April is not her best month.

4/20/2013 3:31:24 PM

hope she likes the taste of prison pussy and asshole

4/20/2013 3:35:58 PM

This may sound weird... But I think I can help her. I think I can change her.

4/20/2013 3:36:40 PM

4/20/2013 3:41:58 PM

Prison does not fix addicts. What a waste.

4/20/2013 5:08:06 PM

Quote :

"Total Incarceration Term: 1 YEAR 2 MONTHS Conviction Date: 04/01/2013 Projected Release Date: 08/11/2013"

i guess the 1 year 2 months is the maximum, and the projected release date is assuming good behavior? i don't know shit about prison.

I didn't read the whole thread... does anyone know what the B&E was for? trying to get more pills or something?

4/20/2013 5:26:50 PM

she probably got credit for timed serve

4/20/2013 5:30:58 PM

Quote :

"I didn't read the whole thread... does anyone know what the B&E was for? "

I'm willing to exchange that info for PigPen's freedom.

4/20/2013 6:14:31 PM

She broke into our hearts.

4/20/2013 6:16:50 PM

not mine

4/20/2013 6:41:17 PM

nooooo

4/20/2013 7:01:06 PM

What a frittata.

4/20/2013 7:14:32 PM

Quote :

"Prison does not fix addicts. What a waste."

she's not in there for drugs.

i mean, it might not fix her, but what're you gonna do? Let people off the hook for felonies because they probably wouldn't have committed them had they not had a drug problem?

4/20/2013 11:37:16 PM

They had the NC Womens Prison on MSNBC Lockup a few weeks back.

It did not seem that bad, but the shittiest thing was that if you want any food besides bologna sandwiches and shit you have to have some family or friends putting money on your acct to get stuff from the commissary.

Pretty much any personal items or food more than like the most basic shit you have to get from the commissary, and you can work a job in the jail for a few cents a day or if you have family to send money you will be a lot better off.

I guess if anyone is actually friends with her, wants to do something, and knows her family is not helping her out a nice thing to do would be send a few dollars (in a money order) and write her a letter.

4/20/2013 11:51:59 PM

Good luck getting fine on a diet of bologna sandwiches.

4/20/2013 11:53:28 PM

Didn't she bwn a TWWer or two? I want to say the last one was Mr. Joshua

4/21/2013 12:07:06 AM

4/21/2013 12:08:05 AM

^+1

4/21/2013 12:12:16 AM

Here is the prison handbook.

The pic of the prison store is on page 58.
http://www.doc.state.nc.us/publications/2006handbook.pdf

4/21/2013 12:16:05 AM

I love how its all minorities on the cover

4/21/2013 12:18:11 AM

Except for, y'know, the white woman in the middle.

OR IS SHE CHECHEN

4/21/2013 12:21:13 AM

looks indian to me

4/21/2013 12:24:03 AM

Would anyone be interested in writing her a TWW letter with me?

4/21/2013 12:24:43 AM

to me she looks like a check republican to me

4/21/2013 12:24:45 AM

I will write her a letter.

Mailing address:
1034 Bragg Street
4287 Mail Service Center
Raleigh NC 27699-4287

Rachel M Patterson
Offender Number: 1288388

4/21/2013 12:27:44 AM

EMCE: I have a great idea involving giving her a debit card

The cool part is in order to get the PIN she has to read a flipbook consisting mostly of our animated junk

4/21/2013 12:56:15 AM

Quote :

"Would anyone be interested in writing her a TWW letter with me?"

Lets do it in the thread right now. Then someone can copy and paste it to microsoft word and send it to her.

4/21/2013 11:26:39 AM

Cue some one sending her the inside sales copy pasta

4/21/2013 12:23:34 PM

send her a hand written note for a personal touch

WOMEN'S PRISON NEEDS = BALLERS
YOU = BALLER

4/21/2013 12:30:39 PM

Quote :

"Lets do it in the thread right now. Then someone can copy and paste it to microsoft word and send it to her."

I think TWW actually loads in printer friendly version, you just cant put anything that is banned by the DOC in the thread.

4/21/2013 1:04:21 PM

I just want to start off by saying if you want an answer at the end, prepare to be disappointed. There just isn't one.

I was an intern at Nickelodeon Studios for a year in 2005 for my degree in animation. It wasn't paid of course, most internships aren't, but it did have some perks beyond education. To adults it might not seem like a big one, but most kids at the time would go crazy over it.

Now, since I worked directly with the editors and animators, I got to view the new episodes days before they aired. I'll get right to it without giving too many unnecessary details. They had very recently made the SpongeBob movie and the entire staff was somewhat sapped of creativity so it took them longer to start up the season. But the delay lasted longer for more upsetting reasons. There was a problem with the series 4 premiere that set everyone and everything back for several months.

