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0EPII1
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I just made an amazing chocolate using a unique recipe which I am sure no one has ever used. Here are the ingredients:

Betty Crocker's Dark Chocolate Cake Mix []

Unsweetened 99% cocoa baking chocolate (German), chopped, 75 g
Cacao beans (Ecuador), raw, finely chopped, 6
Cocoa powder (German), 3 tbsp

Bananas, mashed, 2 (separated batter into 2 equal parts, and added to 1 half at the end)
Zucchini, finely shredded, 1
Carrot, finely shredded, 1
Prunes, quartered, 15

Next five products by http://www.bobsredmill.com
Wheat bran, 2 tbsp
Oat bran, 2 tbsp
Flaxseed meal, 2tbsp
Rolled oats, 3 tbsp
Whole grain pancake and waffle mix, 5 tbsp

Water, ~1 cup
EVOO, 3 tbsp (could have done without any oil at all)
Eggs, 3
Natural yogurt, low-fat, 170g tub

Herbs Provencale, dried, 1/4 tsp (thyme, marjoram, rosemary, oregano, savoury, basil, tarragon)



I was also going to add 1 shredded apple (makes cakes/brownies very moist) as I have done it before, but with all the other non-baking ingredients I added for the first time ever (zucchini, carrot), I thought it wasn't a good idea as the cake might not bake and/or fall apart once baked.

Cake turned out extremely moist, and delicious. More like a rich dessert than a cake. And the banana one is even better tasting.

I have been making [relatively] healthy cakes and brownies for a long time, but I must admit, always from commercial mixes. In the next couple of years, I am going to learn proper [healthy] baking from scratch so that when it is time for my daughter to have a bit of cake on her birthdays, she eats delicious and nutritious stuff, not commercial shit full of sugar, white flour, nasty fats, and millions of colors, flavors, and preservatives.

BTW, the dried herb mixture added a very nice barely noticeable flavor.

12/2/2009 7:14:12 PM

wdprice3
BinaryBuffonary
45912 Posts
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[words]

12/2/2009 7:14:36 PM

evan
All American
27701 Posts
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i am not a fan of chocolate cake

12/2/2009 7:19:28 PM

0EPII1
All American
42541 Posts
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then you won't get none of mine!

and it doesn't have to be chocolate.

you can take any other flavor cake mix and add any/all the ingredients i added, except for the cocoa/chocolate stuff. you can get some amazing tasting results!


[Edited on December 2, 2009 at 7:22 PM. Reason : ]

12/2/2009 7:20:25 PM

dropdeadkate
nerdlord
11725 Posts
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i have always preferred cookies

12/2/2009 7:32:25 PM

Ernie
All American
45943 Posts
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YO

MY NAME IS OPPIE1

I TRIED TO TEACH MY DAUGHTER 18 LANGUAGES WHILE SHE WAS IN THE WOMB

AND I PUT FUCKING PRUNES IN MY CHOCOLATE CAKE

LOOK AT ME

I'M A FUCKING GLOBAL CITIZEN

12/2/2009 9:13:37 PM

erice85
All American
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that cake sounds like my weekly diet all shit out into your pan at once ready for baking

12/2/2009 9:17:27 PM

khcadwal
All American
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i don't like chocolate cake either

but i do like brownies (in moderation, not as much as some people do)

one of my friends has a recipe for broccoli brownies but you can't taste the broccoli and some other BS goes in there too. i kinda want to try them sometime

12/2/2009 9:58:16 PM

ssclark
Black and Proud
14179 Posts
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prunes.....

12/2/2009 10:10:34 PM

ssclark
Black and Proud
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12/2/2009 10:13:49 PM

wdprice3
BinaryBuffonary
45912 Posts
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^that guy is pretty funny. sometimes.

12/2/2009 10:14:58 PM

whtmike2k
All American
2504 Posts
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4K5YBNQq-Qo

12/2/2009 10:16:02 PM

th3oretecht
All American
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Quote :
"More like a rich dessert than a cake."


you've been doing it wrong if you think cakes aren't often rich desserts

12/3/2009 12:23:32 AM

BIGcementpon
Status Name
11318 Posts
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ibt cake farts

12/3/2009 12:32:46 AM

th3oretecht
All American
15539 Posts
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I have to admit, when I first saw cake farts, I thought it was hilarious

12/3/2009 1:41:41 AM

H8R
wear sumthin tight
60155 Posts
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nom nom

12/3/2009 1:42:09 AM

0EPII1
All American
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wow we got some really closed-minded stupid motherfuckers up in here is quite sad, actually. anyway, keep eating your garbage you call food, more good stuff for me!

