When you've finished your poop session and want to leave without being seen, and someone comes in and lingers forever, keeping you trapped in the stall, he's called an Uncle Ted. I just had one a few minutes ago: he came in and grabbed some paper towels, then stood around forever at the sink, then took some more paper towels. His feet turned toward my stall a second and then turned back to the sink. I couldn't tell if he was waiting to use my stall, which didn't make sense because there was an empty stall in there. When someone's pooping you don't stand around and wait for the stall, you politely leave and come back later. He left an odor of cigarettes and cheap cologne.

2/1/2008 8:57:17 AM

what's really bad is when you're sitting there taking a shit, and then suddenly you hear female voices
I have camped out in a women's bathroom for 20 minutes before it was safe to leave

2/1/2008 9:00:55 AM

Yeah I hate at work when I finish and then someone comes in and brushes their teeth for like 5 minutes.

2/1/2008 9:12:05 AM

2/1/2008 9:17:09 AM

Hey bob-o

2/1/2008 9:39:22 AM

Of course Turd Burglars are far worse - the people who rattle your stall door trying to get in, despite your clearly visible shoes. A terrifying experience.

2/1/2008 9:41:12 AM

you have to cough dude.

2/1/2008 9:42:48 AM

sometimes the Turd Burglar can be displaced by a well-timed Fred Astaire. Tends not to work if they're oblivious.

This is also assuming you're not Larry Craig.

2/1/2008 9:56:53 AM