So I submitted my graduate school applications weeks ago, and everything is complete except for one of my reccomendations. Her reccomendation will be one of my strongest ones. When I first asked her to do it, she set a personal deadline, and didn't meet it. I sent her a polite email reminding her to do it and she told me that she didn't get to it because her mom had been hospitalized, but that she would get to it by the end of that week.

Another week has gone by and still no reccomendation. How do I remind her again and actually get her to do it without being too pushy and making her mad?

2/12/2007 9:01:21 PM

I would find another recommendor...FAST

When are your deadlines?

2/12/2007 9:08:25 PM

Deadlines are in May...but I'd really rather not wait that long to have my applications reviewed.

2/12/2007 9:13:47 PM

get another recommender right away, you can tell them what happened if you think it would help.

then if/when she comes up with the letter, you can eitehr include it along with, or send it after the fact to be added.

you dont want to piss her off, obviously, but you cant sit around and wait and be SOL if she never comes through.

my wife had the same thing happen to her.

i know its like but you just gotta be

2/12/2007 9:21:41 PM

^ It's true.

2/12/2007 9:44:04 PM

when i had applied to rutgers last october, i checked my application status online and it had said only 2 recommendations were received. so i called trying to find which ones they received so I could send in the other one, but the secretary didnt answer so I left a message.

a few days later, i got an email from her saying "I just wanted to inform you that your application is incomplete. We are missing the following item: One letter of recommendation. Your application will not be reviewed until all required documents are received." no fucking shit. but luckily by that time, Penn State (my first choice) had already made me an offer.

anyway, to the point. i think you should find another recommender very soon just so your application is complete so they can review it sooner. however, since this woman will provide the strongest recommendation, i would still pursue it as there is generally no maximum to the number of recommendations required, and it definitely wouldnt hurt (unless you pressure her so much that she writes a bad one :beatup

as for how to approach her, if she is a prof or someone you see frequently, just go speak with her, if not call her. either way try to speak directly to her. as for what to say, i would recommend being honest and say something like "although the deadline is not an immediate issue, the sooner that my full application is in, the sooner that they can review it and assess and reserve financial aid provisions."... or something... just to give a tangible impetus to the situation.

good luck!

2/12/2007 9:57:45 PM

i definitely would not bust her nuts about it again, at all. if you send another reminder, you're going to sound like a nudge.

I would, however, make a point to visit her, or if that's not appropriate, to coincidentally "run into" her. then be friendly and ask her how her mother is doing, well you hope, and how are her classes this semester coming along (shes a professor i assume). be absolutely sincere of course, and don't mention the letter at all. she'll probably bring it up on her own.





[Edited on February 13, 2007 at 2:52 AM. Reason : ]

2/13/2007 2:50:00 AM

Look for another person to write for you as a backup. You can also send an e-mail to the person you want saying that you understand if they're too busy with family concerns to write anything for you but you would like to know so you can have backup plans. The teacher has likely been through the same process and will understand as long as you word it nicely.

2/13/2007 8:24:50 AM

^ dont do that.

2/13/2007 12:00:12 PM