Quote :
"that cake sounds like my weekly diet all shit out into your pan at once ready for baking"


don't lie... you don't eat any of those things, except perhaps bananas

Quote :
"but i do like brownies (in moderation, not as much as some people do)

one of my friends has a recipe for broccoli brownies but you can't taste the broccoli and some other BS goes in there too. i kinda want to try them sometime"


i add most of that stuff to brownies as well, and it makes really rich, moist, and dense brownies. those broccoli brownies sound intriguing... i wonder what the purpose is of adding them. i guess they are for moistness, as the fiber in them will hold water (same reason for adding prunes and the Bob's Red Mill products). these are the best brownies you have never had:
http://www.101cookbooks.com/archives/amazing-black-bean-brownies-recipe.html

Quote :
"you've been doing it wrong if you think cakes aren't often rich desserts"


well, mine are always moist, but i have had a lot of cakes, both commercial and at other people's houses, that are just very 'cakey' and quite dry.

12/3/2009 3:12:33 AM

0EPII1
All American
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You know what else is great to add moistness to cakes and brownies?

Chopped dates

I have done it before, and the results are always amazing. And they add a nice flavor as well.

And a tub of cream cheese is also very good, but adds too much saturated fat, so I have stopped doing that.

12/3/2009 9:29:23 AM

BettrOffDead
All American
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you know how to make a moist cake? follow the directions on the box and stop putting fucking vegetables in a cake. It's a fucking cake man. Save the stupid hippie bullshit for your 3 meals a day. the whole point of dessert is to get away from all that and fucking pork out for a bit.

12/3/2009 9:37:00 AM

Ronny
All American
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Quote :
"YO

MY NAME IS OPPIE1

I TRIED TO TEACH MY DAUGHTER 18 LANGUAGES WHILE SHE WAS IN THE WOMB

AND I PUT FUCKING PRUNES IN MY CHOCOLATE CAKE

LOOK AT ME

I'M A FUCKING GLOBAL CITIZEN"

12/3/2009 9:38:08 AM

LRlilDaddy
All American
6511 Posts
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I have used that recipe before. it was meh

12/3/2009 9:55:19 AM

quagmire02
All American
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12/3/2009 10:06:28 AM

0EPII1
All American
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Quote :
"you know how to make a moist cake? follow the directions on the box and stop putting fucking vegetables in a cake. It's a fucking cake man. Save the stupid hippie bullshit for your 3 meals a day. the whole point of dessert is to get away from all that and fucking pork out for a bit."


So you have never had carrot cake, and will never have it? Fucking idiot.

Nevermind the fact that the one I made tasted better than what it would taste if it was just using the box directions! And it was healthy as well. But, nutrition doesn't matter to you, taste does, right? So if mine tasted better (according to several people who tried it, without knowing the ingredients), shouldn't that trump the fact it contained vegetables? So, stop fucking contradickting yourself. You carry on with your boring life if you want... don't put down others who like to experiment and have fun, and make something better in the process. Oh wait, you are a troll... I wasted my energy typing all that.

12/3/2009 10:40:31 AM

quagmire02
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1lqfQi7146U



[Edited on December 3, 2009 at 10:42 AM. Reason : .]

12/3/2009 10:41:25 AM

LRlilDaddy
All American
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Quote :
"contradickting"


spelling fail. and you are calling other people idiots..... wow

12/3/2009 10:42:44 AM

0EPII1
All American
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wow... i did that on purpose... are you that thick?

i am known to make the least number of spelling mistakes in my writing, whether on the internet or off.

[Edited on December 3, 2009 at 10:47 AM. Reason : can't you see the bolding?]

12/3/2009 10:46:09 AM

BettrOffDead
All American
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haha

i win! you got angry!


also, it probably tasted better because you put more chocolate in it.


get a clue caketard

12/3/2009 10:50:08 AM

LRlilDaddy
All American
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wow... i did that on purpose... are you that thick?

applies to my post as well as yours

12/3/2009 10:56:15 AM

0EPII1
All American
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^^ yes you win!

and stop pretending to know anything about cakes or chocolate, ignoramus


^ whatever helps you sleep at night, dude.


