I am looking for personal experiences, any and all, but more of a union btw two different christian denominations..

10/1/2008 1:12:32 AM

One of my friends was Baptist and married a guy who was Seventh Day Adventist. It did not end well

10/1/2008 2:00:29 AM

is this not normal? My entire extended family is mixed of Catholic, Greek Orthodox, and Protestant. We don't have any divorces either.

Most married people I know are from different Christian denominations and its not an issue.

Now if you're a fanatic then you have a problem.

10/1/2008 2:10:00 AM

I wouldn't say fanatics, we agree to disagree, but I we are both pretty active...We both strongly love each other's love for God though and do things like discuss the bible and pray together...

He however won't step foot into my church for instance because he disagrees with a lot of my church's practices because to him my church goes against a lot of what the bible teaches.

I'm catholic btw, but I am also very liberal thinking when it comes time its all btw you and God and as long as you live the best life you can and have love for God then you will be fine.



[Edited on October 1, 2008 at 2:31 AM. Reason : s]

10/1/2008 2:29:27 AM

If the only thing that matters to you in the end is loving God and living a good life, why don't you just convert to whatever he's into?

Maybe you're not as liberal as you think you are? I mean, I know some liberal Catholics, and none of them would qualify two denominations getting together as an interfaith marriage. Maybe they're not "real" Catholics or something?

[Edited on October 1, 2008 at 3:08 AM. Reason : I gotta sleep.]

10/1/2008 3:04:08 AM

I regret posting too much of my personal information, even though this is the lounge its still tww...

I don't want this to turn into something about me I was just looking for people's experiences not to be rude but I don't really want opinions on my situation because its not that serious, it was just a few discussions we have been having lately...

10/1/2008 3:12:46 AM

Okay, I'd like to pose a question to all the "very liberal" Catholics out there:

Do you really consider a marriage between folks of two denominations an interfaith marriage?

(I'm emboldened by all the "Religulous" previews I've seen in the past few days.)

10/1/2008 3:19:29 AM

Quote :

"He however won't step foot into my church for instance because he disagrees with a lot of my church's practices because to him my church goes against a lot of what the bible teaches."

The big question here is kids -- whether you're having any, whether you're OK with them being raised not-Catholic, whether he'd be OK with raising them Catholic.

It sounds like the answer to the last question is "No."

Then there's the whole issue of how the Catholic Church feels about it, which is . . . not necessarily good, unless you agree to raise the kids Catholic. So then you have to ask yourself how much you care about the consequences of possibly going against that in so far as your own church is concerned.

My mom is Methodist and my dad is rabidly agnostic and generally has nothing good to say about religion, and they've gotten along fine for more than 25 years. Mostly it just doesn't come up. They made an agreement before they got married that dad wouldn't have to go to a church service more than four times a year, and I don't think she ever made him go even that much. And as far as I can tell, they generally agreed that mom could take my brother and I to church, but dad could present his side of the argument. Which I guess sort of worked, except for the part where I somehow came out Eastern Orthodox, but whatever.

The point is that both parties have to be willing to bend a fair amount, just like with many things, and the concern now from what you've said is that your guy doesn't seem to have too terribly much bend about some parts.

10/1/2008 3:30:21 AM

Explain to me how two christian denominations = interfaith.

I'm atheist and married a hardline presbyterian.

There are certain subjects that both of you need to get out in the open ahead of time: ethics, children, roles of husband and wife, managing of money, etc.

If you can work those out then difference of doctrines is easy to smooth out.

10/1/2008 5:53:36 AM

I understand that you are Catholic. Out of curiosity, what is he?

10/1/2008 5:56:53 AM

marriage between 2 different Christian Denominations is hardly interfaith..... If you can't work that out between yourselves, you're screwed.

interfaith implies christian/muslim, christian/hindu, muslim/atheist, something like that. Something that has a fundamental belief difference.

If you both identify as Christians, then the rest is just details. You both go to a big building each week that wants 10% of your money supposedly in the name of the same Trinity - does it really matter which big building you decide to give your money to?

10/1/2008 7:02:22 AM

sounds like he's Baptist and you're Catholic. just like my mom and dad. you know what they did? meet in the middle. Non-denominational ftw.