Me and two other interns were in the editing room along with the lead animators and sound editors for the final cut. We received the copy that was supposed to be "Fear of a Krabby Patty" and gathered around the screen to watch. Now, given that it isn't final yet animators often put up a mock title card, sort of an inside joke for us, with phony, often times lewd titles, such as "How sex doesn't work" instead of "Rock-a-bye-Bivalve" when SpongeBob and Patrick adopt a sea scallop. Nothing particularly funny but work related chuckles. So when we saw the title card "Squidward's Suicide" we didn't think it more than a morbid joke.

One of the interns did a small throat laugh at it. The happy-go-lucky music plays as is normal. The story began with Squidward practicing his clarinet, hitting a few sour notes like normal. We hear SpongeBob laughing outside and Squidward stops, yelling at him to keep it down as he has a concert that night and needs to practice. SpongeBob says okay and goes to see Sandy with Patrick. The bubbles splash screen comes up and we see the ending of Squidward's concert. This is when things began to seem off.

While playing, a few frames repeat themselves, but the sound doesn't (at this point sound is synced up with animation, so, yes, that's not common) but when he stops playing, the sound finishes as if the skip never happened. There is slight murmuring in the crowd before they begin to boo him. Not normal cartoon booing that is common in the show, but you could very clearly hear malice in it. Squidward's in full frame and looks visibly afraid. The shot goes to the crowd, with SpongeBob in center frame, and he too is booing, very much unlike him. That isn't the oddest thing, though. What is odd is everyone had hyper realistic eyes. Very detailed. Clearly not shots of real people's eyes, but something a bit more real than CGI. The pupils were red. Some of us looked at each other, obviously confused, but since we weren't the writers, we didn't question its appeal to children yet.

The shot goes to Squidward sitting on the edge of his bed, looking very forlorn. The view out of his porthole window is of a night sky so it isn't very long after the concert. The unsettling part is at this point there is no sound. Literally no sound. Not even the feedback from the speakers in the room. It's as if the speakers were turned off, though their status showed them working perfectly. He just sat there, blinking, in this silence for about 30 seconds, then he started to sob softly. He put his hands (tentacles) over his eyes and cried quietly for a full minute more, all the while a sound in the background very slowly growing from nothing to barely audible. It sounded like a slight breeze through a forest.

The screen slowly begins to zoom in on his face. By slow I mean it's only noticeable if you look at shots 10 seconds apart side by side. His sobbing gets louder, more full of hurt and anger. The screen then twitches a bit, as if it twists in on itself, for a split second then back to normal. The wind-through-the-trees sound gets slowly louder and more severe, as if a storm is brewing somewhere. The eerie part is this sound, and Squidward's sobbing, sounded real, as if the sound wasn't coming from the speakers but as if the speakers were holes the sound was coming through from the other side. As good as sound as the studio likes to have, they don't purchase the equipment to be that good to produce sound of that quality.

Below the sound of the wind and sobbing, very faint, something sounded like laughing. It came at odd intervals and never lasted more than a second so you had a hard time pinning it (we watched this show twice, so pardon me if things sound too specific but I've had time to think about them). After 30 seconds of this, the screen blurred and twitched violently and something flashed over the screen, as if a single frame was replaced.

The lead animation editor paused and rewound frame by frame. What we saw was horrible. It was a still photo of a dead child. He couldn't have been more than 6. The face was mangled and bloodied, one eye dangling over his upturned face, popped. He was naked down to his underwear, his stomach crudely cut open and his entrails laying beside him. He was laying on some pavement that was probably a road.

The most upsetting part was that there was a shadow of the photographer. There was no crime tape, no evidence tags or markers, and the angle was completely off for a shot designed to be evidence. It would seem the photographer was the person responsible for the child's death. We were of course mortified, but pressed on, hoping that it was just a sick joke.

The screen flipped back to Squidward, still sobbing, louder than before, and half body in frame. There was now what appeared to be blood running down his face from his eyes. The blood was also done in a hyper realistic style, looking as if you touched it you'd get blood on your fingers. The wind sounded now as if it were that of a gale blowing through the forest; there were even snapping sounds of branches. The laughing, a deep baritone, lasting at longer intervals and coming more frequently. After about 20 seconds, the screen again twisted and showed a single frame photo.

The editor was reluctant to go back, we all were, but he knew he had to. This time the photo was that of what appeared to be a little girl, no older than the first child. She was laying on her stomach, her barrettes in a pool of blood next to her. Her left eye was too popped out and popped, naked except for underpants. Her entrails were piled on top of her above another crude cut along her back. Again the body was on the street and the photographer's shadow was visible, very similar in size and shape to the first. I had to choke back vomit and one intern, the only female in the room, ran out. The show resumed.