[Edited on December 3, 2009 at 10:57 AM. Reason : ]

12/3/2009 10:56:31 AM

LRlilDaddy
All American
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like pillows, and the sound of a fan, and warm sheets....?

12/3/2009 11:00:41 AM

0EPII1
All American
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exactly!

12/3/2009 11:04:15 AM

LRlilDaddy
All American
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but really i have been trolling you the whole thread. thats just the first one you responded to. sorry dude. hope you liked your cake.

12/3/2009 11:05:55 AM

0EPII1
All American
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Quote :
"but really i have been trolling you the whole thread. "


i got the memo

yeah, i loved my cake, and will love it for the next several days

12/3/2009 11:08:25 AM

eleusis
All American
24527 Posts
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Quote :
"the one I made tasted better than what it would taste if it was just using the box directions! And it was healthy as well. "


taking a cake and adding a carrot and some prunes to it does not make it healthy by any stretch of the imagination.

12/3/2009 11:37:21 AM

McDanger
All American
18835 Posts
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lol

12/3/2009 11:38:52 AM

Skwinkle
burritotomyface
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I was with you until you added herbs.

12/3/2009 11:41:28 AM

McDanger
All American
18835 Posts
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trap is actually getting into a pissing contest over cakes itt

12/3/2009 11:41:43 AM

OopsPowSrprs
All American
8383 Posts
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Quote :
"commercial shit full of sugar, white flour, nasty fats, and millions of colors, flavors, and preservatives"


NOW you're talking.

12/3/2009 11:46:51 AM

Arab13
Art Vandelay
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Quote :
"YO

MY NAME IS OPPIE1

I TRIED TO TEACH MY DAUGHTER 18 LANGUAGES WHILE SHE WAS IN THE WOMB

AND I PUT FUCKING PRUNES IN MY CHOCOLATE CAKE

LOOK AT ME

I'M A FUCKING GLOBAL CITIZEN"


L
OH FUCKING
L

quality... yeah man you made vegetable fruit cake, not 'cake'

i mean fuck, you put goddam HERBS in a fucking CAKE....

i suppose that was to mask the several ounces of oats, brans, meal and fucking WAFFLE MIX... but then again you also put in a goddamn carrot and zucchini and prunes....

bananas at least make a little sense....

the only normal shit you used were the eggs, oil, water, cake mix, and what is normally a excessive amount of chocolate (even by my standards) but i suppose you had to mask that mega colon blow taste somehow...

i mean shit man, i thought you ate a decent diet then you go throw this mess in there... what did you do? blindfold yourself, spin around 10 times fast, then stumble into the kitchen and grabbed the first 15 items you touched? good thing you missed the Sixteen raw sausages in a wooden bowl


this kinda shit is stuff parents concoct to trick their kids to eat decently....

Quote :
"taking a cake and adding a carrot and some prunes to it does not make it healthy by any stretch of the imagination."


lol, perhaps a little better but then again he added another pound of chocolate to it as well



MOST RIDICULOUS CAKE RECIPE EVER!

12/3/2009 11:47:23 AM

EMCE
balls deep
89772 Posts
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I mix my dogs heart worm medicine in with a dog treat so he will eat it

12/3/2009 11:52:22 AM

0EPII1
All American
42541 Posts
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Quote :
"taking a cake and adding a carrot and some prunes to it does not make it healthy by any stretch of the imagination."


how would you know? did you do a chemical analysis of my cake? i added a lot more than carrot and prunes.

overall, maybe it was healthy, maybe not, as the betty crocker mix is quite shitty (50% sugar, white flour, tons of garbage, etc). i would pay someone to do a nutritional analysis of it, but i don't know anybody who could.

however, with all the things i added, i boosted the fiber content by > 500%, decreased the sugar ratio by a lot, tripled the protein content, and of course, added tons of phytonutrients/antioxidants from cocoa, fruits/veggies, etc.

overall, was it enough to overcome the shittiness of the cake mix? i don't know.

