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 Message Boards » » Shit your coworkers say Page [1] 2, Next  
dropdeadkate
nerdlord
11725 Posts
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"I think Jesus is sweetly raping my anus. I am feeling serenely buttfucked right now"

I laughed. A lot.

4/17/2012 4:07:54 PM

Jeepin4x4
#Pack9
35774 Posts
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you should make a twitter!

4/17/2012 4:08:51 PM

scotieb24
Commish
11089 Posts
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4/17/2012 4:09:13 PM

pilgrimshoes
Suspended
63151 Posts
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that sounds familiar, like a quote from nick swardson or something

but im not googling that at work

4/17/2012 4:14:11 PM

scotieb24
Commish
11089 Posts
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never thought I'd hear sweetly and raping in the same sentence.

Is that game? Here are 2 words make a sentence?

4/17/2012 4:15:58 PM

dmspack
oh we back
25541 Posts
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^^i googled it and came up with nothing.

4/17/2012 4:17:42 PM

pilgrimshoes
Suspended
63151 Posts
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4/17/2012 4:18:23 PM

dropdeadkate
nerdlord
11725 Posts
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I am pretty sure it was an original. She is a special person my coworker.

4/17/2012 4:18:37 PM

pilgrimshoes
Suspended
63151 Posts
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is she everything special to you

4/17/2012 4:19:34 PM

craptastic
All American
6115 Posts
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"derp derp im fucking stupid"

Because they're all fucking stupid.

4/17/2012 4:22:35 PM

justinh524
Sprots Talk Mod
27857 Posts
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Hola, me llamo josé.

4/17/2012 4:30:52 PM

dropdeadkate
nerdlord
11725 Posts
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"every tenth body on the fire needs to be a woman"

4/17/2012 4:38:59 PM

Krallum
56A0D3
15294 Posts
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"My name is Kunta Kente"

I'm Krallum and I approved this message.

4/17/2012 4:51:08 PM

justinh524
Sprots Talk Mod
27857 Posts
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Quote :
"coworkers"

4/17/2012 5:20:17 PM

BettrOffDead
All American
12559 Posts
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dear HR,

this bitch cray

lurve,
k8

4/17/2012 6:21:31 PM

ncsuapex
SpaceForRent
37776 Posts
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My coworkers are German. I have no idea what they say.

4/17/2012 6:22:36 PM

TreeTwista10
minisoldr
148457 Posts
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4/17/2012 6:24:46 PM

dropdeadkate
nerdlord
11725 Posts
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Coworker: Kate lets get a kitty for the lab. it's free!

Intern: if the kitty is free.... what's to stop people from eating it?



..........lolwut?

7/20/2012 2:05:37 PM

dropdeadkate
nerdlord
11725 Posts
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"Is being racist a bad thing?"

this was a totally legit question

2/25/2014 9:14:01 AM

Klatypus
All American
6786 Posts
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^lol

coworker of mine says "bless her/his heart" before talking about anyone ...

not that interesting, but I laugh

2/25/2014 9:21:04 AM

Fareako
Shitter Pilot
10238 Posts
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"Nut to butt, that's the way I like it, because I'm not having fun unless there's a dick in my ass."

2/25/2014 9:24:11 AM

Dr Pepper
All American
3583 Posts
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"now I'm not a racist, but I don't eat my meals with the other color" (100% verbatim)

then, following that, from the same person:

"you know, they are really pushing this [black & white thing] nowadays, the TV commercials show 'em [black and white people] riding around in cars together all the time"

2/25/2014 9:32:59 AM

BobbyDigital
Thots and Prayers
41777 Posts
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i'm trying to think of where you might work that would hire the type of moron who thinks like that

2/25/2014 9:39:46 AM

Dr Pepper
All American
3583 Posts
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I am in NC - so, pick up a rock, throw it, and I'm sure it will land near (or hit) someone who has said something similar to that in the past day or so.

2/25/2014 11:06:10 AM

BobbyDigital
Thots and Prayers
41777 Posts
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I lived in NC my whole life until 2 years ago, and I never heard anyone talk like that in a workplace. They usually internalized it until they were back home again.

Not to say they don't exist, but it's somewhat hard to believe someone would be comfortable enough to say that at work in 2014.

2/25/2014 11:10:16 AM

GREEN JAY
All American
14180 Posts
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So why does Dr Pepper seem like a sympathetic figure to someone who wants to make these revelations? I tell people the first time that I don't wanna hear shit like that.

2/25/2014 11:15:50 AM

Dr Pepper
All American
3583 Posts
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^because I don't really give a fuck?


yeah, I mean, its not an unexpected thing for older, country folk.