10/1/2008 7:22:49 AM

take a hint from the moravians:

Quote :

"In Essentials, Unity; In Non-essentials, Liberty; In All Things, Love."

odds are that you're both wrong in the petty differences, so realize that you both share the same overall picture and celebrate that for what it's worth...which, really, is a lot

[Edited on October 1, 2008 at 9:07 AM. Reason : oh, good...another one of THESE threads]

10/1/2008 9:05:37 AM

My mom's catholic and my dad's jewish. Never comes up. He's been to church for weddings, funerals, baptisms, first communions and confirmations. And that's all he's ever been for.

At their wedding, there was a priest and a rabbi at the church. My brother, sister and I were raised catholic (since we technically couldn't be jewish without converting), but we still celebrated the jewish holidays too.

When I was younger, I thought everyone celebrated Hanukkah. I was surprised when I found out they didn't.

Two of my dad's three brothers also married catholic women. There's never been a problem. It's only a problem if you make it one, really.

10/1/2008 9:18:16 AM

Quote :

"Interfaith Marriages?"

+

Quote :

"btw two different christian denominations"

=

LOL, does not compute.

10/1/2008 9:20:24 AM

Quote :

"It's only a problem if you make it one, really."

In all seriousness, this is the bottom line. I know of a Baptist and a Catholic that have been married since 2005 with no religious issues.

10/1/2008 9:22:20 AM

I'm catholic, and my wife is presbyterian.

no issues to report.

10/1/2008 10:13:14 AM

I probably misused the word interfaith, i should have used mixed marriages. but for some Catholics if you arn't marrying a catholic they may call it an inter faith marriage.

as for children he doesn't care if I would teach them about Catholicism and raise them that way ,that is if they are not forced say like into a catholic school. Which I wouldn't want to force anyone into a religion they don't want to be.

10/1/2008 11:55:58 AM

Again, you never mentioned what he was unless I missed it. Mainstream Protestant and Mainstream Catholic aren't going to have many problems nowadays.

Now, if he is a Jehovah, Adventist, Mormom, etc then I would run away and never look back (this, from personal experience) Course, I am a rabid atheist, so my opinion may be skewed, but I doubt by much.

If faith poisons a relationship, or makes you have second thoughts, I would question that faith before the relationship.

10/1/2008 12:48:59 PM

Quote :

"If faith poisons a relationship, or makes you have second thoughts, I would question that faith before the relationship."

that's a really good way of looking at it (also coming from a "rabid atheist")

10/1/2008 1:07:17 PM

Quote :

"Explain to me how two christian denominations = interfaith."

10/1/2008 1:12:20 PM

i broke up with a smokin hot 17 year old a few years ago bc she wanted me to convert for her

it doesnt matter to which bc i dont subscribe to any of them

but it just depends on what % that is important to the relationship, since it doesnt matter to me and it mattered like 80% to her then we clearly weren't going to get very far

so if you can imagine a life where he never "comes around" and you still disagree after all those years, is that really such a bad thing?

10/1/2008 1:45:48 PM

Quote :

"He however won't step foot into my church for instance because he disagrees with a lot of my church's practices because to him my church goes against a lot of what the bible teaches. I'm catholic btw, but I am also very liberal thinking when it comes time its all btw you and God and as long as you live the best life you can and have love for God then you will be fine."

Sounds like he has some hangups, especially about interpreting the bible and his apparent perception of the Catholic Church. Perhaps he should talk with someone about Catholicism (they won't try to convert him, just answer his questions and accusations)

It's not uncommon at all. Catholicism has some of the most voracious negative propaganda spread about it.

Quote :

"Okay, I'd like to pose a question to all the "very liberal" Catholics out there: Do you really consider a marriage between folks of two denominations an interfaith marriage? (I'm emboldened by all the "Religulous" previews I've seen in the past few days.)"

Be advised, I am not a "very liberal" Catholic.

my answer: it depends on which denominations you are referring to. Technically no. In reality it can be to some extent. If you are comparing Methodist or Lutheran (or church of england) to Catholicism there aren't many big differences or sticking points (mostly dealing with the Pope) but if you are comparing Jehovah's Witnesses / Pentacostal's to Catholics, yes you would very much be going inter-faith as there are many major differences.

it depends.

