Listening to my mother berate me on my relationships.
"Why don't you have a boyfriend?"
"Because I hate small penises, mom" ( I mean, what am I supposed to say? Maybe this year I'll just tell her I'm gay to get her off my back- anybody ever bluffed gaydom? how'd that go over?)

convincing my father that I don't have a drinking problem.
"Drinking every night doesn't just stop- you wind up being 50 years old and can't sleep without it"
"Dad, YOU DRINK EVERY DAY starting at 3:00. I just drink when I find beer in my trunk."

Throwing up in my mouth from watching my sister in law boss my brother around.
"Don't work on your car, honey! Changing your oil will take like, 2 hours!"
"Dude...changing your oil takes maybe 15 minutes. Chill, woman" (That's what I WISH he'd say...but really he says, "Okay, honey" GODDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD I HATE IT.

It's really not easy being the black sheep in my family. I kind of get detached from the reality of it because I live alone and don't really ever have to deal with anything that I don't want to...until today...the day before...DUM DUM DUMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM: THANKSGIVING.

anybody else?



[Edited on November 21, 2007 at 10:21 AM. Reason : pic for the peeps]

11/21/2007 10:21:19 AM

Nah my family is not so disfunctional that i notice it. Plus I don't really care about things my family says and does to let it bother me.

[Edited on November 21, 2007 at 10:24 AM. Reason : .]

11/21/2007 10:23:50 AM

SEATTLE PUBLIC SCHOOLS: "THANKSGIVING" A TIME OF MOURNING

11/21/2007 10:23:55 AM

I wish I could be with my family this Thanksgiving.

11/21/2007 10:25:17 AM

I bluffed being queer to my aunt once, I'm a decent actor so I kept it going for the entirety of our 3 day visit with her at a cousin's wedding. She died like a few months after that, so I'm not sure she ever found out otherwise.

11/21/2007 10:26:50 AM

What they used to mean: hanging out with my family, and having a more-or-less good time
What they meant last year: slight undertones of tension and irritation; still polite; still okay
What this year is shaping up to be: overt antagonism, SEVERAL major confrontations; not seeing everyone


If things keep on the path they've been going down this year, next year's holidays will be everybody for their own. One aunt and my mother have been at each other's throats for two? years; another aunt is being a raging cunt (no, we can't come to raleigh that weekend! I won't have my baking done, despite having TWO daycare options available at no extra cost); my grandfather thinks he's being sly about playing favorites, and is brazenly trying to make me forfeit birthday celebrations so that he might leave a day sooner to go spend christmas with his 2nd wife's family.

11/21/2007 10:27:18 AM

yeah i feel ya djl, and i hate when they asked when am i going to get married.

11/21/2007 10:30:44 AM

Meh, both sides of my family are awesome, and both are big families.

11/21/2007 10:31:25 AM

^^^awesome.

simply awesome.



I mean, when I was a kid I LOVED doing thanksgiving and christmas. Now- I wind up having to do most of the cooking and ALL of the cleaning annnnnnnnnnd since I'm the only one in the family not married or still in high school- they ALL want to know what I'm doing these days....which just reminds me even more that I suck.

[Edited on November 21, 2007 at 10:34 AM. Reason : ^^^^^^^^^^]

11/21/2007 10:34:02 AM

being that i am the only one currently in my family with a college degree this eases the questioning about my personal life, but creates a whole new set of questions about what i do, how much money i make, etc etc

11/21/2007 10:35:39 AM

Quote :

""Because I hate small penises, mom""

Remind me to never try to lay you. I don't think I can deal very well emotionally with you convulsing in laughter on the floor.

11/21/2007 10:50:44 AM

Quote :

"I wind up having to do most of the cooking and ALL of the cleaning"

I volunteered

But we're only having my parents and sister over

Quote :

"Meh, both sides of my family are awesome, and both are big families."

My mom's side of the family: batshit crazy, and full of degenerates/addicts/subpar citizens. When she married my dad (not rich, still in school, played D&D), more than a few family members had the audacity to accuse her of "marrying up". Which she actually did, but had no way to know at the time

My dad's side...they're getting to the "eh, fuck 'em" stage. Apparently, my grandmother really WAS who kept things together.

My bf's maternal side ...
His paternal side: awesome. 1465 different kinds of ways.

11/21/2007 10:50:59 AM

Thanks to a sudden (and rather extreme) outbreak of acne and a bizarre patches of dry skin on my face, my Thanksgiving will consist of explaining why I haven't shaved in days (don't want to irritate the skin) and listening to comments about the acne and advice from people who don't know wtf they're talking about. I can't ever recall having an outbreak like this and a week before I go home for the first time in four months I become pizzaface.

At least I can effectively squash any questions about marriage.

11/21/2007 10:52:46 AM

Quote :

"At least I can effectively squash any questions about marriage."

11/21/2007 10:54:14 AM

how i squash questions is i act like i am going to answer, then be like 'shit, brb lemme go take this shit out of the washer' and just never come back to the conversation.

[Edited on November 21, 2007 at 10:55 AM. Reason : sadfg]

11/21/2007 10:55:13 AM

My mom skips the marriage part and moves right on to babies....

The end of the year holidays were always a time for family gatherings and was always a blast. I try hard every year to get the family together now that we're all spread out to keep that tradition going.

My joy will be the day after Christmas til the 3rd!!

