^

12/19/2005 9:02:28 PM

West Virginia

12/19/2005 9:07:28 PM

I got the black lung pa *ahe* *ahe*

12/19/2005 9:10:37 PM

From a bag of charcoal briquettes.

12/19/2005 9:11:45 PM

nah, it's gotta look like fireplace/oven fuel. so i guess i'm asking where i can find some soft coal.

we've joked for a long time that if dad doesn't give us a wishlist, all he's gonna get is coal...and he didn't give anyone a wishlist.

12/19/2005 9:15:31 PM

Burn some wood and make your own.

12/19/2005 9:23:11 PM

not looking for charcoal
that's easy to find

looking for bituminous
the traditional lump of coal left in stockings of bad children

12/19/2005 9:31:04 PM

He won't know the difference.

12/19/2005 9:34:44 PM

actually, yeah, he will, considering he used to help the farm workers make charcoal

12/19/2005 9:40:49 PM

have a seat on some regular charcoal and fart.

12/19/2005 9:43:02 PM

Give some head to the dabney chem supply duder

12/19/2005 9:44:35 PM

^now there's an idea

12/19/2005 9:45:01 PM

http://www.coal.com/

12/19/2005 9:48:14 PM

last year i think they had some really little ones at Michael's and a stocking to go with it

12/20/2005 7:17:53 AM

A few years back my sister made candy coal and put in it a lil metal bucket for my dad... heres the recipe she gave me:

2 cups sugar
3/4 cup light corn syrup
1/2 tsp. black paste food coloring
1/2 cup water
1 tsp. anise extract

Line 8" square baking pan with foil, extending edges over sides of pan. Lightly grease foil with butter. Combine sugar, corn syrup and water into heavy 2-quart saucepan. Stir over medium-low heat until sugar is dissolved and mixture comes to a boil, being careful not to splash sugar mixture on side of pan. Carefully clip candy thermometer to side of pan (do not let bulb touch bottom of pan). Cook about 15 minutes until thermometer registers 290 degrees F., without stirring. Immediately remove from heat. Stir in anise extract and food coloring. Pour mixture into prepared pan. Cool completely. Lift candy out of pan using foil. Place candy between 2 layers of heavy-duty foil. Pound with mallet to break candy into 1-2" pieces.

12/20/2005 8:09:14 AM

If you can't find coal here's one alternative.

You put a few white marshmallows in a bag with this note attached:

"You've been naughty, so here's the scoop...
You get nothing but snowman poop!"

12/20/2005 10:01:36 AM

The Cumberland River is full of it in Kentucky. Unfortunately for you, NC isn't exactly coal country.

12/20/2005 10:03:29 AM

dont forget the switches!

they make liquorice coal i believe

12/20/2005 11:00:55 AM

abonorio ftw

12/20/2005 11:47:37 AM

I saw a little stocking with a lump of coal in it at Wal-Mart not too long ago.

12/20/2005 11:50:45 AM

you can sometimes get lumps of real coal at museum gift shops

12/20/2005 12:11:38 PM

nicolle and megameg, thanks for the suggestions!

I'm trying to find an ABANA supplier who might have some lying around, but i'll just have to settle if they can't help
edit: i found a place in oregon who is willing to ship a pound of it. he said so many people have been coming in for the same reason that they opened up a bag to sell

SWEEEEEEEET

[Edited on December 20, 2005 at 1:53 PM. Reason : YAY]

12/20/2005 1:47:03 PM

12/20/2005 6:30:43 PM

my little brother does blacksmithing...he has something called "green coal"...but i have no idea what that is and i'm not going to google it

12/20/2005 6:44:15 PM

Well, this is kinda close in concept and time is running short for you.

How about activated charcoal?

A quick search reveals that Petsmart sells it for aquariums and GNC sells it as a digestive aid.

I've also seen Santa's coal gum, which comes in little bags and is composed to little black nuggets. I haven't seen it recently, or I'd tell you where.

Good luck. My dad has no hobbies and I struggle every year to find a good gift for him.

12/20/2005 8:21:51 PM

I have some lumps of coal you can have. just basic sooty blacksmithing coal.

12/20/2005 8:24:45 PM

^damn, i wish you would have seen this thread before!!

i figure $8 for a gag gift isn't too bad, though, so nothing to worry about

^^that santa's gum is probably at cracker barrel. they like selling that kind of stuff.

12/20/2005 10:24:08 PM