[Edited on October 1, 2008 at 1:57 PM. Reason : s]

10/1/2008 1:53:12 PM

Quote :

"Catholicism has some of the most voracious negative propaganda spread about it."

I can't imagine why...

10/1/2008 1:55:57 PM

I'm an atheist, but as far as I'm concerned Catholicism is the only real form of Christianity.


*ducks head down under desk*

10/1/2008 2:06:26 PM

^^

see what i mean

^ ahah, in a sense you're right, in others not so much, which is kinda funny from your perspective i would think.


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anti-Catholicism

a lot of it is ingrained from birth into some people.

I wasn't raised with an anti-protestant backing which makes me wonder why some people are so hostile towards Catholics.

Catholicism is very old. For over 1500 years to be Christian was to be Catholic (for 80% at least, in some manner this includes Eastren Orthodox and several other subdivisions) Since then "christians" haven't been doing all that great either.

Even Catholic schools don't "force" you to become Catholic, most of the religion class is historical bible analysis and ethical commentary. Most students at catholic school (at least in my class) were pro-choice. There wasn't a hostile attitude projected on to non-catholics at catholic school.

Quote :

"The big question here is kids -- whether you're having any, whether you're OK with them being raised not-Catholic, whether he'd be OK with raising them Catholic. It sounds like the answer to the last question is "No.""

and how big of a thing is it for you and your family if he refuses to be married in the Catholic church (he doesn't need to be catholic i don't think)

these are probably the major issues about it, the other are comparatively minor by comparison as you don't have to live with them all the time.

10/1/2008 2:10:31 PM

if they're too closed minded to accept that both are just different interpretations of the same book they shouldn't be having kids anyway.

10/1/2008 2:15:47 PM

^ sounds more like him being that way but yeah, that's what i was driving at

10/1/2008 2:20:58 PM

my fiance' and i are both humanists

hooray for logic and critical thinking!!

10/1/2008 2:31:05 PM

I suppose I'd call myself a "liberal Catholic" ("lapsed Catholic" also comes to mind considering how often I actually make it to church, but...neither here nor there)

I certainly don't see two differing Christian denominations as interfaith or even really "mixed". I mean, if you're talking a fundamental or radical denomination (Mormon, Jehovah's Witness, hardline/traditional Southern Baptist) you might have some issues, but it's still not interfaith to me, just different ends of the Christian spectrum so to speak.

Some non-Catholics would have major issue with the fact that you have to agree to raise the kids Catholic if you want the marriage to be valid in the eyes of the Church. That's really the only big thing that comes to mind. That's also the type of thing that I, personally, find a little inflexible and might not feel too bad about breaking that little facet of the agreement. (Waiting for lightning to strike me...nope...we're good) Personally, if/when I ever marry, I would want to be married by a priest, but would be perfectly fine with dual celebrants if the lady wanted her pastor/religous leader to perform the ceremony as well.

IMO if you truly love the person, you can get over religious differences that are not, in the grand scheme of things, so monumental. If the other party is totally inflexible, though, that could be a warning sign. Religion is important, no doubt. But if it's getting in the way of love, that's not cool.

10/1/2008 2:33:02 PM

Where is that thread from the Wolf Webber who was engaged to a Jehovah's' Witness or something? It did not end well.

10/1/2008 3:34:25 PM

You are prolly talking about me and my old Mormon, stay away from fringe religions yo.

10/1/2008 4:04:46 PM

Really Quick Thread Hijack...

^How did that end up? (In a sentence or 2?)

10/1/2008 4:38:03 PM

5 years in, 3 months to wedding she went batshit crazy right into the arms of the "church" that clouded her beliefs.

10/1/2008 4:41:48 PM

.....maybe they'll give her some "KoolAid" to console her on her time with all the sinners.....

10/1/2008 5:03:06 PM

Quote :

"If faith poisons a relationship, or makes you have second thoughts, I would question that faith before the relationship."