About 5 seconds after this second photo played, Squidward went silent, as did all sound, like it was when this scene started. He put his tentacles down and his eyes were now done in hyper realism like the others were in the beginning of this episode. They were bleeding, bloodshot, and pulsating. He just stared at the screen, as if watching the viewer. After about 10 seconds, he started sobbing, this time not covering his eyes. The sound was piercing and loud, and most fear inducing of all is his sobbing was mixed with screams.

Tears and blood were dripping down his face at a heavy rate. The wind sound came back, and so did the deep voiced laughing, and this time the still photo lasted for a good 5 frames.

The animator was able to stop it on the 4th and backed up. This time the photo was of a boy, about the same age, but this time the scene was different. The entrails were just being pulled out from a stomach wound by a large hand, the right eye popped and dangling, blood trickling down it. The animator proceeded. It was hard to believe, but the next one was different but we couldn't tell what. He went on to the next, same thing. He want back to the first and played them quicker and I lost it. I vomited on the floor, the animating and sound editors gasping at the screen. The 5 frames were not as if they were 5 different photos, they were played out as if they were frames from a video. We saw the hand slowly lift out the guts, we saw the kid's eyes focus on it, we even saw two frames of the kid beginning to blink.

The lead sound editor told us to stop, he had to call in the creator to see this. Mr. Hillenburg arrived within about 15 minutes. He was confused as to why he was called down there, so the editor just continued the episode. Once the few frames were shown, all screaming, all sound again stopped. Squidward was just staring at the viewer, full frame of the face, for about 3 seconds. The shot quickly panned out and that deep voice said "DO IT" and we see in Squidward's hands a shotgun. He immediately puts the gun in his mouth and pulls the trigger. Realistic blood and brain matter splatters the wall behind him, and his bed, and he flies back with the force. The last 5 seconds of this episode show his body on the bed, on his side, one eye dangling on what's left of his head above the floor, staring blankly at it. Then the episode ends.

Mr. Hillenburg is obviously angry at this. He demanded to know what the heck was going on. Most people left the room at this point, so it was just a handful of us to watch it again. Viewing the episode twice only served to imprint the entirety of it in my mind and cause me horrible nightmares. I'm sorry I stayed.

4/21/2013 1:13:12 PM

1 year and 2 months of your tax payer money! DEY DURK ER $!

4/21/2013 1:38:17 PM

LOLOLOLOL @ BigMan157

4/21/2013 5:45:15 PM

Still no addy on fb. Must still be incarcerated

4/21/2013 8:33:03 PM

Holy shit Forte. Ain't no one got time for all that.

4/21/2013 8:45:03 PM

Also, entirely too tempting to post the incarceration report on her FB.

4/22/2013 10:21:54 AM

thank's for cracking that indecipherable code for us!

4/22/2013 10:32:00 AM

"Thank's," huh?

4/22/2013 10:37:13 AM

it's possesive'

4/22/2013 10:45:11 AM

^^ since you're an english major, can you tell me why you include the punctuation in the quotation, even though it isn't part of the quote?

the british form makes sense...the american form is stupid

[Edited on April 22, 2013 at 10:48 AM. Reason : carats]

4/22/2013 10:48:00 AM

Yeah, it's a bitch detector.

4/22/2013 10:57:46 AM

Quote :

"Also, entirely too tempting to post the incarceration report on her FB."

Why? Because you're a douchebag?

4/22/2013 11:23:11 AM

I wouldn't be surprised if inmates had internet access by now. She may pop up sooner than later.

4/22/2013 11:28:44 AM

What kind of status updates would you post from the butt hut??

"Peach cobbler today! Whoo hoo bitches!"

4/22/2013 12:40:30 PM

It's fairly easy to score drugs in prison

At least she will be high as a kite under the watchful eye of some rough and tough inmates

4/22/2013 12:44:29 PM

I don't know this girl but I'd be willing to send a few bucks her way; I am obsessed with prison documentaries (lock up, etc) and my heart breaks for the people with no one on the outside.

Does anyone know how I can go about doing this? Do I just send cash in a letter to that address? A cashiers check? I don't have time to go through that whole PDF.

4/22/2013 12:54:53 PM

my dream has always been to be a part of a conjugal visit

4/22/2013 12:57:08 PM

Yea, send cash through the mail - that sounds like an intelligent thing to do.

4/22/2013 12:59:14 PM

^^^ i'd hold off on doing that. Given that she is a repeat offender, an uncomfortable few months in the big house might actually knock some sense into her (but probably not)

[Edited on April 22, 2013 at 12:59 PM. Reason : .]

4/22/2013 12:59:28 PM

if you buy stuff at the store you just get beatup and have it stolen

4/22/2013 1:03:17 PM