[Edited on February 25, 2014 at 11:17 AM. Reason : -]

2/25/2014 11:16:53 AM

Førte
All American
23525 Posts
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I work for the Federal Government and I hear stuff like that all the time. of course, I'm in Charleston, but still, it's a lot more common than you might want to believe

2/25/2014 11:20:13 AM

GREEN JAY
All American
14180 Posts
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Knowing that people think that kind of bullshit and tolerating them speaking it aloud are two different things. next time they start in on that just be like oh hay brb, I'm off to nuke you a nice steaming mug of stfu

2/25/2014 11:22:47 AM

Dr Pepper
All American
3583 Posts
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beh, I've better use of my time than to lecture someone about that topic.... like keep the masses entertained with dumb shit posted on tww.

[Edited on February 25, 2014 at 11:25 AM. Reason : -]

2/25/2014 11:25:17 AM

Bullet
All American
28427 Posts
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I had a co-worker who constantly would say "Like I said" all the time. Even though it was the first time they said it.

2/25/2014 11:29:55 AM

BrickTop
All American
4508 Posts
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Quote :
"So why does Dr Pepper seem like a sympathetic figure to someone who wants to make these revelations"

uhhhhh

it didn't sound that way at all... seems to me he's not representing it, only reporting it

2/25/2014 11:41:35 AM

Byrn Stuff
backpacker
19058 Posts
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Is it just something racists when they think, "Hey, it's just us white folks. I can relax."

I get a lot of the, "Hey, you're black. What's the deal with [thing black kids have been observed doing]?"

2/25/2014 11:44:49 AM

Dr Pepper
All American
3583 Posts
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^^


"It took my time" that's one I was trying to remember. Jesus.

[Edited on February 25, 2014 at 11:45 AM. Reason : -]

2/25/2014 11:45:24 AM

GREEN JAY
All American
14180 Posts
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"please keep that kind of comments to yourself" isn't a lecture. enjoy your racism in the workplace!

2/25/2014 11:45:40 AM

dyne
All American
7323 Posts
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believe it or not, some people aren't as intolerant of intolerance as some of the tards on this message board.

2/25/2014 11:46:56 AM

Dr Pepper
All American
3583 Posts
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...back on topic, c'mon guys.


"Methology" instead of "Methodology"

2/25/2014 11:48:05 AM

Klatypus
All American
6786 Posts
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hahaha^

boss calls our growth chambers 'gross chambers', and I cannot help but giggle a little

2/25/2014 11:49:11 AM

Dr Pepper
All American
3583 Posts
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ahhhh:

"lay" (Lathe)
"kill" (Kiln)
"Compactive" (Capacitive)
"Thermaldynamics" (thermodynamics)

2/25/2014 11:51:33 AM

synapse
play so hard
60939 Posts
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Quote :
"Refresh your browser 4 times and try again"


[this guy probably gets paid over $100k]

2/25/2014 11:52:05 AM

BigMan157
no u
103354 Posts
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i prefer talking to my subordinates over my coworkers

2/25/2014 12:03:04 PM

BrickTop
All American
4508 Posts
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masonary (masonry)

2/25/2014 12:03:21 PM

wdprice3
BinaryBuffonary
45912 Posts
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Quote :
"I get a lot of the, "Hey, you're black. What's the deal with [thing black kids have been observed doing]?""


So while you're black, what's up with some black people not getting out of the left lane when they're holding up traffic?

2/25/2014 12:39:25 PM

Byrn Stuff
backpacker
19058 Posts
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After years of being held back in the workplace, they've decided to reciprocate on the highway

[Edited on February 25, 2014 at 12:48 PM. Reason : but probably just confirmation bias]

2/25/2014 12:43:37 PM

dmspack
oh we back
25541 Posts
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My coworker says this at least once every single day...usually multiple times per day.

He'll make or receive a phone call. Person on the other end asks him how he's doing. His response :"Oh not bad for a [insert day of the week]". Almost every fucking phone call he says that lame shit.

Edit:maybe that's more of a workplace annoyance. But yeah whatever.

[Edited on February 25, 2014 at 1:14 PM. Reason : Jj]

2/25/2014 1:11:16 PM

Dr Pepper
All American
3583 Posts
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...it is shit someone says....

WE'RE GOOD

2/25/2014 1:26:52 PM

Agent 0
All American
5677 Posts
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It's not a what, but a how it's said. My office is adjacent to the real life Jacob Silj.

2/25/2014 2:13:16 PM

dropdeadkate
nerdlord
11725 Posts
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"This feed smells like bender's butthole. Robotic assssssss"

2/25/2014 2:44:58 PM

Dr Pepper
All American
3583 Posts
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"ACCORDANTLY" (accordingly)

2/25/2014 2:46:50 PM

Schmitty
All American
982 Posts
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my boss talked about the long kway (queue) for getting our equipment repaired

This was also the guy who thought Thanksgiving was on the same date every year, yet amazed that it was always a Thursday

2/25/2014 6:43:16 PM

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