Quote :

"that's a really good way of looking at it (also coming from a "rabid atheist")"

no, actually, that's an absolutely retarded way to look at it because you are 100% ignorant about faith

Quote :

"Course, I am a rabid atheist, so my opinion may be skewed, but I doubt by much."

the reason your opinions are horribly skewed and of absolutely jack shit value in this thread is because, as professed atheists, you can't POSSIBLY understand what religious faith IS...it is, quite simply, impossible for you

just like i can't understand what it's like to have absolutely no belief in nothingness, you can't understand what her position is like, nor the feelings and drive behind the belief in something greater than yourself...this isn't meant as an insult, i'm just pointing out that your opinions can't possibly hold any value because you're coming from the exact opposite side of the spectrum as the OP and her position is foreign to you

while you might say you're more objective because of your lack of faith, your opinion is STILL valueless because, by the nature of faith in the VAST majority of religions, there is a dedication first and foremost the one(s) they worship

am i saying that some aren't silly? am i saying that all of them aren't silly? am i saying that it's right to be intolerant? am i saying that faith should be a black-and-white all-or-nothing venture that corrupts relationships between people? no, of course not...what i'm saying is that from your particular point of view, you can't offer any useful advice because in your world, a relationship between people would trump (in your mind) a relationship between a person and their religion...while in this case, it's the exact opposite (in that a person can't be truly faithful, for good or bad, in their religion without putting it ahead and above their mortal relationships...a person who would forsake their religion for a mortal relationship was never truly faithful in the first place)

[Edited on October 1, 2008 at 6:07 PM. Reason : grammar?]

10/1/2008 6:05:09 PM

Quote :

"the reason your opinions are horribly skewed and of absolutely jack shit value in this thread is because, as professed atheists, you can't POSSIBLY understand what religious faith IS...it is, quite simply, impossible for you"

you do know that most atheists now, yours truly included, were previously Christians or of some other faith, right? And we were finally able to stand back and look objectively at the whole situation and make an informed decision for ourselves.

of course, i'm sure you'll claim that we were never "true Christians" in the first place, so therefore still have no idea what religious faith is like, right? Forget that Christians as supposedly encouraged to look at their faith critically, but whenever they do and decide that it's a crock of shit they are chastised as not being Christians to begin with.

10/1/2008 6:17:07 PM

You're right about one thing, I can't understand how someone would give up on another living, breathing person that cares about them and loves them for a religion they proscribe to due to custom and tradition. Call me crazy.

10/1/2008 6:18:51 PM

I'm not even slightly amazed that two christians could fail.

Religions fuck everything up. They convince people of ridiculous shit that they then feel the need to not only adhere to, but force upon others.

[Edited on October 1, 2008 at 7:10 PM. Reason : FAITH + 1 SON. YAY WE'RE A FUCKING CHRISTIAN ROCK BAND.]

10/1/2008 7:09:42 PM

Quote :

"but more of a union btw two different christian denominations"

I thought this thread was going to be about a Christian marrying a Muslim, a Jew marrying a Hindu, or even a Johava's Witness w/ a Catholic

lol

This country is not Iraq where sunni and shi'ite murder each other. Likely you have bigger issues if you or your parents are having friction in a relationship b.c your partner is a different denomination. As in you are one of that crazy moonbat evangelical baptists.

[Edited on October 1, 2008 at 7:49 PM. Reason : l]

10/1/2008 7:48:41 PM

It's good that she wanted a some real discussion about issues and solutions in mixed marriages, and instead has ended up with smattering of anti-christian ranting, some irrelevant questions about her choice of wording, and a rambling defense of religious faith. Oh, and an explanation of Catholicism by someone who apparently thinks that there was ever a time when Christianity=Catholicism.

Quote :

"as for children he doesn't care if I would teach them about Catholicism and raise them that way ,that is if they are not forced say like into a catholic school. Which I wouldn't want to force anyone into a religion they don't want to be."

That's reassuring, but at the same time perplexing. He thinks the Catholic church is so wrong and goes against so much of the Bible that he won't set foot in one, but he's OK with letting his offspring be brought up that way?

Either someone is overstating his opposition to the denomination or the extent to which he is willing to let it have a role in his family's life.

Quote :

"This country is not Iraq where sunni and shi'ite murder each other."