Quote :
"I was with you until you added herbs."


the herbs added a nice barely noticeable flavor. those who didn't know about them couldn't taste the herbs, but a couple of them said they felt a tiny bit of refreshing 'coolness' to it, which i guess was from the herbs.


oh look, another troll STFU Arab13. there is so much shit in that post of yours, i don't even know where to start. it is obvious you have NO experience with cooking or taste of foods from some of the things you just said (you think that adding wheat/oat bran to a cake batter would actually impart any taste... wow, what an ignorant retard, and you also think pure good chocolate is unhealthy ). i would educate you, but your assholish attitude points to an "i am the best, i know everything even in domains i don't have much experience with, i don't want to learn anything" type of personality. suit yourself. you stick with stuff you know and are good at compared to others, and i will stick to what i am good at. and take that stick out of your ass... you don't have to eat my cake.

12/3/2009 11:57:56 AM

chocolatervh
All American
22986 Posts
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the cake is a lie

12/3/2009 11:59:12 AM

McDanger
All American
18835 Posts
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hahahah

12/3/2009 12:05:55 PM

Ronny
All American
30652 Posts
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Seriously, that cake sounds like the worst thing ever.

Fuck this thread, fuck your cake, and fuck you.

12/3/2009 12:10:57 PM

McDanger
All American
18835 Posts
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if trap's wife said it sucked (which it did) he would have beat her into next week

12/3/2009 12:12:02 PM

Ronny
All American
30652 Posts
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12/3/2009 12:13:25 PM

Arab13
Art Vandelay
45180 Posts
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good thing they are in a country were if he didn't beat her he'd get in trouble

i don't doubt that 90% of the folks in this thread could out bake you...

(not saying that the chocolate is bad for you (anything in high doses is though) just that you added a ton of it for the only apparent reason of covering up other 'tastes' that never belonged in a cake to begin with... )

if you think those brans and whatever taste good go eat a spoonful dry right now and come back and tell us how good it tastes as it sandblasts your digestive tract

Quote :
"overall, maybe it was healthy, maybe not, as the betty crocker mix is quite shitty (50% sugar, white flour, tons of garbage, etc). i would pay someone to do a nutritional analysis of it, but i don't know anybody who could."


this is probably 80% of your original problem to begin with.... then you tossed a bunch of random healthy shit in there to help 'balance it out' well i'm sure you balanced the healthy bits but you definitely didn't balance the flavor or the texture...

HERBS man HERBS, seriously? GFTO with that shit

12/3/2009 12:13:42 PM

khcadwal
All American
35165 Posts
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here is the recipe for the brownies

the friend that makes them is a runner and a health food nut so i thinks she adds the broccoli MOSTLY to get her daughter to eat it hehe but apparently they have a lot of fiber and protein and stuff.

Quote :
"Let me start by saying I don't measure anything, so these are guesses. You really can't mess this up.

Ingredients:

2 Medium heads of broccoli
salt
1 egg room temp.
1/2 stick of butter
2 tbls of olive oil
1 cup natural peanut butter (or regular if you're not picky)
1/3 cup of wheat germ
Up to one cup of reserved water from boiling broccoli
Your favorite brownie mix (I use Giradelli)

To Make
Preheat oven to 325. Bring a big pot of water to a boil, add a few pinches of salt. Chop broccoli into meduim size portions, add to boiling water. Boil for 5 minutes or until tender. Drain, reserve the water. Put broccoli, butter and 1 tlbs of olive oil into food processor and process until smooth. Transfer to a large mixing bowl and let it cool off a little. (At this point, you shuold have about 1.5 - 2 cups of broccoli mixture. Trust me - it will look like a lot, but it will be hidden nicely.) Add peanut butter and wheat germ (you could also add flax seed at this point but Elin can detect that stuff a mile away). Mix until blended. Beat egg in seperate bowl and add a little of the broccoli mixture to the beaten egg to temper (if you add egg directly to mixture, you will scrammble it unless mixture is completely cooled). Add brownie mix. If it is too thick (it will be), add 1/2 cup of reserved water and 1 tbls of olive oil.

Bake in oven for 90 minutes. The box will say 45 minutes but all the moisture from broccoli will make this like fudge if you don't cook it long enough. I do the toothpick test about 1 hour into it and usually go 15-30 minutes longer. I've never over-cooked these.

Remove from oven, cool, cut and serve. "

12/3/2009 12:18:17 PM

OopsPowSrprs
All American
8383 Posts
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Take out the broccoli and you've got a winner.

12/3/2009 12:20:46 PM

Arab13
Art Vandelay
45180 Posts
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everything i've ever tasted with extra stuff in it for 'healthy' reasons as always sucked (from 5-10 different cooks)

12/3/2009 12:21:07 PM

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