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 Message Boards » » ITT: LP78 Tells Us Epic Stories Page [1] 2, Next  
PackPrincess
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First Story: LP78 and the Old Bitch at Kashmir


*sits on floor indian style and listens intently*

[Edited on November 28, 2010 at 6:49 PM. Reason : .]

11/28/2010 6:44:17 PM

saps852
New Recruit
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queen of hyperbole

11/28/2010 6:45:20 PM

LivinProof78
All American
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the old bitch was actually at Kashmir

11/28/2010 6:45:59 PM

thegoodlife3
All American
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I enjoy stories

wtf is Kashmir?

11/28/2010 6:47:58 PM

IMStoned420
All American
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Katmandu?

11/28/2010 6:48:43 PM

pttyndal
WINGS!!!!!
35217 Posts
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Second Story: LP78 bout beats someone's ass while tailgating

11/28/2010 6:49:10 PM

crazy_carl
All American
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india and pakistan fight over it, thats all i know

11/28/2010 6:49:36 PM

EMCE
balls deep
89771 Posts
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She gave me a gloryhole BJ at EV once

it was above average, but not the best. I could tell her heart wasn't really into it.

11/28/2010 6:49:39 PM

LivinProof78
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it's some bar over by Sullivan's...

but here is an abbreviated version because i can't go into much detail on tww...

i was pissed because my turkish "friend" is a complete man whore and ditched me in the bar for some old chick...

and she kept being a bitch and laughing at me...

so after i had enough of it and she wouldn't go away i knocked her ass up against the wall...and she still wouldn't leave...

some girl came up to me while this was going on and said "thanks for doing that...she's been trying to fuck every dude in our group all night"...

then the old bitch tried to leave with us...luckily his friend took care of her...

11/28/2010 6:50:43 PM

saps852
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she gave gunzz a handjob in the guys bathroom at the goat

11/28/2010 6:50:47 PM

G.O.D
hates 4 lokos
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who is the old bitch? did I see her?

11/28/2010 6:50:58 PM

LivinProof78
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she was the old ass short bitch attached to old ass Turkish asshole all night...

so probably not

11/28/2010 6:52:09 PM

Doss2k
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This should be entertaining

11/28/2010 6:53:09 PM

G.O.D
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what was she wearing?

11/28/2010 6:54:06 PM

LivinProof78
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i have no idea

11/28/2010 6:54:26 PM

G.O.D
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was there one or two turkish dudes?

11/28/2010 6:57:00 PM

LivinProof78
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there were 2...

the other one is actually a decent human being....haha

[Edited on November 28, 2010 at 6:57 PM. Reason : not won]

11/28/2010 6:57:28 PM

Ragged
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tell them about every time you have met me and cant remember. due to being drunk or falling on the floor

11/28/2010 6:57:48 PM

LivinProof78
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well you pretty much just summed it up right there

11/28/2010 6:58:17 PM

pttyndal
WINGS!!!!!
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or the time she got mad and tried to punch you and fell?

11/28/2010 7:00:17 PM

LivinProof78
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that's not what happened...

i tried to fist bump him and missed and fell out of my chair...

then i got mad and blamed him for me falling

11/28/2010 7:01:17 PM

Mr. Joshua
Swimfanfan
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Sounds like a typical night out at Cashmere.

11/28/2010 7:32:07 PM

Jaybee1200
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she sounds like a cool dude

11/28/2010 7:35:44 PM

jataylor
All American
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haha drama when casey goes out? neverrrr

11/28/2010 10:37:12 PM

th3oretecht
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11/28/2010 10:39:28 PM

LivinProof78
All American
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and repeat...

i could pretty much copy and paste the last story and just change the location...

only this time the chick came up and introduced herself to me in order to "avoid any problems"...which was weird...

but then i saw them making out on the dance floor so i proceeded to jerk his ass off the dance floor and use some very strong language

1/9/2011 3:41:03 PM

saps852
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its your fault for putting up with it

1/9/2011 3:43:22 PM

BigMan157
no u
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i added an 'on' to that last sentence and it had a very different meaning

1/9/2011 3:44:52 PM

LivinProof78
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^^you're exactly right

1/9/2011 3:47:01 PM

yuffie_chan
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Quote :
"i tried to fist bump him and missed and fell out of my chair..."


best part yet.

1/9/2011 4:07:43 PM

RainbowNinja
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this chick sounds fun

1/9/2011 4:10:30 PM

twoozles
All American
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*add to my topics*

1/9/2011 4:20:03 PM

synapse
play so hard
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1/9/2011 4:41:44 PM

lewisje
All American
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Third Story: LP78 finally FDTs

1/9/2011 4:57:06 PM

smoothcrim
Universal Magnetic!
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i need to be home the next time you come over so i can hear these stories while being in your way with my dog

1/9/2011 4:58:58 PM

Tarun
almost
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1/9/2011 5:05:33 PM

LivinProof78
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this isn't an epic story by any means....but it's sorta humorous

so...on Saturday I met my friends Jessie and Laura out downtown for the St. Patty's Day stuff...

