, but with an entirely different set of parameters. I remember giving him 50 cents just on principle.

The next day was move-in day for seniors, so we got to meet all of our 1/C MIDNs for the first time outside of Navy regalia. We all went and hung out on "The Strip," which in the AUC is a four-block span of campus connecting Morehouse, Spelman, and Clark-Atlanta. A few of us went to Stegall's (the corner store) for some soda; when walking out, this bum started asking for change.

One of our seniors put this dude up to earn every cent he got from us. First, he told him, "There are 100 pennies scattered around this block. Find them all and you'll have a dollar." So after finding like 3 cents that one of us dropped, he was like, "Man this is some bullshit, what else I need to do?"

Same guy says, "5 bucks for 100 pushups. If you don't do 100, you'll get a nickel a piece." The bum does like 7 pushups, and he gets a quarter and a dime.

The final thing he was made to do was sing new jack swing hits to women passing by on the Strip. But no, not the good-looking ones. We'd find the most maladjusted women for him to sing to, for a dime a song. He must have serenaded 6 women, good for 60 cents.

A bum "earned" 98 cents for 2 hours' worth of work for a group of guys cracking up at him the entire time.

5/21/2006 1:57:32 AM

ncsutiger
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^^weird coincidence - at the adoption event today this guy told me about someone that was trying to sell a parakeet in the bar he worked in.

5/21/2006 2:31:29 AM

Sleik
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bttt i know y'all have more stories

5/25/2006 7:25:17 PM

Reverie
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Last summer I was throwing a T.V away at the dump/recycling place. It was a pretty big, old, and really heavy. When I pulled up I saw this guy laying in the grass a bit away. As I backed up to get rid of it he just pops up and hops in the back of my truck. This guy was fucked up looking. He was your typical crack addict, grass in fizzy ass afro... So hes in the back of my truck and tries to unload my T.V. Hes huffing and puffing and grunting..while the T.V. doesnt move. It was pretty funny. So I end up unloading it and get back in the truck. As Im putting on the seat belt BAM there he fucking is with the door closed and shit putting on HIS SEAT BELT. wtf. So im kinda scared... So i try to play it cool and am like "Whatcha doing man". and hes like "lets go, lets go" Well we end up having a long conversation trying to figure out what he wants or where he wants to go. I came to the conclusion that he wanted to go to the stars.

Well I finnally told him he needed to get out and he did, but anyway..

5/26/2006 11:29:33 AM

Yodajammies
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woah, thats creepyyyyyyy.

5/26/2006 11:41:31 AM

Wraith
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Ha, maybe it would be a good idea to start locking your doors when bums are around you and your car is stopped.

5/26/2006 11:46:05 AM

pawprint
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This guy came up to us at Sushi Blues last night and started dancing along beside us as we walked in. He stopped at the door and exclaims, "Now THAT'S what I'm talkin' ABOUT!" Pretty humerous.

5/26/2006 1:06:19 PM

Aficionado
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that guy that goes around asking for gas money to get to greensboro stopped me thursday at the avent ferry subway

he said that he just brought his son to school

i stopped him and said i bet you are asking for money to get gas to go back

and he was surprised and said can you help me

and i said no, because you run that scam on everyone

5/26/2006 1:14:54 PM

Wyloch
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My most memorable beggar story - It was during the holidays two years ago - mid December I think. I was downtown, and had just finished performing in a concert over at Memorial Auditorium.

I was walking back to my car and a guy hunched over in the bushes, half conscious, barely breathed out "sp-sp-spare change?"

So I helped him into my car, took him back to my house, heated up a few cans of Campbell's soup, and gave him the pile of clothes I had intended to take home because they were too big on me. By the time I got him back downtown he was pretty awake and said told me I could just drop him off at the first convenient spot, which coincidentally was where I found him. In the two years since I never saw him again.

5/26/2006 9:33:53 PM

MinkaGrl01

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^that's a nice story

5/27/2006 7:55:02 AM

DeputyDog
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I thought they were gonna say it turned out to be Jesus.

5/27/2006 11:21:22 AM

Sayer
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My most memorable beggar story:

A buddy of mine and I were eating lunch in some restaurant up on Capital and this black guy comes in. He's obviously homeless and he spends about 3 or 4 minutes standing near the door just looking around the restaurant at everyone there. Then he starts wandering around. The only reason I noticed is because I like to keep my keys, wallet and cell phone on the table when I'm eating instead of in my pocket. I felt like the guy would try to grab and run.

So.. eventually he makes his way by our table. He pauses for a second and says to me "Hey man, can I borrow your phone?"

Without missing a beat, my friend looks up and says "Borrow his phone? Does he have Bell South written across him? Does he look like public telephone? No. Borrow his phone?! I'll tell you what you need to borrow.. you need to borrow a job. Be like 'Excuse me, can I hold this job for a second?' No you can't borrow the phone..." and went back to eating... everyone in the restaurant around us was laughing under their breath.. cause he definitely said that loud enough for a bunch of people to hear. Guy just have him a dirty look and walked out without saying anything.

5/27/2006 12:02:50 PM

urge311
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back when i worked downtown, a bum approached me right before i went into work asking for some change for some food. i told him no, but that i would buy him some subway right next to us. it just had to be $6 or less ebcause that's all i had. guy took me up on the deal. got a foot long meatball sub with EVERY SINGLE THING IMAGINABLE on it. i could tell the guy really must have been starving, going for the most bang for the buck there.

i'll buy a bum some food, but i wont give them money.

5/27/2006 12:50:21 PM

Wolfpacker06
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When I used to live on Lake Boon Trail there was this homeless guy, Joe, who lived under the 440 bridge there. He and like 5 of his buddies all had "hooches" around there, tents and tarps and things back in the woods. But Joe didn't even have that, he just had some blankets under the bridge on the concrete. I used to go hang out with him and he would tell me crazy stories about how he was involved in assasinations for a secret military unit and he really couldn't tell me places or names, but he could tell me what happened. Crazy stuff, if it's to be belieived. I would bring him bananas because he said the potasium helped his joints. He was an alchy and knew it, but wasn't ready for rehab. So he said. I gave him clothes, a pillow and a sleeping bag before winter that year. After I moved in the spring, I never saw him...

So if any of you ever see a guy begging on those off ramps there on Lake Boon Trail, give him a dollar, i know the guy.

5/27/2006 1:29:32 PM

Wolfpacker06
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bttt...any new stories?

6/6/2006 10:37:54 AM

Wraith
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Yesterday I was at Big Lots with my roommate. The crazy kung-fu guy that hangs out at the Western and Gorman intersection was in there getting some canned soup. After he got his soup, he asked the cashier if he could have two extra bags. She asked why and he said, "I need them for the ants. The ants don't respect me."

6/6/2006 10:54:16 AM

FitchNCSU
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There are some people in Miami hanging out at gas stations asking for gas money. Its always the same damn gas station, different idiot. Last night I got really pissed off.

Some white trash with rice burner last night asked me to help fill his car, without even saying please. This annoyed me greatly. I tell him "Get your credit card! Western Union? How the hell are you going to run out of gas in a major city?" So he acts like he wants to fight and starts talking trash to me so I get out of the car only to taunt him some more for running out of gas in a city. I mean really- who does that?

Other than these types of people, I generally buy food or something when they ask "I'm hungry could you get me something to eat." I'll get them something at corner store, CrackDonald's, Taco Hell, or the BK Lounge if they ask.

[Edited on June 7, 2006 at 12:51 PM. Reason : :]

6/7/2006 12:49:58 PM

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