Bear in mind that it wasn't that long ago that Protestants and Catholics were murdering the shit out of each other in the United Kingdom, which I think we would all agree is several steps up from Iraq.

[Edited on October 1, 2008 at 7:53 PM. Reason : ]

10/1/2008 7:52:20 PM

If she would tell us what faith this guy is coming from then it would help us all to give her better input.

10/1/2008 8:03:35 PM

Quote :

"and instead has ended up with smattering of anti-christian ranting"

As it damn well should.

10/1/2008 8:06:33 PM

Quote :

"you do know that most atheists now, yours truly included, were previously Christians or of some other faith, right? And we were finally able to stand back and look objectively at the whole situation and make an informed decision for ourselves. of course, i'm sure you'll claim that we were never "true Christians" in the first place, so therefore still have no idea what religious faith is like, right? Forget that Christians as supposedly encouraged to look at their faith critically, but whenever they do and decide that it's a crock of shit they are chastised as not being Christians to begin with."

RABBLE RABBLE RABBLE

I'M A PUSSY WHO RESENTS MOMMY AND DADDY FOR RUINING MY SUNDAY MORNINGS AND NOW I THINK ANYONE WHO DISAGREES WITH MY DECISION TO REFUSE TO BELIEVE IN ANYTHING I CAN'T TOUCH IS STOOPID

RAWR RAWR RAWR

you cannot POSSIBLY understand what it's like to be someone who realizes and embraces their faith...just because you went to a church and mouthed a bunch of words your mommy and daddy told you to mouth, it does not, in ANY way, put you in a position to understand those who embrace their faith, even after deep reflection...you failed yourself after that reflection, while others became stronger in their faith because of it

if you are seriously implying that you were a "true christian" who also believes it's a "crock of shit", then you're far too much of a dumbass to speak intelligently with...i couldn't give a rat's ass what you believe because we are who we are, and i refuse to judge others for having different religious ideas (or lack there of)

i will, however, criticize and look down on you for being to asinine as to believe that you understand 100% what it's like to be a christian, because by your very renouncement of the faith, you lose that standing...you can't be an atheist and a christian at the same time, so what in world makes you think you can possibly understand those who are the opposite of you? you've NEVER been in their shoes (because if you had, you'd still be a christian)

again, before you turn this into an OMG QUAGMIRE HATES EVERYONE WHO'S NOT CHRISTIAN, let me make it clear that i simply have disdain for those who presume to understand when it's obvious that they simply don't have the capacity for it

[Edited on October 1, 2008 at 9:26 PM. Reason : .]

10/1/2008 9:14:08 PM

Quote :

"I regret posting too much of my personal information, even though this is the lounge its still tww... I don't want this to turn into something about me I was just looking for people's experiences not to be rude but I don't really want opinions on my situation because its not that serious, it was just a few discussions we have been having lately..."

10/1/2008 9:16:34 PM

^^ wow, great. thanks for proving my point.
I literally couldn't have done it better myself

[Edited on October 1, 2008 at 9:19 PM. Reason : .]

10/1/2008 9:18:54 PM

i think its time for this to be moved to chit-chat

10/1/2008 9:23:02 PM

^^ you don't actually have any valid points, so i don't see what i could have proven for you

10/1/2008 9:26:41 PM

agentlion:

Quote :

"of course, i'm sure you'll claim that we were never "true Christians" in the first place, so therefore still have no idea what religious faith is like, right?"

quackmire:

Quote :

"if you are seriously implying that you were a "true christian" who also believes it's a "crock of shit", then you're far too much of a dumbass to speak intelligently with"

case. fucking. closed.

your little stream of consciousness tirade there shows that you are clearly in no position to be arguing who is and isn't fit to speak intelligently about these topics.
wait till you're done frothing at the mouth first, at least.

10/1/2008 9:33:21 PM

so you're saying that someone who gives up religion as a "crock of shit" is the exact same as a person who prescribes to a religious doctrine for their entire lives?

how can you POSSIBLY be this dense? how can you see them as the same? and if i'm misreading your obvious words and you're not saying they're the same...then how you can POSSIBLY understand what it's like to be the latter when you've declared yourself the former?

it's like saying you know what it's like to be a major league baseball player because you played little league

10/1/2008 9:36:40 PM