Laura was there with her new friends...I spent all of about 2 minutes even in their general area when they first got to Napper Tandy's...I was there to see Jessie and Laura so I wasn't really concerned with hanging out with Laura's friends and they were drunk and had their own agendas anyway...so all was well, or so I thought...

i mean...they seemed okay....except for this one fat, blond bitch...

Jessie and I were sitting at the back bar just hanging out and catching up when these 2 guys came up to us...they were marines who Jessie, Laura, and company had met at Tir Na Nog earlier in the day...one of them wandered off pretty quickly to find Laura...the other hung around a little longer but sorta lost interest in us when we weren't impressed by all his "cool" stories...

apparently fat, blond bitch had laid claim to him at the last bar and took some sort of offense to me talking to him...

Jessie and I later found Laura and her Marine...she was hammered at this point and being her normal, charming drunk self...i.e. being a complete bitch to everybody except the dude with the penis she was planning on riding later in the night...at this point we're both pretty much done with Laura and, by extension, her group of friends...

we decide to go back inside and just hang out since we haven't seen each other in months and just wanted a laid back evening...so we go sit down at the front bar this time...

we were sitting at the corner of the bar...fat, blond bitch's dude comes up to us and just starts rambling off some more of his shit but fat, blond bitch and the rest of the gang arrived shortly so Jessie and I just started talking shit to the nice bartender...

at some point the dude whips out his junk and shows the ladies how awesome he is...luckily I missed this part but the fact that I was in the vicinity of his penis was apparently enough to piss off fat, blond bitch...

they were standing at the same corner as we were sitting...just at a 90 degree angle from us...so that's, what, maybe 3 feet away at the most...

i hear "who the fuck is that girl anyway and what's she doing here"....it didn't really sink in until i hear "she's one of Laura's old friends"...i glance over and see this look of pure hatred on fat, blond bitch's face pointing in my general direction and I realize they are talking about me because they already know Jessie...

Jessie shoots a look at me because she knows what's coming...

i lean over as far as i can and say "BITCH...I CAN FUCKING HEAR YOU! YOU SHOULDN'T TALK SHIT ABOUT PEOPLE IF YOU DON'T KNOW WHETHER THEY WILL BEAT YOU ASS OR NOT....ESPECIALLY IF THEY CAN HEAR YOU!"

all of a sudden she looks like a deer in headlights and gets very meek and timid all of a sudden....basically she acts like she doesn't know what i'm talking about...Jessie is just cracking up...she knows the girl is just a mouthy bitch...

anyway...her and the rest of the crowd leave us in peace and we have a delightful rest of the night

3/14/2011 3:01:37 PM

thegoodlife3
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Quote :
"at some point the dude whips out his junk and shows the ladies how awesome he is...luckily I missed this part but the fact that I was in the vicinity of his penis was apparently enough to piss off fat, blond bitch..."


wow

I can't believe that sort of thing really happens

3/14/2011 3:05:32 PM

adultswim
Suspended
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ITT: LP78 tells us stories about bitches bein bitches

3/14/2011 3:11:26 PM

LivinProof78
All American
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yeah...i guess they do...

he tried to tell us he was a FDNY fireman...


i was like "i bet you're a marine or a soldier and you're probably from iowa or something"


he didn't like me much

3/14/2011 3:12:49 PM

PackPrincess
All American
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oooh, good story! read me another one!

3/14/2011 3:13:44 PM

Mr. Joshua
Swimfanfan
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ITT: LP78 wins my love

3/14/2011 3:16:23 PM

saps852
New Recruit
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should I be glad I didn't go? I'm not sure

3/14/2011 3:24:34 PM

LivinProof78
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you would have had fun with me and jessie...

and the party was fun...

3/14/2011 3:25:36 PM

bmel
l3md
11149 Posts
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Why fat girls always gotta be starting shit?!

3/14/2011 3:26:32 PM

Mr. Joshua
Swimfanfan
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They always end up drunk, alone, and bitter at the end of the night.

3/14/2011 3:27:37 PM

LivinProof78
All American
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no shit...


fat people should never be angry


bitchy fat girls are the worst

3/14/2011 3:28:24 PM

Toms House
All American
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Tell us about the time you licked my ear at a party!!!

3/14/2011 3:54:12 PM

LivinProof78
All American
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i don't recall that...


but it doesn't really surprise me

3/14/2011 3:56:15 PM

Doss2k
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What about the story about that time we went to Olive Garden... oh wait

3/14/2011 5:54:11 PM

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