11/21/2007 10:55:40 AM

Quote :

"Remind me to never try to lay you. I don't think I can deal very well emotionally with you convulsing in laughter on the floor"

11/21/2007 10:59:20 AM

I'm gonna eat with my family in Maryland b/c I don't feel like going to Charlotte to visit my parents and my little sister. i miss them and everything, but i'll see tham on Christmas.

It's easy for me to deal with the marriage question (whether i'm dating a chick or not) - i always just say something like: if any girl can convince me to marry her, then i'll marry her. otherwise, i'm not getting married.

I mean, it's the truth, and it doesn't leave much room for follow-up questions.

11/21/2007 11:01:46 AM

I'll go and pretend to be your boyfriend for $100. It'll give me a chance to wear a really pompous sweater and talk about bond trading. I could even chastise your drinking in front of your parents so they like me even more.

Then you can call them a week later and say you dumped me. lol

11/21/2007 11:02:35 AM

haha, i was gonna something like that, but then i thought: i don't like my own family that much, there's no way in hell in gonna curry favor with yours

11/21/2007 11:05:38 AM

Quote :

"always just say something like: if any girl can convince me to marry her, then i'll marry her. otherwise, i'm not getting married."

actually, i don't really get the marriage question that much. most of the women in my family are pretty gung-ho about independence and not getting married til way later in life- like 35. But they do always just want to know who I'm seeing and what kind of guy it is...and what not.

11/21/2007 11:12:12 AM

Hello Lauren, long time.

11/21/2007 11:15:28 AM

one thanksgiving when i was in high school, this fucking idiot girl i was dating left some "love bite" marks on my neck the night before - it made for some horrible moments at the dinner table.

i was just like "get over it" and they were like "so how old is she? why did she do that to your neck? who does that?"

11/21/2007 11:16:20 AM

Other than one of my cousins who I suspect is a lesbian, I'm the last person left unmarried on my mom's side of the family.

I'm the youngest cousin on both sides of the family, out of 15 total.

11/21/2007 11:16:42 AM

Hay Lauren, your mom <3's me. Tell her we're together and see what she says?

11/21/2007 11:30:23 AM

man i take my family for granted, they're pretty much awesome. never any drama. no one ever fights. everyone gets along. shit its almost boring how much everyone loves each other.

11/21/2007 11:34:54 AM

Quote :

"one thanksgiving when i was in high school, this fucking idiot girl i was dating left some "love bite" marks on my neck the night before - it made for some horrible moments at the dinner table. i was just like "get over it" and they were like "so how old is she? why did she do that to your neck? who does that?" "

god i have been there too.

11/21/2007 11:38:44 AM

okay, john.

today, i'm telling my mom that we're together. i'll let you know her exact reaction tonight at the goat.





yeah, let's all go to the goat tonight. who's down?

11/21/2007 11:39:03 AM

Quote :

"Other than one of my cousins who I suspect is a lesbian, I'm the last person left unmarried on my mom's side of the family."

Me too. My last cousin (who is a year younger than me) got married a couple of months ago.

Someone actually left a comment on my Myspace page recently asking when I'm tying the knot. I was just like "WTF? "

11/21/2007 11:39:46 AM

I'm only 24 - i have like 20 more years before I should have to think about getting married

11/21/2007 11:40:51 AM

I think that we can all agree the real meaning of the holidays is presents.

11/21/2007 11:48:46 AM

You get Thanksgiving presents?

11/21/2007 11:58:30 AM

I don't know about you, but I consider free food to be a present. Especially when there's left-overs for you to take back with you.

11/21/2007 12:07:28 PM

Quote :

"left-overs for you to take back with you. "

i gets all of the leftovers errryear

11/21/2007 12:08:42 PM

Damn, you guys have some fucked up families.

11/21/2007 12:12:46 PM

we just get drunk and have a good time at my moms house

11/21/2007 12:14:52 PM

woohoo

and watch football!

11/21/2007 12:15:53 PM

goodness knows it probably takes 5 hours to get everything ready and on the table and we have plenty of mishaps but we just laugh about it. Thank goodness our family isn't into formal dinners or anything.

Sometimes i feel bad for ^ and the other nonhuffman people around because me, my sisters and my mom get into this world where no one really understands us very well...but i hear it's funny and a bit tiring to watch.

11/21/2007 12:18:59 PM

i dread the annual question session as well

now i really don't feel like leaving tomorrow

11/21/2007 12:58:18 PM

dont forget state basketball on thanksgiving this year too

11/21/2007 12:59:25 PM

somehow, i knew this thread would be awesome

11/21/2007 1:08:01 PM

i got picked on by some kids in my family this year for not having a gf, muhahahaha silly kids. can't wait until they grow up, i am going to get their asses back for picking on me!

[Edited on November 25, 2007 at 5:19 PM. Reason : sfr]

11/25/2007 5:18:20 PM

I flew home at the last second for thanksgiving. Cost me too much money and I only got to be there for a day. But it was absolutely worth every penny.

Surprised my whole family, mom broke down crying she was so happy to see me. I love the holidays because I actually have a pretty awesome immediate family and great friends.

Can't wait to get back to NC for Christmas, to see family and friends and tell them how fucking awesome Seattle is

11/28/2007 4:52:48 AM

bttt

let's hear how everyone's holidays went with the family

1/2/2008 10:21:59 AM

My family was all cool this year actually

1/2/2008 10:25:58 AM

yeah my family didn't bust my balls as hard cause my gf was with me

and they were all concerned with my irresponsible cousin's bastard child which was born on Christmas day

1/2/2008 10:34:38 AM

hilarious

1/2/2008 10:43:30 AM